


Avengers on Twitter

by LadyArtemis13



Series: Peter Parker: Cinnamon Roll Tattoo Artist [2]
Category: Marvel Cinematic Universe, Spider-Man: Homecoming (2017), The Avengers (Marvel Movies)
Genre: Adult Peter Paker, Age Appropriate Starker, Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, Artist Peter Parker, Canon Divergence - Post-Thor: Ragnarok (2017), Cinnamon Roll Peter Parker, Clint and Natasha are Bros, Deaf Clint Barton, Everybody Ships It, F/M, Identity Reveal, Jewish Wanda Maximoff, Kinda, Loki and Bruce Are Bros, M/M, Married Bucky Barnes/Steve Rogers, Not Avengers: Endgame (Movie) Compliant, Not Avengers: Infinity War Part 1 (Movie) Compliant, Not Captain America: Civil War (Movie) Compliant, Oblivious Peter Parker, Oblivious Tony Stark, Peter Loves All The Animals, Peter Parker-centric, Peter and Natasha Are Bros, Peter and Wanda Are Bros, Pierced Peter Parker, Tattoo Artist Peter Parker, Tattooed Peter Parker, Twitter
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2019-06-17
Updated: 2020-04-30
Packaged: 2020-05-13 10:52:53
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 59
Words: 28,212
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/19249723
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/LadyArtemis13/pseuds/LadyArtemis13
Summary: What happens when Spiderman joins Twitter? I'll tell you what happens: the world gets a closer look at the relationships between the Avengers and their extended allies. They also get a closer look at the life of the wall-crawler himself. Spoiler: Everyone loves Spidey (especially Tony).





	1. Hey there, Twitter

**Author's Note:**

> Guilty pleasure: Avengers Twitter fics. So, here I am. I've made one of my own in my little happy fantasy Avengers world. This story, while technically second in the 'series', may not fully align with any others I end up posting in this universe. Just keep in mind that it is actually all the same universe. Meaning, Peter is a wonderful tattoo artist and he and Tony are oblivious fools that exasperate all of their friends.

**Friendly Neighborhood @Spiderman**

Hey there, Twitter. It’s me, ya boy.

**IHeartSpiderman @SpideyStan1**

Please don’t let this be a fake account. Please let this actually be Spiderman.

**Friendly Neighborhood @Spiderman**

**@SpideyStan1** Like I said, it’s me, ya boy. _[SpideySelfie.jpg](https://www.google.com/search?q=spiderman+selfie+top+of+tower&rlz=1C1CHBD_enUS720US720&source=lnms&tbm=isch&sa=X&ved=0ahUKEwjJi_DB-O_iAhUG7awKHeJLCYIQ_AUIECgB&biw=1600&bih=789#imgrc=ITNAMNEhEkejZM:)_

**Spiderman Replied To Me!!! @SpideyStan1**

WHAT!!??!!

**I Cant Pick One @AvengersStan**

Oh my god it’s happening. Everybody stay calm!!

**Im Doing My Best @AmIThough**

This might just be the day Twitter crashes. We can only pray now that one of the others show up and confirm…

**You Know Who I Am @IronMan**

**@Spiderman** I thought we agreed you were gonna stop taking dangerous pictures from the tops of buildings?

**Goodbye Lucy @LucilleSanders**

Talk about prayers coming true quick. **@AmIThough** Did you pray to Thor or something?

**You Know Who I Am @IronMan**

**@Spiderman** Don’t ignore me. I know your notifications are on.

**Friendly Neighborhood @Spiderman**

There was no agreement. You said stop taking dangerous pictures. I said it’s not dangerous.

**Original Spider @BlackWidow**

Tony, you know he’s fine. He thrives on ridiculous heights and humanly impossible balance.

**Better Bird Avenger @Falcon**

Leave him be, Nat. You know he worries about his boy.

**I Hate White Vans @DanielPerez**

His boy??!!?? I mean, we’ve all seen them in videos after battles and stuff but is #IronSpider real??!!??

**Friendly Neighborhood @Spiderman**

**@DanielPerez** No it is not.

**You Know Who I Am @IronMan**

**@DanielPerez** No, it’s not. We’re friends

**First Bird Avenger @Hawkeye**

More like, not yet it’s not. #IronSpider

**Better Bird Avenger @Falcon**

rt

**Original Spider @BlackWidow**

rt

**Iced Americano @CaptainAmerica**

rt

**Tired Old Man @BuckyBarnes**

rt

**Thunderstruck @Thor**

rt

**Witchy Woman @ScarletWitch**

rt

**The Other Guy @BruceBanner**

rt

**Friggason @Loki**

rt

 

**Clever Name @ActualName**

Wow, I can’t believe the Avengers (+ Loki) are shipping trash for #IronSpider.

**First Bird Avenger @Hawkeye**

**@ActualName** We gotta represent our OTP.


	2. What dog breeds...

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I did everybody I could match a dog to (except Loki).

**I’ve Got A @WeirdQuestion**

**@Spiderman** Weird question but here we go: What type of dog would all of the Avengers be?

**Friendly Neighborhood @Spiderman**

**@WeirdQuestion @CaptainAmerica** Oh man, Steve is a golden retriever for sure. No explanation needed. _[GoldenRetriever.jpg](https://www.google.com/search?q=golden+retriever&rlz=1C1CHBD_enUS720US720&sxsrf=ALeKk03gibaGX4cGcoX27XfAJCueC68OZA:1584134706116&source=lnms&tbm=isch&sa=X&ved=2ahUKEwjEuLzTsZjoAhWnTt8KHcO9C-cQ_AUoAXoECCEQAw#imgrc=-Ru6MScBanMPWM)_

**Friendly Neighborhood @Spiderman**

**@BuckyBarnes** And Bucky is definitely a pit-bull. A bit of a bad reputation but really just a marshmallow when you get to know him.[ _PitBull.jpg_](https://www.google.com/search?q=pit+bull+three+legs&rlz=1C1CHBD_enUS720US720&source=lnms&tbm=isch&sa=X&ved=0ahUKEwiJ0vuh-u_iAhUGhOAKHfZvA0AQ_AUIECgB&biw=1600&bih=789#imgrc=lNDou_ZhFrCduM)

**Friendly Neighborhood @Spiderman**

**@BlackWidow** Natasha’s a husky. One of those really pretty red ones. She’s Russian which means she thrives on snow. _[Husky.jpg](https://www.google.com/search?q=red+husky&rlz=1C1CHBD_enUS720US720&source=lnms&tbm=isch&sa=X&ved=0ahUKEwjf9MKv-u_iAhUEhOAKHYKsCRoQ_AUIECgB&biw=1600&bih=789#imgrc=OB6pX9oEspb40M:)_

**Friendly Neighborhood @Spiderman**

**@Hawkeye** Clint’s a lab. Dependable and friendly and it just feels right. _[YellowLab.jpg](https://www.google.com/search?q=yellow+lab&rlz=1C1CHBD_enUS720US720&source=lnms&tbm=isch&sa=X&ved=0ahUKEwjAuYnH-u_iAhUNT98KHRyKCoUQ_AUIECgB&biw=1600&bih=789#imgrc=4Y22f2mt_-rAtM:)_

**Friendly Neighborhood @Spiderman**

**@Falcon** Sam’s a German shepherd. He’s protective and loyal and, again, it just feels right. _[GermanShepherd.jpg](https://www.google.com/search?q=german+shepherd&rlz=1C1CHBD_enUS720US720&source=lnms&tbm=isch&sa=X&ved=0ahUKEwiivZPU-u_iAhUEhOAKHYKsCRoQ_AUIECgB&biw=1600&bih=789#imgrc=NPmr_ZECKPYn8M)_

**Friendly Neighborhood @Spiderman**

**@BruceBanner** Bruce is a newfoundland. Can be big and intimidating but really just a big ball of fluff. _[Newfoundland.jpg](https://www.google.com/search?q=newfoundland+dog&rlz=1C1CHBD_enUS720US720&source=lnms&tbm=isch&sa=X&ved=0ahUKEwjsw7no-u_iAhWBneAKHTXoDTgQ_AUIECgB&biw=1600&bih=789#imgrc=IJeT6w5Qow0fIM:)_

**Friendly Neighborhood @Spiderman**

**@Thor** Thor’s a Norwegian elkhound. Strong and loyal and brave and (obviously) Norwegian. _[NorwegianElkhound.jpg](https://www.google.com/search?q=norwegian+elkhound&rlz=1C1CHBD_enUS720US720&source=lnms&tbm=isch&sa=X&ved=0ahUKEwjfl7z1-u_iAhUDSN8KHdvpB10Q_AUIECgB&biw=1600&bih=789#imgrc=D0zDLvTOkVOo_M)_

**Friendly Neighborhood @Spiderman**

**@IronMan** Tony’s a Boykin spaniel. Intelligent and energetic. Plus, that fur totally matches his hair after he’s been in the lab for hours working on a project. _[BoykinSpaniel.jpg](https://www.google.com/search?q=boykin+spaniel&rlz=1C1CHBD_enUS720US720&source=lnms&tbm=isch&sa=X&ved=0ahUKEwjUmJeA--_iAhVpm-AKHbb5CWEQ_AUIECgB&biw=1600&bih=789#imgrc=KwD1tIdJhjrexM:)_

**I’ve Got A @WeirdQuestion**

I’m crying. This is so much better than I hoped for. They’re all just perfect!

**Bi Bi Bi @ImNotInvisible**

**@Spiderman** What about you? And Loki?

**Friendly Neighborhood @Spiderman**

**@Loki** Loki is definitely a cat. No further explanation required.[ _BlackCat.jpg_](https://www.google.com/search?q=black+cat&rlz=1C1CHBD_enUS720US720&source=lnms&tbm=isch&sa=X&ved=0ahUKEwj28cCT--_iAhWPneAKHcTZCYsQ_AUIECgB&biw=1600&bih=789#imgrc=8XsVgbqP4Iy_-M:)

**Thunderstruck @Thor**

These do seem rather accurate. Especially Loki.

**I Cant Pick One @AvengersStan**

But what about Spidey?!?

**You Know Who I Am @IronMan**

**@Spiderman** He’s a miniature poodle. _[MiniPoodle.jpg](https://www.google.com/search?rlz=1C1CHBD_enUS720US720&biw=1600&bih=789&tbm=isch&sa=1&ei=RD0HXev4FJHW5gKmj6DABg&q=miniature+poodle+brown&oq=miniature+poodle+brown&gs_l=img.3..0j0i8i30l4j0i24.14873.15449..15599...0.0..0.106.596.2j4......0....1..gws-wiz-img.fLP3epOJ_9U#imgrc=rVKDeqGNpq8oCM:)_

**Friendly Neighborhood @Spiderman**

What!?!

**Better Bird Avenger @Falcon**

LMAO. Yes! That is perfect!

**Tired Old Man @BuckyBarnes**

I’ve never seen anything more accurate.

**Friendly Neighborhood @Spiderman**

Shut up Bucky! **@IronMan** How can you say that? I am not a poodle!

**You Know Who I Am @IronMan**

**@Spiderman** You’re small. You’re cute. You’re intelligent. You’re active.

**Friendly Neighborhood @Spiderman**

…Alright, fine. I guess I’m a poodle.

**First Bird Avenger @Hawkeye**

A MINIATURE poodle.

**Friendly Neighborhood @Spiderman**

Shut up, Clint!

**Better Bird Avenger @Falcon**

Aaaw, it’s even got your curls.

**Friendly Neighborhood @Spiderman**

Shut up, Sam!

 

 

**I’ve Got A @WeirdQuestion**

I’m crying again. It got even better.

**Ten Points To Slytherin @Page394**

LMAO. Loki IS a cat. I can’t even imagine what dog he could be. All I can picture is cats.

**Give Me A D @ImNotAEvenACheerleader**

Man, Tony was ready with that poodle, huh? #IronSpider

**Look At All Those Chickens @ImADuck**

He called him cute! #OTP #IronSpider

**More Like Hurricane Tortilla @KatrinaGranger**

Let’s focus on what’s really important here people: Spidey has curls?!? That are on par with an actual poodle?!?

**Spiderman Replied To Me!!! @SpideyStan1**

**@KatrinaGranger** I know!!! I can not wait for him to finally release his identity and face to the public!!!

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Notice that a lot of my Twitter names are vine references. Also, many of them are repeated because coming up with Twitter names is hard. If you have a name you'd like me to use for this story just leave it in the comments along with any ideas you may have. Seriously, if there's something you'd like to see on the Avengers' imaginary twitters just comment below and I'll see what I can do.  
> I should be able to update this story weekly, but, we'll see. *shrugs*


	3. Is your heat...

**Friendly Neighborhood @Spiderman**

It’s cold outside and I don’t like it.

**Friendly Neighborhood @Spiderman**

If I didn’t love New York so much I’d move somewhere that’s warm year-round.

**You Know Who I Am @IronMan**

You could always move into the tower with the rest of us. It’s warm there.

**Friendly Neighborhood @Spiderman**

Tony. We talked about this. I’m fine. I can take care of myself.

**You Know Who I Am @IronMan**

Spidey, do you even have heat right now?

**Friendly Neighborhood @Spiderman**

Yes, actually, I do.

**You Know Who I Am @IronMan**

Because you kicked it? Or because it’s actually working for once?

**Friendly Neighborhood @Spiderman**

…because I kicked it.

**Witchy Woman @ScarletWitch**

What do you mean it’s only working because you kicked it?!?

**Original Spider @BlackWidow**

…excuse me?

**First Bird Avenger @Hawkeye**

WTF Spidey?

**Better Bird Avenger @Falcon**

Dude. I knew things were a little rough but are you seriously saying your heat’s not even working?

**Friendly Neighborhood @Spiderman**

I said it’s working!!

**Tired Old Man @BuckyBarnes**

Yeah for now. How long is that kick gonna last?

**Iced Americano @CaptainAmerica**

I have to agree with Sam and Bucky.

**First Bird Avenger @Hawkeye**

Oh, what a surprise that is.

**Iced Americano @CaptainAmerica**

Shut up Clint. Spidey, it’s 36 degrees outside. That is way too cold for you to be without heat.

**Friendly Neighborhood @Spiderman**

I said it’s working! Besides, I have one of those little space heaters for when it stops again.

**Witchy Woman @ScarletWitch**

…when?

**Friendly Neighborhood @Spiderman**

IF! I MEANT IF!

**First Bird Avenger @Hawkeye**

Wait, where’d Tony disappear to?

**Better Bird Avenger @Falcon**

He’s probably freaking out because his boy’s sitting in a freezing cold apartment.

**Tired Old Man @BuckyBarnes**

Or he’s pouting because Spidey said no to moving in again.

**The Other Guy @BruceBanner**

Actually guys, we’re both in the lab right now and he appears to be ordering fluffy blankets, hoodies, and fuzzy socks.

**Original Spider @BlackWidow**

Three guesses who those are for.

**Friendly Neighborhood @Spiderman**

What?!? **@IronMan** you don’t have to do that!

**You Know Who I Am @IronMan**

I’m not gonna have you sitting in the cold like that. If you won’t move into the nice, HEATED tower, then I can at least do this.

**Friendly Neighborhood @Spiderman**

Tony, I’m fine. It’s not even that cold.

**You Know Who I Am @IronMan**

Sweetheart, just let me take care of you.

**Friendly Neighborhood @Spiderman**

 Tony…

**You Know Who I Am @IronMan**

Please.

**Friendly Neighborhood @Spiderman**

…okay. But I will pay you back.

**You Know Who I Am @IronMan**

Nope. Not happening. Also, I’m coming over to see if it’s really “not even that cold”.

**Friendly Neighborhood @Spiderman**

Tony!

 

 

**I Know How To Pronounce My State @ItShouldBeArKansas**

OMG. I love those two so much.

**Look At All Those Chickens @ImADuck**

He called him sweetheart!!! My OTP is thriving!!! #IronSpider

**Bi Bi Bi @ImNotInvisible**

Listen, Tony calling Spiderman sweetheart and trying to take care of him is my new aesthetic.

**I Cant Pick One @AvengersStan**

**@Spiderman** move into the tower! Just imagine all the new #IronSpider content we would get if they actually lived together.

**It Is What I Think @RebeccaLopez**

Okay, like, I’m here for the #IronSpider but, like, I’m also legit concerned about Spidey? His apartment is freezing right now!?!

**Spiderman Replied To Me!!! @SpideyStan1**

Same. And not to alarm anyone, but I did some research on spiders (we all know why) and apparently, they can’t thermoregulate. Can Spidey or….?

 

 

**Tired Old Man @BuckyBarnes**

**@IronMan** So, how cold is it? Are we kidnapping Spidey to the tower?

**You Know Who I Am @IronMan**

Oh, believe me, we’re already on the way.

**First Bird Avenger @Hawkeye**

That bad, huh?

**You Know Who I Am @IronMan**

I didn’t even know he was on the couch when I walked in! I thought it was just a pile of blankets until he poked his head out. And he was still shivering!

**You Know Who I Am @IronMan**

An accurate representation of Spidey: _[dogwrappedinblankets.jpg](https://www.google.com/search?q=dog+wrapped+in+blankets&rlz=1C1CHBD_enUS720US720&source=lnms&tbm=isch&sa=X&ved=0ahUKEwiDpZuf_O_iAhVOUt8KHYFbAuEQ_AUIECgB&biw=1600&bih=789#imgrc=SyFT_otJCCSasM:)_

**Original Spider @BlackWidow**

Get him over here right now!

**Witchy Woman @ScarletWitch**

I’ll start the hot chocolate.

**Iced Americano @CaptainAmerica**

I’ll get the blankets.

**Better Bird Avenger @Falcon**

I’ll find us some movies.

 

**Clever Name @ActualName**

Man, you just gotta love that family dynamic. #AvengersFamily

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Notice that a lot of my Twitter names are vine references. Also, many of them are repeated because coming up with Twitter names is hard. If you have a name you'd like me to use for this story just leave it in the comments along with any ideas you may have. Seriously, if there's something you'd like to see on the Avengers' imaginary twitters just comment below and I'll see what I can do.  
> I should be able to update this story weekly, but, we'll see. *shrugs*


	4. Which John Mulaney bit...

**I’ve Got A @WeirdQuestion**

**@Spiderman** Weird question but here we go: What John Mulaney bit best represents each Avenger?

**Friendly Neighborhood @Spiderman**

Amazing question! Hold up, I’ll tell everybody to answer.

**Friendly Neighborhood @Spiderman**

Okay everybody’s on their phones. I myself feel most represented by:[ _IAmVerySmall.jpg_](https://www.google.com/search?rlz=1C1CHBD_enUS720US720&biw=1600&bih=789&tbm=isch&sa=1&ei=rgAfXdS-A9m4tAaI6bywCw&q=john+mulaney+i+am+very+small&oq=john+mulaney+i+am+very+small&gs_l=img.3..35i39j0j0i24.55668.62097..62354...0.0..0.330.3990.4j24j1j1......0....1..gws-wiz-img.......0i67j0i8i30.WQ2RsuuFzFs#imgrc=lqcgytJPmA39LM:)

**Iced Americano @CaptainAmerica**

I really feel this one:[ _NewNazis.gif_](https://www.google.com/search?rlz=1C1CHBD_enUS720US720&biw=1600&bih=789&tbm=isch&sa=1&ei=Lj8HXaGVC6WG5wKy8anwAw&q=john+mulaney+new+nazis&oq=john+mulaney+new+nazis&gs_l=img.3...25585.26753..26866...0.0..0.103.872.6j3......0....1..gws-wiz-img.......0j0i8i30j0i24.OFIQZmG7Bh8#imgrc=wnbGwcie3D4RFM:)

**Tired Old Man @BuckyBarnes**

Ah, yes. Here I am: _[YouWantMeToDoWhat.gif](https://www.google.com/search?rlz=1C1CHBD_enUS720US720&biw=1600&bih=789&tbm=isch&sxsrf=ACYBGNS32RREhHbPwnNy3CwyysEgKSorIQ%3A1568018026215&sa=1&ei=ag52XbzhDMyG5wKEgrn4Bw&q=john+mulaney+you+want+me+to+do+what&oq=john+mulaney+you+want+me&gs_l=img.1.0.35i39j0j0i8i30.3059.4275..5401...0.0..0.74.701.11......0....1..gws-wiz-img.......0i24.um3ee3rwhhA#imgrc=EAr8gYED4dqNUM:)_

**Original Spider @BlackWidow**

_[AllMyEmotionsRightHere.jpg](https://www.google.com/search?rlz=1C1CHBD_enUS720US720&biw=1600&bih=789&tbm=isch&sa=1&ei=cT8HXbuZGY_e5gKBz4ugBg&q=john+mulaney+all+my+emotions&oq=john+mulaney+all+my+emotions&gs_l=img.3...20149.22036..22146...0.0..0.153.1479.10j5......0....1..gws-wiz-img.......0j0i8i30j0i24.fO_t3N6kyjk#imgrc=DfGK15J4iXGdLM:) _

**First Bird Avenger @Hawkeye**

Truer words never spoken: _[CancelingPlans.jpg](https://www.google.com/search?rlz=1C1CHBD_enUS720US720&biw=1600&bih=789&tbm=isch&sa=1&ei=K9o_Xbq-E6il_Qa4roLYCg&q=john+mulaney+canceling+plans&oq=john+mulaney+canceling+plans&gs_l=img.3...46024.47653..47759...0.0..0.111.1523.10j6......0....1..gws-wiz-img.......35i39j0j0i67j0i24.6S52R0SwvMA&ved=0ahUKEwj6__31-NvjAhWoUt8KHTiXAKsQ4dUDCAY&uact=5#imgrc=12vZUSJq9LfZ5M)_

**Better Bird Avenger @Falcon**

I’ve learned that when you hang around people like this, you just take things as they come. [_ThisMightAsWellHappen.gif_](https://www.google.com/search?rlz=1C1CHBD_enUS720US720&biw=1600&bih=789&tbm=isch&sa=1&ei=iD8HXeavLobs5gKF176gCg&q=john+mulaney+moight+as+wll+happen&oq=john+mulaney+moight+as+wll+happen&gs_l=img.3...49208.52398..52558...0.0..0.161.2425.9j13......0....1..gws-wiz-img.......0.GVkCJASLDR8#imgrc=OLX-4p252q-AQM:)

**The Other Guy @BruceBanner**

I think this speaks for itself: _[YouKnowLife.jpg](https://www.google.com/search?rlz=1C1CHBD_enUS720US720&biw=1600&bih=789&tbm=isch&sa=1&ei=vj8HXZvaJNKC5wKuk6CIDA&q=john+mulaney+you+know+life&oq=john+mulaney+you+know+life&gs_l=img.3..0.60811.62184..62247...0.0..0.155.1144.5j6......0....1..gws-wiz-img.......0i8i30j0i24.fEXhW0CJSEE#imgrc=BNHyl6SuwhSR_M:)_

**Witchy Woman @ScarletWitch**

The height’s off, but here I am: _[JewishBitch.jpg](https://www.google.com/search?rlz=1C1CHBD_enUS720US720&biw=1600&bih=789&tbm=isch&sa=1&ei=_T8HXYm5OaH85gL2w5_IBg&q=john+mulaney+jewish+bitch&oq=john+mulaney+jewish+bitch&gs_l=img.3...19424.21674..21850...0.0..0.108.1341.10j4......0....1..gws-wiz-img.......0j0i8i30j0i24.PMs9PczYqIA#imgrc=yLraJdMvRrCGAM:)_

**Thunderstruck @Thor**

A lot has happened in the last few years especially… _[TimeToUnpackAllOfThat.gif](https://www.google.com/search?rlz=1C1CHBD_enUS720US720&biw=1600&bih=789&tbm=isch&sa=1&ei=FUAHXfOhAYyu5wLIhYW4DQ&q=john+mulaney+time+to+umpack+that&oq=john+mulaney+time+to+umpack+that&gs_l=img.3...20934.23430..23456...0.0..0.172.1942.9j9......0....1..gws-wiz-img.......0j0i24.6tGnkLsxTPM#imgrc=o045GgfemwMHiM:)_

**Friggason @Loki**

_[LikeALiar.gif](https://www.google.com/search?rlz=1C1CHBD_enUS720US720&biw=1600&bih=789&tbm=isch&sa=1&ei=LUAHXevKIMTR5gL39ZvwBQ&q=john+mulaney+no+like+a+liar&oq=john+mulaney+no+like+a+liar&gs_l=img.3..0i8i30j0i24.22874.24279..24351...0.0..0.319.1499.8j4j0j1......0....1..gws-wiz-img.......0j0i30.-E7oRpiuDV8#imgrc=sgt4GAQry-8E1M:) _

**You Know Who I Am @IronMan**

**@Spiderman** _[RockingTwink.jpg](https://www.google.com/search?rlz=1C1CHBD_enUS720US720&biw=1600&bih=789&tbm=isch&sa=1&ei=R0AHXfTVFNGL5wKMzpmABA&q=john+mulaney+rocking+twink&oq=john+mulaney+rocking+twink&gs_l=img.3...29736.31335..31515...0.0..0.167.1528.9j6......0....1..gws-wiz-img.......0i67j0j0i24.9gGkmDaFmnU#imgrc=mXngzSrQGbFL1M:) _

**Friendly Neighborhood @Spiderman**

Tony, no!

**You Know Who I Am @IronMan**

Tony, yes.

**Friendly Neighborhood @Spiderman**

Anthony…

**First Bird Avenger @Hawkeye**

Oooo, full name. Someone’s in trouble.

**You Know Who I Am @IronMan**

Fine. Tony, no. Luckily, I also feel represented by this: _[HadToStopDrinking.gif](https://www.google.com/search?rlz=1C1CHBD_enUS720US720&biw=1600&bih=789&tbm=isch&sa=1&ei=3lo1XZnCDtLN_AbpoYLQBw&q=john+mulaney+quit+drinking&oq=john+mulaney+quit+drinking&gs_l=img.3...31661.33350..33477...0.0..0.148.1274.10j3......0....1..gws-wiz-img.......0j0i10i24.9PXyEKLS6rY&ved=0ahUKEwiZqaaO9sfjAhXSJt8KHemQAHoQ4dUDCAY&uact=5#imgrc=bFcGCoMqzgomfM:)_

 

**Goodbye Lucy @LucilleSanders**

Honestly, bless **@WeirdQuestion** We learn so much about the Avengers because of that account.

**In Front Of My Salad!!! @IDon’tEvenLikeSalad**

I’ve never felt so connected to my heroes before…

**Bi Bi Bi @ImNotInvisible**

LMAO at Tony’s first choice.

**Spiderman Replied To Me!!! @SpideyStan1**

I love how they apparently all knew he was in trouble as soon as Spidey said ‘Anthony’. #IronSpider

**More Like Hurricane Tortilla @KatrinaGranger**

Confirmed Spidey Facts (Thanks to **@WeirdQuestion** ):

  1. Curly hair on par with a (miniature) poodle
  2. Rocking Twink™



**Theres A Bee!!??!! @EthanyWithaB**

I stan one (1) captain!!! #CapForPresident

**Clever Name @ActualName**

I can’t wait for the next weird question the Avengers answer…

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> If you've got a weird question for the Avengers to answer just leave it in the comments.


	5. Meet Sophia

**Friendly Neighborhood @Spiderman**

**@IronMan** How do you feel about cats?

**You Know Who I Am @IronMan**

Largely indifferent. Why are you asking?

**Original Spider @BlackWidow**

I’m pretty sure we all have an idea why he’s asking…

**You Know Who I Am @IronMan**

**@Spiderman** No.

**Friendly Neighborhood @Spiderman**

You don’t even know what I was gonna ask!

**You Know Who I Am @IronMan**

Oh, but I do. You are not bringing some mangy stray cat into my tower.

**Friendly Neighborhood @Spiderman**

Sophia does not have mange!

**Better Bird Avenger @Falcon**

Great. He’s already named it.

**Tired Old Man @BuckyBarnes**

**@Falcon** *her

**Friendly Neighborhood @Spiderman**

Thank you, Bucky.

**Friendly Neighborhood @Spiderman**

**@IronMan** Tony, please! I’ve already cleaned her up and fed her and she’s very sweet. She just needs a home and someone to love her.

**You Know Who I Am @IronMan**

…you cleaned her up and fed her? Where?

**Friendly Neighborhood @Spiderman**

Yes? My apartment?

**Iced Americano @CaptainAmerica**

Spidey, your apartment doesn’t allow animals.

**Friendly Neighborhood @Spiderman**

Yeah, I know. So, we’re kinda on a time crunch here.

**Witchy Woman @ScarletWitch**

I say yes! She’s cute.

**Tired Old Man @BuckyBarnes**

Agreed. I vote yes.

**You Know Who I Am @IronMan**

There is no vote! It’s my tower.

**You Know Who I Am @IronMan**

**@ScarletWitch @Bucky Barnes** And you haven’t even seen it!

**Witchy Woman @ScarletWitch**

*her She's a cat, Tony. All cats are cute.

**Tired Old Man @BuckyBarnes**

He does make a good point though. **@Spiderman** Show us a picture.

**Friendly Neighborhood @Spiderman**

_[PleaseTonyPlease.jpg](https://www.google.com/search?rlz=1C1CHBD_enUS720US720&biw=1600&bih=789&tbm=isch&sa=1&ei=lM8OXeot0oqCB5TPjfgM&q=cat+in+sink&oq=cat+in+sink&gs_l=img.3..0l2j0i5i30l3j0i8i30j0i24l4.42928.44058..44259...0.0..0.132.1113.5j6......0....1..gws-wiz-img.......0i67.X4pR5BKP1GQ#imgrc=MuJ1G_3DpfEeyM:) _

**First Bird Avenger @Hawkeye**

It _is_ cute but I vote no. I’m a dog person.

**Friendly Neighborhood @Spiderman**

All animals need love, Clint!

**You Know Who I Am IronMan**

There is no vote!

**Iced Americano @CaptainAmerica**

Now Tony, we all live in the tower. Maybe we should call for a vote…

**You Know Who I Am @IronMan**

Shut up, Steve! You’re just saying that because Bucky wants to keep it.

**Tired Old Man @BuckyBarnes**

**@IronMan** *her

**Friggason @Loki**

**@Spiderman** This creature… I like it.

**Friendly Neighborhood @Spiderman**

You do??!!!?? You wanna adopt her, Loki? I’m sure she’d like Norway and you two should get along great!

**Friggason @Loki**

…I shall be there momentarily.

**Better Bird Avenger @Falcon**

Did Loki just teleport himself to Spidey’s apartment all the way from Norway?

**Tired Old Man @BuckyBarnes**

Probably.

**Original Spider @BlackWidow**

Yes.

**First Bird Avenger @Hawkeye**

**@BlackWidow** How could you possibly know that for sure? You’re sitting across the room from me.

**Original Spider @BlackWidow**

I just know.

**Friggason @Loki**

Sophia is absolutely magnificent. **@Thor** I shall be returning home with a new housemate. Also, **@Spiderman** you should move into the tower. Or even come to New Asgard if you want.

**Friendly Neighborhood @Spiderman**

My apartment is fine!

**Thunderstruck @Thor**

**@Loki** Of course, brother. Whatever makes you happy.

**Thunderstruck @Thor**

**@BruceBanner** Elskede, we have a new housemate.

**The Other Guy @BruceBanner**

Fine by me. I don’t mind cats.

**Witchy Woman @ScarletWitch**

Aaaw. :(

**Tired Old Man @BuckyBarnes**

Aaaw. :(

**You Know Who I Am @IronMan**

Thank the gods.

**Thunderstruck @Thor**

**@IronMan** You’re welcome.

**Friggason @Loki**

**@IronMan** You should be thanking me.

 

 

 

**Spiderman Replied To Me!!! @SpideyStan1**

“All animals need love” Spidey is the softest boi and we stan.

**Paws and More @QueensAnimalShelter**

**@SpideyStan1** We absolutely stan! The number of times that Spidey has come in with a stray he found…

**I Cant Pick One @AvengersStan**

LMAO. Poor Tony. He better be thanking the gods that Loki came through or he definitely would have wound up with a cat in the tower. #AvengersFamily

**Road Work Ahead @NotAConstructionWorker**

I am living for Bucky and Wanda making sure they refer to Sophia as ‘her’ instead of ‘it’!

**Ten Points To Slytherin @Page394**

It’s nice to know that Loki will be among his own kind now that he has Sophia.

**Leslie More Like Lesbian @GirlsLoveGirls**

“I just know.” Listen, when I tell you that I got goosebumps. I stan one (1) queen and her name is Natasha.

**Winter Never Left @AstridHaugen**

Guys, I’m from Norway. I speak Norwegian. Thor calling Bruce ‘elskede’ just made me squeal so loud I scared my own cat. #OTP

**It Is What I Think @RebeccaLopez**

Guys, how bad is Spidey’s apartment? I’ve never seen it but I’m beginning to really think he should move into the tower too…

**More Like Hurricane Tortilla @KatrinaGranger**

Confirmed Spidey facts:

  1. Curly hair on par with a (miniature) poodle
  2. Rocking Twink™
  3. Animal Loving Soft Boi™



**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Listen, Sophia has only existed for a day but if anything happened to her I would kill everyone on this website and then myself. Credit goes to RulerOfThePandas for the 'road work ahead' Twitter name.  
> P.S. 'Elskede' means 'beloved' in Norwegian.


	6. Quick-Fire Questions

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Basically, this chapter exists because I had a lot of ideas for 'weird questions' but none that could really make a chapter on their own. So, ya'll get to learn more about the Peter that I've crafted for this particular universe!

**I’ve Got A @WeirdQuestion**

**@Spiderman** Do you have time for some quick-fire questions?

**Friendly Neighborhood @Spiderman**

**@WeirdQuestion** Absolutely! What have you got?

**I’ve Got A @WeirdQuestion**

**@Spiderman** What’s your favorite scent?

**Friendly Neighborhood @Spiderman**

Coconut.

**I’ve Got A @WeirdQuestion**

**@Spiderman** What’s your least favorite?

**Friendly Neighborhood @Spiderman**

Peppermint.

**I’ve Got A @WeirdQuestion**

**@Spiderman** How old are you?

**Friendly Neighborhood @Spiderman**

I’ll give you a range of late 20s to early 30s.

**I’ve Got A @WeirdQuestion**

**@Spiderman** Coke or Pepsi?

**Friendly Neighborhood @Spiderman**

I actually don’t do caffeine, but I do like polar bears so Coke.

**I’ve Got A @WeirdQuestion**

**@Spiderman** Beach or Mountains?

**Friendly Neighborhood @Spiderman**

Mountains. I’ve never gotten to test my webs on trees…

**I’ve Got A @WeirdQuestion**

**@Spiderman** Favorite Disney movie?

**Friendly Neighborhood @Spiderman**

Oliver and Company.

**I’ve Got A @WeirdQuestion**

**@Spiderman** Favorite Disney princess?

**Friendly Neighborhood @Spiderman**

Belle.

**I’ve Got A @WeirdQuestion**

**@Spiderman** Pineapple on pizza?

**Friendly Neighborhood @Spiderman**

Yes.

**I’ve Got A @WeirdQuestion**

**@Spiderman** Subway or Taxi?

**Friendly Neighborhood @Spiderman**

Subway.

**I’ve Got A @WeirdQuestion**

**@Spiderman** Boxers or briefs?

**Friendly Neighborhood @Spiderman**

Thongs.

**I’ve Got A @WeirdQuestion**

**@Spiderman** Jeans and a t-shirt or a three-piece suit?

**Friendly Neighborhood @Spiderman**

Jeans and a t-shirt. The only suit I own is the Spidey suit.

**I’ve Got A @WeirdQuestion**

**@Spiderman** Hogwarts house?

**Friendly Neighborhood @Spiderman**

Hufflepuff.

**I’ve Got A @WeirdQuestion**

**@Spiderman** Patronus?

**Friendly Neighborhood @Spiderman**

Capuchin monkey.

**I’ve Got A @WeirdQuestion**

**@Spiderman** Can you talk to spiders?

**Friendly Neighborhood @Spiderman**

… Well, this was fun. Gotta go now, bye!

 

**Better Bird Avenger @Falcon**

Wait, wait, wait. What the hell does that mean? (Also, wow you guys type really fast.)

**Better Bird Avenger @Falcon**

But seriously, what the hell does that last answer mean?!? **@Spiderman**

**Tired Old Man @BuckyBarnes**

**@Spiderman** Spidey, answer the man. Can you talk to spiders?!?

**Friendly Neighborhood @Spiderman**

…

**Iced Americano @CaptainAmerica**

Yeah, I don’t think he’s answering that one. Which worries me for multiple reasons.

**Original Spider @BlackWidow**

Interesting.

**Iced Americano @CaptainAmerica**

That also worries me for multiple reasons.

**First Bird Avenger @Hawkeye**

Guy, guys, as cool/freaky as the spider thing would be let’s focus on what’s really important:

**First Bird Avenger @Hawkeye**

**@Spiderman** Thongs?!?

**Friendly Neighborhood @Spiderman**

Yes, thongs. Have you seen how tight my suit is?

**Witchy Woman @ScarletWitch**

Well, when you put it like that…

**You Know Who I Am @IronMan**

Huh. Interesting.

**Tired Old Man @BuckyBarnes**

**@IronMan** You okay there, Tony?

**You Know Who I Am @IronMan**

I’m fine. I’m fine. It’s fine. Everything’s fine.

**Witchy Woman @ ScarletWitch**

**@Spiderman** I think you broke him.

**Friendly Neighborhood @Spiderman**

**@IronMan** Sorry, honey.

**Original Spider @BlackWidow**

Speaking of suits though, **@Spiderman** Spidey, how do you not own one actual suit?

**Friendly Neighborhood @Spiderman**

I avoid all formal events like the plague. I don’t need one.

**Better Bird Avenger @Falcon**

Spidey, you’re a grown man. You have to own at least one suit.

**Friendly Neighborhood @Spiderman**

On the contrary, I think you’ll find that I actually do not.

**You Know Who I Am @IronMan**

**@Spiderman** You know, I’ve got a tailor…

**Friendly Neighborhood @Spiderman**

**@IronMan** Tony, no.

**First Bird Avenger @Hawkeye**

**@IronMan** You just wanna see him in a suit.

**You Know Who I Am @IronMan**

Shut up, Clint. **@Spiderman** I’ll set you up an appointment, sweetheart.

**Friendly Neighborhood @Spiderman**

**@IronMan** Tony…

**Iced Americano @CaptainAmerica**

Well, this is an argument we’ll be hearing for a while.

 

 

**I’ve Got A @WeirdQuestion**

Wow, I did not expect all this. About the spider thing though…

**Look At All Those Chickens @ImADuck**

He called him sweetheart again!! And he called him honey!! #OTP #IronSpider

**Bi Bi Bi @ImNotInvisible**

It _is_ a tight suit. I’ve never really thought about it, but thongs make so much sense. Also, LMAO at Tony’s reaction. #IronSpider

**Spiderman Replied To Me!!! @SpideyStan1**

Remember that research on spiders I mentioned? I am _wheezing_ at the fact that Spidey hates peppermint and doesn’t drink caffeine!

**Theres A Bee!!??!! @EthanyWithaB**

Wow, I can’t wait to read Spidey’s autobiography entitled: Tony, no.

**Road Work Ahead @NotAConstructionWorker**

“I avoid all formal events like the plague.” Big Mood.

**Goodbye Lucy @LucilleSanders**

Once again, bless **@WeirdQuestion** We learned so much today!

 

 

**Better Bird Avenger @Falcon**

**@Spiderman** Seriously man, can you talk to spiders?!?

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Can Peter actually talk to spiders or is he just screwing with everybody? Even I don't know. Maybe I'll come back to that idea in a later chapter or story...  
> I made his patronus a Capuchin monkey because I didn't actually see any kinds of spiders on the list of possible Pottermore patronus forms. They're small, intelligent, and regularly swing through the trees (like a certain spider we all love) so I figured it fit.  
> By the way, the thong idea came from an interview with Tom Holland where he admitted that he does actually have to wear a thong under the Spidey suit. Poor thing.


	7. Actual Hypocrite Tony Stark

**Better Bird Avenger @Falcon**

**@Spiderman** You know, I’m almost glad you refuse to move into the tower. I don’t know if I could ever be truly comfortable again if you did.

**Friendly Neighborhood @Spiderman**

I said I was sorry.

**You Know Who I Am @IronMan**

**@Falcon** Do NOT tell him that!! **@Spiderman** You can move in at any time, sweetheart.

**Witchy Woman @ScarletWitch**

Wait, wait, wait. **@Falcon** What happened? How could Spidey, of all people, make you uncomfortable?

**Better Bird Avenger @Falcon**

Do you know how unnerving it is to go into the kitchen at like 4:30 in the morning and see him on the ceiling?!?

**First Bird Avenger @Hawkeye**

Yeah.

**Iced Americano @CaptainAmerica**

Yes.

**Tired Old Man @BuckyBarnes**

More than once.

**Original Spider @BlackWidow**

You get used to it.

**Better Bird Avenger @Falcon**

I don’t want to get used to it! He was just sitting up in the corner eating dry cereal straight out of the box.

**Friendly Neighborhood @Spiderman**

**@Falcon** Look, I said I was sorry. I didn’t expect anyone else to come in.

**Witchy Woman @ScarletWitch**

**@Spiderman** What is it with you and dry cereal?

**Friendly Neighborhood @Spiderman**

It’s just better that way.

**You Know Who I Am @IronMan**

**@Spiderman** Why were you up at 4:30? You left the lab at like 1:00 and said you were going to sleep.

**Friendly Neighborhood @Spiderman**

And I did. Then I woke up an hour later because I got an idea I just had to work on.

**You Know Who I Am @IronMan**

And this idea couldn’t have waited long enough for you to get an actual night’s sleep?

**Iced Americano @CaptainAmerica**

You have got to be kidding me.

**Tired Old Man @BuckyBarnes**

I can’t believe Tony Stark himself is an actual hypocrite.

**Friendly Neighborhood @Spiderman**

**@CaptainAmerica @BuckyBarnes** I know, right?

**You Know Who I Am @IronMan**

I have no idea what those two popsicles are talking about.

**Original Spider @BlackWidow**

I believe they’re talking about the fact that the pot and the kettle are both, in this case, red and gold.

**First Bird Avenger @Hawkeye**

Leave him alone, guys.

**You Know Who I Am @IronMan**

Thank you, Clint.

**First Bird Avenger @Hawkeye**

He’s just worried about his boyfriend. #IronSpider

**You Know Who I Am @IronMan**

Shut up, Clint.

**Friendly Neighborhood @Spiderman**

Ignoring Clint like usual, **@IronMan** I promise I’ll actually sleep tonight if you do.

**You Know Who I Am @IronMan**

Fine. I guess you’ll just have to spend the night again so I can make sure you get some sleep.

**Friendly Neighborhood @Spiderman**

Tony…

**You Know Who I Am @IronMan**

Good thing your room is ready like always.

**Better Bird Avenger @Falcon**

**@IronMan** Still holding out hope he’ll eventually just never leave, huh?

**You Know Who I Am @IronMan**

**@Falcon** Absolutely.

**Friendly Neighborhood @Spiderman**

**@IronMan** It’s not happening, Tony.

**You Know Who I Am @IronMan**

**@Spiderman** We’ll see.

 

 

**I Hate White Vans @DanielPerez**

I’m starting to think that Hawkeye might be captain of the ship… #IronSpider

**Im Doing My Best @AmIThough**

Don’t get me wrong, I love Spidey, but walking into your kitchen in the middle of the night and just seeing somebody on the ceiling is straight horror movie material.

**It Is What I Think @RebeccaLopez**

**@AmIThough** True, but how many times have they just walked in to find Spidey on the ceiling if they “get used to it”?!?

**I Cant Pick One @AvengersStan**

LMAO at the other Avengers calling Tony on his hypocrisy. Only real family doesn’t hesitate like that.  #AvengersFamily

**Look At All Those Chickens @ImADuck**

Aaaw, it might be hypocritical but he just cares!! #IronSpider #OTP

**Road Work Ahead @NotAConstructionWorker**

Dry cereal _is_ better. Except Cap’n Crunch. That stuff will rip your mouth to pieces.

**Spiderman Replied To Me!!! @SpideyStan1**

Who wants to take bets on when Spidey finally moves into Avengers Tower?

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I am eventually planning to have Peter move into the tower but it's probably gonna happen along with an identity reveal. Yes, I am planning an eventual identity reveal (though I don't know how long until it happens). It should be fun to make all of twitter freak out about that... Do you guys think I should have Peter and the other Avengers tease about a reveal over several chapters so that twitter can slowly lose their minds over it or should Peter just do it with no build up and really shock them?  
> I'm working on another story for this series right now that should shed some light on why Peter's apartment is as bad as it is/why he doesn't get a better one. Also, we'll get to meet Peter's employees AKA his other family! It should hopefully be up within the next few days.


	8. Heads Up, Twitter

**Friendly Neighborhood @Spiderman**

Hey, Twitter, just a heads up: Probably gonna reveal my identity sometime in the next few months.

**Spiderman Replied To Me!!! @SpideyStan1**

What is happening?!? What is- What is-

**Spiderman Replied To Me!!! @SpideyStan1**

_[EverybodyStayCalm.gif](https://www.google.com/search?q=the+office+everybody+stay+calm&rlz=1C1CHBD_enUS720US720&source=lnms&tbm=isch&sa=X&ved=0ahUKEwjbyNWcurHjAhUJbs0KHXAtCksQ_AUIECgB&biw=1600&bih=789#imgrc=nlBr58jPwVr9IM:) _

**More Like Hurricane Tortilla @KatrinaGranger**

_[StayFckingCalm.gif](https://www.google.com/search?q=the+office+everybody+stay+fucking+calm&rlz=1C1CHBD_enUS720US720&source=lnms&tbm=isch&sa=X&ved=0ahUKEwi5ycy-urHjAhUMOs0KHRceAZoQ_AUIESgC&biw=1600&bih=789#imgrc=HLOL1RTYHo6cMM:) _

**Ten Points To Slytherin @Page394**

I swear to Loki if he is screwing with us…

**Bi Bi Bi @ImNotInvisible**

**@Spiderman** Are you screwing with us?!?!?

**Friendly Neighborhood @Spiderman**

I’m serious, guys.

**It Is What I Think @RebeccaLopez**

This is sooo not the abandoned timeline! I am ready! I wanna see the face!

**Look At All Those Chickens @ImADuck**

Does this mean he’s moving into the tower? **@IronMan** Does it?!?

**You Know Who I Am @IronMan**

:)

**Friendly Neighborhood @Spiderman**

:)

**Look At All Those Chickens @ImADuck**

_[MyEmotions.jpg](https://www.google.com/search?q=when+your+otp&rlz=1C1CHBD_enUS720US720&source=lnms&tbm=isch&sa=X&ved=0ahUKEwiww8nYvLHjAhVMUs0KHQAUA_kQ_AUIECgB&biw=1600&bih=789#imgrc=89Ciy0bKiAye3M:) _#OTP #IronSpider

**First Bird Avenger @Hawkeye**

**@Spiderman** You forgot the best part. It’s not happening for a few months, so we all get to spend some time teasing all of the internet with who Spidey really is!

**Better Bird Avenger @Falcon**

Man, he’s gonna be all over the ceilings when he moves in!

**Original Spider @BlackWidow**

**@Falcon** He’s already all over the ceilings.

**Better Bird Avenger @Falcon**

…true.

**You Know Who I Am @IronMan**

**@Falcon** Get over it. He’s moving in. Tomorrow.

**Friendly Neighborhood @Spiderman**

**@IronMan** Tony…

**You Know Who I Am @IronMan**

Fine. **@Falcon** He’s moving in a few months from now.

**Friendly Neighborhood @Spiderman**

**@IronMan** Much better, honey.

**I Cant Pick One @AvengersStan**

They are so cute! Seriously though, they’re not really gonna spend months teasing us with Spidey’s identity, right?

**First Bird Avenger @Hawkeye**

Actually, we’re all looking forward to doing it.

**Better Bird Avenger @Falcon**

rt

**Original Spider @BlackWidow**

rt

**Thunderstruck @Thor**

rt

**The Other Guy @BruceBanner**

rt

**Witchy Woman @ScarletWitch**

rt

**Friggason @Loki**

rt

**Iced Americano @CaptainAmerica**

rt

**Tired Old Man @BuckyBarnes**

rt

**You Know Who I Am @IronMan**

rt

**Friendly Neighborhood @Spiderman**

rt

**I Cant Pick One @AvengersStan**

… there are dark days ahead of us.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Okay, so, I decided on a mix of both. Peter got to shock them all with the announcement that he'll be revealing his identity. Now, they all get to spend some time teasing everybody.  
> Credit goes to Spiderwinter because I really liked their idea of having Peter (and the others) do things like post pictures of Peter's rings, some of his tattoos, etc. I'm definitely gonna have them do some stuff like that!  
> Plus, now that you guys have met the employees (go read Actual Children if you haven't) I might have them start interacting with everybody on Twitter. I'll just have to say that Tony did his tech thing so nobody could trace it to them and, consequentially, to Peter. Let me know if you guys want that and any ideas you have for how to tease Twitter!


	9. And So It Begins

**Witchy Woman @ScarletWitch**

Me and **@Spiderman** are marathoning Lost! I’m still very confused but he insists it will start to make sense eventually…

_[It’s a picture of someone, clearly male, wearing black leggings and an over-sized[red sweatshirt.](https://www.google.com/search?rlz=1C1CHBD_enUS720US720&biw=1600&bih=789&tbm=isch&sa=1&ei=dcEuXZKfNYnRtAak07rYBg&q=iron+man+sweatshirt&oq=iron+man+sweatshirt&gs_l=img.3..35i39j0.7790.9844..9909...0.0..0.100.920.8j2......0....1..gws-wiz-img.......0i67j0i8i30j0i24j0i10i24.D3nPbvFgX4w#imgrc=JDLBJXAVEmWGZM:) He’s curled up on a couch with his hands wrapped around a large mug, sweater paws covering every inch of skin. It’s taken from the neck down so you can’t see his face, just the edge of a sharp jawline.] _

**Friendly Neighborhood @Spiderman**

It will! Just give it a few more episodes.

**Tired Old Man @BuckyBarnes**

**@Spiderman** Don’t lie to her.

**Iced Americano @CaptainAmerica**

**@Spiderman** Yeah, you made us watch the whole show and it still never made sense.

**First Bird Avenger @Hawkeye**

Wait a minute… is that… did Spidey make hot chocolate?!? **@Spiderman**

**Friendly Neighborhood @Spiderman**

…I might have.

**First Bird Avenger @Hawkeye**

And you didn’t tell us you were making it?!?

**Friendly Neighborhood @Spiderman**

You guys all said you were busy!

**Better Bird Avenger @Falcon**

We just didn’t want to watch Lost! We didn’t know there was hot chocolate involved!

**Friendly Neighborhood @Spiderman**

Well, that’s what you get for lying. No hot chocolate for liars.

**Tired Old Man @BuckyBarnes**

I saw Tony heading down to his lab with a mug earlier…

**Friendly Neighborhood @Spiderman**

Tony didn’t lie. He really was busy with a new project. **@IronMan** Right?

**You Know Who I Am @IronMan**

Right, sweetheart. I should be done in a few days. You and I can watch something then.

**Friendly Neighborhood @Spiderman**

Firefly?

**You Know Who I Am @IronMan**

You know me so well.

**Witchy Woman @ScarletWitch**

**@Spiderman** Get off your phone and start the next episode!

**Friendly Neighborhood @Spiderman**

**@ScarletWitch** Yes, ma’am.

 

 

**Spiderman Replied To Me!!! @SpideyStan1**

And so the teasing starts…

**Im Doing My Best @AmIThough**

Is it just me or is there something on his neck? Is that… a tattoo?

**Spiderman Replied To Me!!! @SpideyStan1**

**@AmIThough** Nah, I think it’s just the shadows.

**Im Doing My Best @AmIThough**

**@SpideyStan1** Yeah, you’re probably right.

**Look At All Those Chickens @ImADuck**

Is he seriously wearing an IronMan sweatshirt?!? #IronSpider

**Give Me A D @ImNotAEvenACheerleader**

We can’t even see it all but, WOW, that jawline!

**Bi Bi Bi @ImNotInvisible**

I would happily cut myself on Spidey’s jaw.

**Theres A Bee!!??!! @EthanyWithaB**

Aaw, I love how Spidey and Wanda seem to be such good friends! #AvengersFamily

**Leslie More Like Lesbian @GirlsLoveGirls**

Bucky and Steve are not wrong. I’ve watched Lost multiple times and I still don’t really know what was going on.

**I Cant Pick One @AvengersStan**

This is only the first picture. I am not patient enough for all this teasing. #ShowUsTheFace

**It Is What I Think @RebeccaLopez**

Love that #IronSpider made a date to watch Firefly! Seriously though #ShowUsTheFace

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Yeah, I'm sure it's just the shadows...  
> If I can find pictures online that work for what I'm trying to convey through all their teasing then I'll link them. As it stands, I think most of them will just be descriptions like I did in this chapter.  
> Let me know if you've got any ideas for what they can post to screw with everybody!


	10. The Ring

**Original Spider @BlackWidow**

**@Spiderman** младший брат, I found this under the edge of the couch… _[LoseSomething.jpg](https://www.google.com/search?q=spider+ring&rlz=1C1CHBD_enUS720US720&source=lnms&tbm=isch&sa=X&ved=0ahUKEwiD9_LCqLvjAhWWQs0KHQVaCHEQ_AUIESgC&biw=1600&bih=789#imgrc=x6ucxxckwi2PZM:)_

**Friendly Neighborhood @Spiderman**

You found it! I knew it must have fallen off somewhere! I’ve been looking everywhere for it!

**Original Spider @BlackWidow**

You’ve been feeling off all day, huh?

**Friendly Neighborhood @Spiderman**

Yes! My hand feels so naked without it.

**Iced Americano @CaptainAmerica**

**@Spiderman** Wait, you haven’t been to the tower in two days. How long has your ring been missing?

**Friendly Neighborhood @Spiderman**

Two days.

**Tired Old Man @BuckyBarnes**

Why didn’t you tell us, Spidey? We could have helped look for it.

**Friendly Neighborhood @Spiderman**

I just didn’t want to be a bother.

**Witchy Woman @ScarletWitch**

You’re not a bother! Besides, we all know you love that ring.

**Better Bird Avenger @Falcon**

Yeah, Spidey. Actually, now that I think about it, since learning your ID and seeing you out of the suit, I don’t think I’ve ever seen you without that ring on.

**First Bird Avenger @Hawkeye**

He’s right. I mean, you wear a lot of rings, but you ALWAYS wear that one.

**Friendly Neighborhood @Spiderman**

It’s my favorite. I haven’t taken it off in years.

**You Know Who I Am @IronMan**

**@Spiderman** Really? It’s your favorite?

**Friendly Neighborhood @Spiderman**

**@IronMan** Of course it is, Tony. I mean, how could it not be?

**Iced Americano @CaptainAmerica**

Wait a minute… are you two saying what I think you’re saying?

**Original Spider @BlackWidow**

**@Spiderman** Tony gave you that ring, didn’t he?

**Friendly Neighborhood @Spiderman**

Tony gave me that ring.

**You Know Who I Am @IronMan**

I bought it right after he told me he was Spiderman.

**First Bird Avenger @Hawkeye**

He gave you a ring?!? #IronSpider

**Better Bird Avenger @Falcon**

**@Spiderman @IronMan** How are you two not actually dating?

**Friendly Neighborhood @Spiderman**

**@BlackWidow** I’ll swing by after work to pick it up. It really doesn’t feel right to not be wearing it.

**Tired Old Man @BuckyBarnes**

You guys can’t see him, but Tony’s face is so red right now.

 

**Spiderman Replied To Me!!! @SpideyStan1**

So, Spidey wears a lot of rings? What about other jewelry? #ShowUsTheFace

**Look At All Those Chickens @ImADuck**

He bought him a ring! And he never takes it off! #OTP #IronSpider

**Theres A Bee!!??!! @EthanyWithaB**

I love how they all immediately said they would have helped him look for it because they know it’s important to him. #AvengersFamily

**Leslie More Like Lesbian @GirlsLoveGirls**

I cannot get over the fact that Natasha apparently calls Spidey ‘little brother’.

**Bi Bi Bi @ImNotInvisible**

I swear I’ve seen that ring somewhere before…

**Road Work Ahead @NotAConstructionWorker**

Wow, so Spidey’s not even being subtle, is he? I mean, we may not know who he is under the mask, but apparently, he just walks around wearing a spider ring all the time. What a legend.

**It Is What I Think @RebeccaLopez**

It’s not an engagement ring, but it’s a start! Also, does this mean that Tony knew Spidey before he actually knew he was Spiderman? #IronSpider #ShowUsTheFace

**I Cant Pick One @AvengersStan**

**@RebeccaLopez** Yes, it does! We could figure out how if they would just #ShowUsTheFace

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Let's just say, Bi Bi Bi @ImNotInvisible definitely has at least one tattoo...  
> Let me know if you guys have any ideas about how they can tease everybody!


	11. The Spiderlings

**Pumped Up Kicks @BabySpiderling**

**@Spiderman** Do you know him?

_[It’s a picture of a small, common house spider sitting in a web.]_

**Friendly Neighborhood @Spiderman**

…What are you doing on Twitter?

**Pumped Up Kicks @BabySpiderling**

Asking the important questions. Now, do you know him?

**Friendly Neighborhood @Spiderman**

How many times do I have to tell you that I do not know every spider you happen to see?

**Friendly Neighborhood @Spiderman**

And what if someone traces this account to you?

**Pumped Up Kicks @BabySpiderling**

You worry too much, Chief. **@IronMan** made sure our accounts are untraceable.

**Friendly Neighborhood @Spiderman**

**@IronMan** Anthony Stark…

**Witchy Woman @ScarletWitch**

Oooo, both names…

**You Know Who I Am @IronMan**

**@Spiderman** Yes, sweetheart? My favorite spider? Wonderful person that I would never hurt or even try to inconvenience in any way?

**Friendly Neighborhood @Spiderman**

**@IronMan** Not gonna work. We will be having words later. **@BabySpiderling** Did you say accounts? Plural?

**Pumped Up Kicks @BabySpiderling**

**@FirstSpiderling @SecondSpiderling** Get over here, guys. We’re all in trouble.

**The Responsible One @FirstSpiderling**

Yeah, because of you! **@Spiderman** Sorry, Boss. She wouldn’t take ‘no’ for an answer.

**Hablo Español @SecondSpiderling**

**@Spiderman** It’s true, Boss. She wouldn’t stop until we made the accounts.

**Pumped Up Kicks @BabySpiderling**

Snitches!

**Friendly Neighborhood @Spiderman**

No arguing! **@SecondSpiderling @FirstSpiderling** Don’t worry, I fully believe you two. Also, what is with these names?

**Original Spider @BlackWidow**

They seem appropriate to me.

**Better Bird Avenger @Falcon**

I keep half expecting him to say he’s gonna turn the car around.

**Friendly Neighborhood @Spiderman**

**@Falcon** Shut up, Sam!

**Tired Old Man @BuckyBarnes**

**@Spiderman** So, now that we’ve met your employees on Twitter, when do we get to actually meet them?

**Friendly Neighborhood @Spiderman**

If I’m lucky? Never. I do not need that combined force.

**Pumped Up Kicks @BabySpiderling**

**@Spiderman** Aaaw, but we wanna meet the Avengers! I mean, we’ve already kinda met your boyfriend. #IronSpider

**The Responsible One @FirstSpiderling**

#IronSpider

**Hablo Español @SecondSpiderling**

#IronSpider

**Friendly Neighborhood @Spiderman**

We’re not dating!

**You Know Who I Am @IronMan**

We are just friends!

**First Bird Avenger @Hawkeye**

Oh yeah, I wanna meet them…

 

 

**Ten Points To Slytherin @Page394**

Well, they’re right about Tony hiding them. You can’t even go to their accounts.

**Give Me A D @ImNotAEvenACheerleader**

So, Spidey has employees? Like, he’s THE boss? What does he do? #ShowUsTheFace

**I Know How To Pronounce My State @ItShouldBeArKansas**

There seems to be only three of them. Small business? #ShowUsTheface

**Spiderman Replied To Me!!! @SpideyStan1**

I love that they call themselves ‘spiderlings’! I also love that Tony knew he was in trouble and immediately started flattering Spidey! #SpiderDad #IronSpider

**Goodbye Lucy @LucilleSanders**

Okay, but the fact that Spidey automatically knew who it was because they asked if he knew a random spider? Amazing.

**I Hate White Vans @DanielPerez**

Great. Now I wanna know who these people are too. #ShowUsTheFace

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Poor Peter. The spiderlings give him so many headaches. They probably won't be showing up on Twitter too much, but they'll occasionally be in a chapter. Also, I realize that Thor, Bruce, and Loki don't show up very often. That's because it can get a bit complicated to have everybody posting. The way I see it, those three just don't spend quite as much time on Twitter because they're busy doing their thing in Norway.  
> P.S. 'Pumped Up Kicks' is definitely a reference to Sara's beloved heelys.


	12. We're Taking A Vote

**Tired Old Man @BuckyBarnes**

Alright, Twitter. We’re taking a vote. Spidey’s Ass or America’s Ass?

_[It’s a side by side picture of two people with their backs to the camera. One is clearly Steve Rogers. He’s wearing joggers and a white t-shirt, standing in front of a punching bag. The other, presumably Spiderman, is wearing a pair of tight jeans and a red flannel shirt. He’s in a kitchen and leaning on the counter in front of him, standing on his tiptoes to reach into the cabinet above. His messy brown curls are clearly visible.]_

**Iced Americano @CaptainAmerica**

Bucky! What are you doing?

**Tired Old Man @BuckyBarnes**

Sam bet me I wouldn’t do it. So, ha! **@Falcon** You owe me 10$.

**Better Bird Avenger @Falcon**

Fine. It’ll be worth it when Tony comes after you for posting Spidey’s ass for everyone to see.

**Friendly Neighborhood @Spiderman**

**@BuckyBarnes** Why do you even have these pictures?

**Tired Old Man @BuckyBarnes**

Well, I have the Steve picture because I like to look at him. I have the other picture because I think it’s funny when you struggle to reach things.

**Friendly Neighborhood @Spiderman**

You know, it’s not like I’m the shortest. I’m taller than both Wanda and Natasha.

**Original Spider @BlackWidow**

Yeah, but we wear heels a lot.

**Friendly Neighborhood @Spiderman**

It’s not my fault you guys cheat!

**Witchy Woman @ScarletWitch**

It’s not cheating when you could wear heels too.

**Friendly Neighborhood @Spiderman**

No, thank you. My feet hurt just looking at some of the shoes you two wear.

**First Bird Avenger @Hawkeye**

Okay, but where is Tony? He should be all over this.

**Tired Old Man @BuckyBarnes**

Yeah, where is he? Should I be hiding?

**Iced Americano @CaptainAmerica**

I think you’re safe. He’s been in the lab for a while. He probably hasn’t even looked at Twitter.

**First Bird Avenger @Hawkeye**

**@IronMan** Tony, you alive, man?

**You Know Who I Am @IronMan**

Yes, I’m alive. I’m also busy. What do you want?

**Better Bird Avenger @Falcon**

**@IronMan** Scroll up.

**You Know Who I Am @IronMan**

**@BuckyBarnes** Why do you have a picture of Spidey’s ass?!?

**Original Spider @BlackWidow**

**@IronMan** Did you even read the text? Or did you just see the picture and know it was Spidey right away?

**You Know Who I Am @IronMan**

I know that fine ass anywhere.

**Friendly Neighborhood @Spiderman**

Tony!

**You Know Who I Am @IronMan**

**@Spiderman** I’m only speaking the truth. Also, don’t worry about your height, sweetheart. You’re adorable.

**Witchy Woman @ScarletWitch**

Wow. You’re being even more obvious than usual.

**Friendly Neighborhood @Spiderman**

**@ScarletWitch** There’s a reason for that. **@IronMan** How long have you been awake?

**You Know Who I Am @IronMan**

I don’t know. What’s today?

**Friendly Neighborhood @Spiderman**

Honey, go to bed. You need to get some sleep.

**You Know Who I Am @IronMan**

One more hour.

**Friendly Neighborhood @Spiderman**

Sleep. Now.

**You Know Who I Am @IronMan**

Fine. I’ll go to bed.

**Friendly Neighborhood @Spiderman**

Thank you. I’ll come by later to make sure you’re actually sleeping.

**You Know Who I Am @IronMan**

**@Spiderman** You know the door is always open for you, sweetheart.

 

**Look At All Those Chickens @ImADuck**

My shipper heart can NOT take this! I mean, Tony knows his ass as soon as he sees it then they turn around and act so sweet!?! #OTP #IronSpider

**Leslie More Like Lesbian @GirlsLoveGirls**

“I like to look at him” I’m gay and I agree with that statement. I mean, damn. #AmericasAss #Stucky

**More Like Hurricane Tortilla @KatrinaGranger**

The curls! He really is like a miniature poodle! #ShowUsTheFace

**I Cant Pick One @AvengersStan**

Have you guys checked the poll? Spidey’s winning and I can’t argue but Cap still makes a pretty picture. That shoulder to waist ratio… #CaptainDorito

**It Is What I Think @RebeccaLopez**

Look at that ass! Are jeans even allowed to be that tight? Now if we could just see his face… #SpideysAss #ShowUsTheFace

**In Front Of My Salad!!! @IDon’tEvenLikeSalad**

Aaaw, Tony got so protective over Bucky having that picture! #IronSpider

**Theres A Bee!!??!! @EthanyWithaB**

Door’s always open, huh? Is that a bedroom door? ;) #IronSpider #ShowUsTheFace

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Credit goes to RulerOfThePandas for this idea.  
> In my mind, Peter is the shortest guy on the team. Tom Holland is 5'8 so this is pretty much true. Technically, Mark Ruffalo is the same height but I like to imagine that everybody, except the girls, is at least two inches taller than Peter. And they never let him forget it. One of Sam and Bucky's favorite things to do is try and make Peter stand next to Loki or Thor when they visit because they're the tallest.  
> Let me know if you guys have any ideas for how they can screw with everybody on Twitter!


	13. Loki Gets Abandoned

**Friggason @Loki**

I brought Sophia with me to visit Avengers Tower and she immediately abandoned me for Spidey.

_[It’s a picture of someone, presumably Spiderman, smiling with his head turned to the side and his eyes scrunched closed as Sophia rubs her head against his cheek. The angle means you can’t actually see his face, but the now familiar brown curls are easy to see. You can also see a small silver hoop in his earlobe with a red stud above it and a blue stud above that.]_

**Friendly Neighborhood @Spiderman**

**@Loki** I’m sorry your cat likes me so much.

**First Bird Avenger @Hawkeye**

You are not.

**Tired Old Man @BuckyBarnes**

Liar.

**Better Bird Avenger @Falcon**

You haven’t put her down since they got here.

**Friendly Neighborhood @Spiderman**

…yeah, I’m not sorry. She’s so cuddly!

**Friggason @Loki**

**@Spiderman** I’m sure I shall get over this betrayal eventually.

**Witchy Woman @ScarletWitch**

I want one. **@IronMan**

**Tired Old Man @BuckyBarnes**

Me too. **@IronMan**

**Iced Americano @CaptainAmerica**

I don’t think it would hurt anything to have a cat around the tower. **@IronMan**

**You Know Who I Am @IronMan**

**@ScarletWitch @BuckyBarnes** No! There will be no animals in this tower. **@CaptainAmerica** And _you_ are literally only agreeing because Bucky wants one.

**Iced Americano @CaptainAmerica**

**@IronMan** Yes. I am.

**Tired Old Man @BuckyBarnes**

**@CaptainAmerica** Thank you, Steve.

**Original Spider @BlackWidow**

**@Spiderman** When are you telling everyone who you are and moving into the tower?

**Friendly Neighborhood @Spiderman**

Still a few months from now. Why?

**Original Spider @BlackWidow**

Who wants to bet that at least one animal moves into the tower right after Spidey does?

**First Bird Avenger @Hawkeye**

Ha! That’s a sucker’s bet and you know it.

**Better Bird Avenger @Falcon**

Man, we all know it.

**You Know Who I Am @IronMan**

I don’t know what you’re talking about.

**Friendly Neighborhood @Spiderman**

**@IronMan** You know, I have spent years in an apartment that doesn’t allow pets…

**You Know Who I Am @Spiderman**

**@Spiderman** …we’ll see, sweetheart.

**Witchy Woman @ScarletWitch**

That means yes.

**First Bird Avenger @Hawkeye**

Tony is so whipped. #IronSpider

 

 

**Spiderman Replied To Me!!! @SpideyStan1**

The earrings! The curls! The cat! This picture is just all around a masterpiece. If only it included a whole face… #ShowUsTheFace

**Road Work Ahead @NotAConstructionWorker**

Once again, he’s not even being subtle! He walks around wearing not only a spider ring but earrings in his own colors! The man is a legend.

**Ten Points To Slytherin @Page394**

Aw yes, I am so happy to see Sophia again. My new favorite Avenger right there.

**Goodbye Lucy @LucilleSanders**

Somebody please get Bucky and Wanda a cat!

**Theres A Bee!!??!! @EthanyWithaB**

**@LucilleSanders** Don’t worry, I’m sure Spidey’s got them as soon as he moves in.

**Look At All Those Chickens @ImADuck**

Tony is absolutely whipped and it’s adorable! #IronSpider

**It Is What I Think @RebeccaLopez**

Let’s be real here, it’s not just Tony that’s whipped. Steve definitely is too. #IronSpider #Stucky #ShowUsTheFace

**I Cant Pick One @AvengersStan**

Someone please explain why I love the fact that Spidey’s ears are pierced so much?!? What if he has more?!? I really need to see a face! #ShowUsTheFace

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So now they know his ears are pierced...  
> Let me know if you guys have any ideas for how else they can screw with Twitter!


	14. Someone Save Tony

**First Bird Avenger @Hawkeye**

_[It’s a video of Natasha and Spiderman in what seems to be a private dance studio. Natasha’s wearing a black leotard and black tights with classic pink ballet shoes, her hair pulled up. Spidey’s wearing black leggings and a light gray hoodie with red and blue ballet shoes. The two of them are dancing in perfect sync and look like they should be on a stage in front of thousands. The camera slowly pans to show Tony, who is watching with bright red cheeks, a look of unfiltered awe and adoration on his face. There’s no doubt which dancer his eyes are on.]_

**Better Bird Avenger @Falcon**

Wow. I mean, I knew they could dance, but…wow.

**Witchy Woman @ScarletWitch**

Yes! Look at my best friends go!

**Tired Old Man @BuckyBarnes**

LMAO. Look at poor Tony.

**Iced Americano @CaptainAmerica**

**@BuckyBarnes** Don’t be mean.

**First Bird Avenger @Hawkeye**

**@BuckyBarnes** He didn’t say a word the whole time they were dancing. I don’t think he was even breathing. #IronSpider

**You Know Who I Am @IronMan**

Lies and slander.

**Better Bird Avenger @Falcon**

Are you really gonna deny it when we have video evidence?

**You Know Who I Am @IronMan**

…I plead the fifth.

**Friendly Neighborhood @Spiderman**

Oh.

**Iced Americano @CaptainAmerica**

**@Spiderman** You alright, Spidey?

**Original Spider @BlackWidow**

**@Spiderman** You honestly didn’t notice how he was looking at you, did you младший брате?

**Friendly Neighborhood @Spiderman**

…I plead the fifth.

**Tired Old Man @BuckyBarnes**

You have got to be kidding me.

**Witchy Woman @Scarlet Witch**

They really are perfect for each other.

**You Know Who I Am @IronMan**

**@Spiderman** You were beautiful, sweetheart.

**Friendly Neighborhood @Spiderman**

**@IronMan** Thank you, honey.

**Original Spider @BlackWidow**

Spidey’s cheeks are redder than his suit right now.

 

 

**Spiderman Replied To Me!!! @SpideyStan1**

Oh. My. God. This is one of the best things I’ve ever seen! Yet somehow, we still can’t see who he is… #ShowUsTheFace

**Hello Darkness @MyOldFriend**

Tony has definitely messed with this video. Any time you try to pause it and zoom in on his face it just gets blurrier and blurrier. He’s protecting his boy! #ShowUsTheFace #IronSpider

**Look At All Those Chickens @ImADuck**

The way Tony is looking at him… #IronSpider #OTP

**Winter Never Left @AstridHaugen**

As a ballerina, I just- I can’t- oh my- _[ItsSoBeautiful.gif](https://www.google.com/search?rlz=1C1CHBD_enUS720US720&biw=1600&bih=789&tbm=isch&sxsrf=ACYBGNRK-_8d0v6RKNsM5ErHuqYivpFTCg%3A1570853159599&sa=1&ei=J1GhXYuhJOfD_QbqxrSICQ&q=so+beautiful+gif&oq=so+beautiful+gif&gs_l=img.3..0l2j0i5i30l8.361.361..951...0.0..0.151.151.0j1......0....1..gws-wiz-img.gDIbLCKUrf8&ved=0ahUKEwjL0MmE7JXlAhXnYd8KHWojDZEQ4dUDCAc&uact=5#imgrc=60IH1dfdVadv7M)_

**Theres A Bee!!??!! @EthanyWithaB**

“Look at my best friends go!” Spidey, Natasha, and Wanda are the trio I didn’t know I needed!

**I Hate White Vans @DanielPerez**

Pleading the fifth rather than admit to something. Big Mood. #IronSpider

**Im Doing My Best @AmIThough**

I just wanna know who he is!!! #ShowUsTheFace

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Credit goes to KarateGirl0001 for Hello Darkness @MyOldFriend.  
> Credit goes to stained_glass_heart for the dancing idea.  
> I couldn't find a video to tag that really showed what I was imagining but you guys can always go to Youtube and look at ballet videos yourselves. Pick your favorite and imagine that's the dance they're doing.  
> Let me know what you guys thought and any ideas you have for how else they can tease everyone!


	15. Place Your Bets

**The Other Guy @BruceBanner**

Place your bets.

_[It’s a picture of two locked hands, ready to arm wrestle. One clearly belongs to Thor as you can see Mjolnir on his broad forearm. The other person, presumably Spidey, is wearing a blue flannel shirt so you can’t see any skin on his arm. Thor’s hand is big enough that it mostly covers Spidey’s, but you can clearly tell that there’s some kind of ink on his hand and fingers; you just can’t tell what it is. He’s not wearing his rings and his dark nail polish is chipped.]_

**Better Bird Avenger @Falcon**

My money’s on Spidey.

**First Bird Avenger @Hawkeye**

**@Falcon** Seriously, man? I know Spidey’s strong, but Thor is literally a god.

**Better Bird Avenger @Falcon**

We’ve seen Spidey catch moving vehicles with no problem. Why would I not bet on him?

**Iced Americano @CaptainAmerica**

**@Hawkeye** Technically, he’s an alien.

**Tired Old Man @BuckyBarnes**

**@CaptainAmerica** That may be true, but he’s not known as the Alien of Thunder. He’s known as the God of Thunder.

**Original Spider @BlackWidow**

I’m staying out of this one.

**Witchy Woman @ScarletWitch**

Me too. I mean, they’re both way too strong to really believe anyway.

**You Know Who I Am @IronMan**

Why is this even a question? Obviously, Spidey is gonna win.

**The Other Guy @Brucebanner**

**@IronMan** What do you mean obviously? Yeah, Spidey’s strong, but he’s not Thor.

**You Know Who I Am @IronMan**

**@BruceBanner** Don’t underestimate him just because he’s small.

**The Other Guy @BruceBanner**

**@IronMan** I’m not, but Thor has held his own against Hulk on multiple occasions!

**You Know Who I Am @IronMan**

**@BruceBanner** We’ve tested Spidey’s strength in the lab! We had to stop after 10 tons because that’s all I had!

**Iced Americano @CaptainAmerica**

**@Spiderman** You can lift 10 tons? Maybe more?

**Friendly Neighborhood @Spiderman**

Yeah.

**Thunderstruck @Thor**

That is truly impressive, Spidey! Especially for a mortal.

**First Bird Avenger @Hawkeye**

**@Spiderman** But you’re so small?

**Friendly Neighborhood @Spiderman**

I mean, a radioactive spider bit me. What are you gonna do?

**The Other Guy @BruceBanner**

**@Spiderman** What else did the bite do? How much have you tested?

**Friendly Neighborhood @Spiderman**

I did every test I could possibly think of after I was bitten.

**You Know Who I Am @IronMan**

You know, we’ve talked about things, but I never have gotten to see all that data…

**Friendly Neighborhood @Spiderman**

**@IronMan** I’ll collect all the data and bring it by the lab for you, honey. You and **@BruceBanner** can both take a look.

**Witchy Woman @ScarletWitch**

They just high-fived. They look as excited as little kids in a candy shop.

**Original Spider @BlackWidow**

Mention science and all arguments about who has a stronger boyfriend stop. #ScienceBros

 

 

**Spiderman Replied To Me!!! @SpideyStan1**

Spidey’s hand is tattooed?!? I can’t make out what it is… #ShowUsTheFace

**Im Doing My Best @AmIThough**

**@SpideyStan1** Remember that first picture Wanda posted? I don’t think that was a shadow on his neck… #ShowUsTheFace

**Give Me A D @ImNotAEvenACheerleader**

Bruce and Tony defending their boyfriends’ strength gives me life! #IronSpider #Thruce

**Look At All Those Chickens @ImADuck**

I love how Spidey doesn’t even question giving Tony (and Bruce) all that data about him/his powers! #IronSpider #ScienceBros

**Hello Darkness @MyOldFriend**

The tattoo(s)! The nail polish! I love everything about this!

**Leslie More Like Lesbian @GirlsLoveGirls**

Yes, I love that Spidey’s nails are painted, but he needs to clean that up. Look at all those chips!

**Bi Bi Bi @ImNotInvisible**

Listen. I know #IronSpider is THE ship but I’m calling it now: Spidey is bi. That’s the only explanation for all the flannel shirts he apparently owns and wears.

**I Cant Pick One @AvengersStan**

He has tattoos on his hand. He might have one on his neck. Guys, I think I know why he’s always wearing long sleeves in all the pictures… #ShowUsTheFace

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> They know his hand is tattooed and they think there's more...  
> By the way, the flannel shirt thing is just me being self-aware. I love them so much. I own so (too) many.  
> Let me know what you guys thought and any ideas you have for what else they can post!


	16. How many...

**I’ve Got A @WeirdQuestion**

**@Spiderman** Which Avengers have tattoos? How many?

**Friendly Neighborhood @Spiderman**

**@WeirdQuestion** …yeah, I was kinda expecting this one. I’ll tell everybody to answer.

**Thunderstruck @Thor**

I have one that you have all seen.

**Original Spider @BlackWidow**

I have one.

**Iced Americano @CaptainAmerica**

I have one.

**Tired Old Man @BuckyBarnes**

**@CaptainAmerica** Same.

**Witchy Woman @ScarletWitch**

I think you all have seen the one I have on my calf.

**Better Bird Avenger @Falcon**

**@IronMan @Spiderman** Well? You two are oddly silent…

**First Bird Avenger @Hawkeye**

**@IronMan @Spiderman** Yeah, fess up.

**You Know Who I Am @IronMan**

Fine. I have one.

**Tired Old Man @BuckyBarnes**

**@IronMan** You have one that none of us have ever seen.

**First Bird Avenger @Hawkeye**

**@Spiderman** Spidey? We’re waiting.

**Friendly Neighborhood @Spiderman**

…I have some.

**Iced Americano @CaptainAmerica**

Is ‘some’ what you’re going with?

**Friendly Neighborhood @Spiderman**

…there’s no need to get into specifics.

**Better Bird Avenger @Falcon**

Man, I can not wait until he finally reveals his identity.

 

 

**I’ve Got A @WeirdQuestion**

‘Some’, huh? #ShowUsTheFace #ShowUsTheInk

**Spiderman Replied To Me!!! @SpideyStan1**

That was definitely not a shadow on his neck… #ShowUsTheFace #ShowUsTheInk

**Im Doing My Best @AmIThough**

**@SpideyStan1** I know!!! What do you think the tattoo is? #ShowUsTheFace #ShowUsTheInk

**I Cant Pick One @AvengersStan**

How many does he have?!? #ShowUsTheInk

**Look At All Those Chickens @ImADuck**

So, Tony has a tattoo they’ve never seen. Who wants to bet Spidey’s seen it? #IronSpider

**Leslie More Like Lesbian @GirlsLoveGirls**

The Black Widow has a tattoo… I’m okay. I’m fine. I’m not screaming or anything.

**Bi Bi Bi @ImNotInvisible**

So, if Spidey’s (apparently) got a lot of tattoos… and that’s probably why we always see him with long sleeves… what does he do when he’s not in the suit? #ShowUsTheFace #ShowUsTheInk

**Hello Darkness @MyOldFriend**

**@Falcon** I, too, can not wait for the reveal. #ShowUsTheFace

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I mean, 'some' is technically not inaccurate...  
> Also, did you catch Bucky responding to Steve saying he has one with 'same'? Ha! I make myself laugh. If only the public knew that was literal...  
> I love writing this story, but it's also kind of odd for me to do. I've gotten to the point where I post a chapter then I'm like 'I wonder what they're gonna do next? When is Spidey finally gonna reveal his identity?' followed by 'oh, duh, that's up to me'.  
> Let me know what you thought and any ideas you might have for how to tease Twitter!


	17. We're Going Big Now

**Better Bird Avenger @Falcon**

I am not prepared for this to become an even more regular thing when he moves in.

_[It’s a picture of Spiderman with his feet planted on the ceiling, hanging upside down and rummaging through a kitchen cabinet, the open door hiding his face. He’s wearing faded jeans and a black hoodie. Gravity is pulling his hoodie and shirt down which means you can clearly see that there’s a colorful tattoo down the side of his ribcage. It’s a beautiful collection of flowers: lilies, roses, daisies, mayflowers, poppies, and more.]_

**First Bird Avenger @Hawkeye**

**@Spiderman** Oh, we’re going big now? You must be close to that reveal.

**Tired Old Man @BuckyBarnes**

**@Spiderman** I love that this is your solution to being short.

**Friendly Neighborhood @Spiderman**

**@BuckyBarnes** Shut up, Bucky! **@Hawkeye** Yeah, we’re getting close.

**Original Spider @BlackWidow**

We actually haven’t seen this one before.

**Witchy Woman @ScarletWitch**

Yeah, we’ve only really seen your arms and some of your chest.

**Friendly Neighborhood @Spiderman**

I mean, unless you see me basically naked, you’ll never see all of them, so…

**Iced Americano @CaptainAmerica**

No offense but no thanks, Spidey.

**Better Bird Avenger @Falcon**

Yeah, I’m sure most of us will pass. Emphasis on _most_ of us. **@IronMan**

**You Know Who I Am @IronMan**

**@Falcon** Shut up, Sam. **@Spiderman** This is one of my favorites.

**Friendly Neighborhood @Spiderman**

**@IronMan** I have noticed that you tend to favor color over black and whites.

**You Know Who I Am @IronMan**

**@Spiderman** Don’t get me wrong, I love all of them. They’re all a part of you, sweetheart.

**Witchy Woman @ScarletWitch**

Spidey’s not even here right now, but I know he’s completely red.

**First Bird Avenger @Hawkeye**

Honestly, at this point it’s just getting ridiculous. #IronSpider

**Tired Old Man @BuckyBarnes**

**@Hawkeye** It really is. #IronSpider

 

 

**Spiderman Replied To Me!!! @SpideyStan1**

Oh. My. God. It’s absolutely beautiful! If he’d have to be basically naked to see them all then he must be covered! #ShowUsTheFace

**Look At All Those Chickens @ImADuck**

Sooo, how many has Tony seen? #IronSpider

**Hello Darkness @MyOldFriend**

“Yeah, we’re getting close.” I’m fine. I’m fine. I’m not nearly hyperventilating or anything. #ShowUsTheFace

**Winter Never Left @AstridHaugen**

I love how all the other Avengers are, at this point, completely done with Tony and Spidey. #IronSpider

**Bi Bi Bi @ImNotInvisible**

Someone please explain why I love the fact that Spidey is apparently covered in tattoos so much?!? #ShowUsTheFace

**Theres A Bee!!??!! @EthanyWithaB**

Guys, I just- I can’t wait for the reveal! I just _know_ that he’s pretty, you know? #ShowUsTheFace

**Goodbye Lucy @LucilleSanders**

**@EthanyWithaB** I know! We haven’t even seen his face, but I just feel like pretty is the right word! #ShowUsTheFace

 

 

**You Know Who I Am @IronMan**

**@LucilleSanders** It is.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Like Spidey said, we're getting close guys!  
> Don't worry about the artist recognizing him from the tattoo or anything. The flowers are definitely Monique's work.  
> Let me know what you guys thought and any ideas you might have!


	18. Godly Headaches

**Thunderstruck @Thor**

I live in Norway and I still get headaches dealing with how oblivious these two are.

_[It’s a side picture of Tony and Spidey. Tony is sitting on a couch with a tablet in one hand, gesturing with the other. Spidey is leaning over the back of the couch with his arms wrapped around Tony’s shoulders, seemingly nodding along with whatever Tony’s saying. He’s wearing a black and gray flannel shirt with the sleeves rolled up to his elbows. The angle means you can clearly see the ink covering his arms but it’s not close enough to make out exactly what it is.]_

**The Other Guy @BruceBanner**

He’s not wrong.

**Tired Old Man @BuckyBarnes**

**@Thor @BruceBanner** You’re not the ones that are gonna have to _literally_ live with it.

**Friggason @Loki**

If you would just take my suggestion, we could fix this.

**Thunderstruck @Thor**

**@Loki** I told you we are not doing that.

**Witchy Woman @ScarletWitch**

Wait, what was his suggestion?

**The Other Guy @BruceBanner**

He wanted to hit them with some kind of truth spell and lock them in a room together.

**First Bird Avenger @Hawkeye**

I’m game. I mean, they sat like that for _way_ too long to be so oblivious.

**Better Bird Avenger @Falcon**

Yeah. Let’s do it. We can finally end all our suffering.

**Friggason @Loki**

**@Thor @BruceBanner** See? They approve.

**Iced Americano @CaptainAmerica**

Yeah… we’re not gonna do that. **@Loki** I feel like there are a lot of moral issues with basically drugging them to confess.

**Friggason @Loki**

Well, I mean, if you’re gonna worry about things like _morals_ then, yeah, it’s not the best idea…

**Original Spider @BlackWidow**

Don’t worry, boys. I have a feeling it won’t be too much longer until they figure things out…

**First Bird Avenger @Hawkeye**

Well, that’s a little ominous.

**Witchy Woman @ScarletWitch**

Wait, where even are they? They should be stammering out their denials by now.

**Iced Americano @CaptainAmerica**

**@ScarletWitch** They’re at Spidey’s apartment packing.

**Tired Old Man @BuckyBarnes**

Wow, I guess the reveal is soon, huh?

 

 

**Look At All Those Chickens @ImADuck**

Look at them!!! And he’s helping him pack?!? Spidey’s moving in!!!  #OTP #IronSpider

**Bi Bi Bi @ImNotInvisible**

The arms! I can’t make out what it is, and it won’t let me zoom… Tony has definitely messed with this picture. #IronSpider #ShowUsTheFace

**I Cant Pick One @AvengersStan**

Guys, if he’s packing and moving in, then the reveal really is soon!!! #ShowUsTheFace

**Give Me A D @ImNotAEvenACheerleader**

It is happening people!! Now, the question remains: will he be getting his own room or sharing Tony’s? #IronSpider #ShowUsTheFace

**I Hate White Vans @DanielPerez**

**@ImNotAEvenACheerleader** More than likely his own room. I mean, they still seem very deep in denial. #IronSpider

**Ten Points To Slytherin @Page394**

“I mean, if you’re gonna worry about things like _morals_ ” I stan Loki so much! That is just such a Mood™.

**More Like Hurricane Tortilla @KatrinaGranger**

A moment of silence for the suffering of the Avengers who must watch those oblivious dorks from up close and personal. #IronSpider

**It Is What I Think @RebeccaLopez**

I can’t wait to see his face and his tattoos!! #ShowUsTheFace #ShowUsTheInk

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Just a couple more chapters before the reveal, guys...  
> Let me know what you guys thought and any ideas you might have!


	19. A Name

**Iced Americano @CaptainAmerica**

Well, Peter’s all moved in and I don’t know if I’ve ever seen Tony so happy.

_[It’s a picture of Tony leaning back against the kitchen island, grinning wide. Though you can’t actually see what he’s looking at, there’s no doubt that it’s Spidey.]_

**Better Bird Avenger @Falcon**

Woah, we’re using his name now?

**Tired Old Man @BuckyBarnes**

**@Spiderman** Just how close is the big reveal?

**Friendly Neighborhood @Spiderman**

:)

**First Bird Avenger @Hawkeye**

I know who he is and I’m still excited!

**Witchy Woman @ScarletWitch**

Uh, guys? Does anyone know what Tony’s up to?

**Iced Americano @CaptainAmerica**

**@ScarletWitch** What do you mean, Wanda?

**Witchy Woman @ScarletWitch**

He just jumped up all of a sudden and said he had to go get something. **@Spiderman** Peter, what’s he doing?

**Friendly Neighborhood @Spiderman**

For once, I have no idea. He said something about a ‘housewarming’ gift and told me not to move.

**Original Spider @BlackWidow**

**@Spiderman** If it’s what I think it is, you’re gonna love it. **@BuckyBarnes @ScarletWitch** So are you two.

**First Bird Avenger @Hawkeye**

I’m not even surprised that Natasha apparently knows what’s going on.

**Tired Old Man @BuckyBarnes**

He didn’t…

**Better Bird Avenger @Falcon**

Wow. That was even quicker than I thought he’d cave.

 

 

**Spiderman Replied To Me!!! @SpideyStan1**

We have a name!! This is not a drill, people. I repeat, we have a name!! #ShowUsTheFace

**Goodbye Lucy @LucilleSanders**

He got him (Peter!) a cat, didn’t he?!? As soon as he moved in?!? #IronSpider

**Hello Darkness @MyOldFriend**

*frantically searches how many men named Peter live in New York City*

**Leslie More Like Lesbian @GirlsLoveGirls**

I love how nobody questions that Natasha just _knows_ what’s going on. Also, we have a name!! #ShowUsTheFace

**It Is What I Think @RebeccaLopez**

He’s moved in!!! That reveal has got to be any day now… #ShowUsTheFace

**I Know How To Pronounce My State @ItShouldBeArKansas**

I swear, if Spidey (Peter!) posts a picture of a cat I am gonna cry! #IronSpider #ShowUsTheFace

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> They have a name! The reveal is imminent, people.   
> What could Tony possibly have gotten him? It is just such a mystery....  
> Let me know what you thought and if you have any ideas!


	20. Meet Jenny

**Friendly Neighborhood @Spiderman**

**@IronMan** Thank you, honey! Everybody meet Jenny!

_[It’s a picture of a fluffy[calico cat ](https://www.google.com/search?q=long+haired+calico+cat&rlz=1C1CHBD_enUS720US720&source=lnms&tbm=isch&sa=X&ved=0ahUKEwiLhr_F2czjAhWhct8KHWbCDlkQ_AUIESgB&biw=1600&bih=789#imgrc=qrMPkCluU5Xe2M:)laying on somebody’s crossed legs. They’re wearing tight jeans and a pair of flowery [Doc Martens.](https://www.google.com/search?rlz=1C1CHBD_enUS720US720&biw=1600&bih=789&tbm=isch&sa=1&ei=vUkTXaeRE4_ctQaI1qeIDQ&q=floral+doc+martens&oq=floral+doc+martens&gs_l=img.3..0i67j0j0i7i30l5j0i8i30l3.20981.21756..21906...0.0..0.99.183.2......0....1..gws-wiz-img.q6OCq7TWnPw#imgrc=HgWtYchgw4S5gM) Jenny has her eyes closed as the person she’s laying on, obviously Peter, rubs down her back. You can clearly see the silver rings on his fingers and the red rose, with golden edges, on the back of his hand.]_

**You Know Who I Am @IronMan**

**@Spiderman** You’re welcome, sweetheart.

**Witchy Woman @ScarletWitch**

She’s so cute!!

**Tired Old Man @BuckyBarnes**

**@Spiderman** Peter, you should have moved in way sooner.

**First Bird Avenger @Hawkeye**

**@IronMan** You are so whipped! He hasn’t even been living in the tower for a full day yet!

**You Know Who I Am @IronMan**

**@Hawkeye** Shut up, Clint.

**Better Bird Avenger @Falcon**

That doesn’t really work when you’re still bright red from the hug Peter gave you when he saw the cat.

**Iced Americano @CaptainAmerica**

**@Hawkeye @Falcon** Leave him alone you two.

**Original Spider @BlackWidow**

**@Hawkeye @Falcon** Yeah, don’t act like you two weren’t cooing over #IronSpider when it happened.

**You Know Who I Am @IronMan**

**@BlackWidow** That’s not really helping, Nat.

**Friggason @Loki**

**@Spiderman** I shall have to bring Sophia to visit again so they can meet.

**Friendly Neighborhood @Spiderman**

**@Loki** Yes! Kitty playdate!

**Witchy Woman @ScarletWitch**

This is the best timeline!

**Tired Old Man @BuckyBarnes**

**@ScarletWitch** It really is.

**Iced Americano @CaptainAmerica**

**@IronMan** It’s a good thing you got him a female cat otherwise I have a feeling we’d be overrun with kittens within the year.

**You Know Who I Am @IronMan**

**@CaptainAmerica** That’s why I made sure to get a female.

 

 

**I Know How To Pronounce My State @ItShouldBeArKansas**

I was right. I am crying. He got him a cat!! #IronSpider

**Paws and More @QueensAnimalShelter**

We knew what was happening as soon as **@IronMan** came in. Jenny was actually a stray that **@Spiderman** himself brought in last week. We know she’ll have a good home at Avengers Tower!

**In Front Of My Salad!!! @IDon’tEvenLikeSalad**

“kitty playdate” He is such a cinnamon roll!!!

**More Like Hurricane Tortilla @KatrinaGranger**

That rose is so pretty!! And very distinctive I’m sure… #ShowUsTheFace

**Look At All Those Chickens @ImADuck**

That rose is red and gold!! I repeat, it is red and gold!!! #IronSpider

**Ten Points To Slytherin @Page394**

I, for one, would love to see Sophia and Jenny together.

**Bi Bi Bi @ImNotInvisible**

Oh. My. God. I know those boots and that tattoo…

**I Cant Pick One @AvengersStan**

**@ImNotInvisible** What?!? You know who he is?!? Tell us! #ShowUsTheFace

**Bi Bi Bi @ImNotInvisible**

**@AvengersStan** No, I’m gonna let him handle his reveal. I just- oh my- he’s a- I got- I knew I recognized that spider ring from somewhere!

**It Is What I Think @RebeccaLopez**

**@ImNotInvisible** You hold such knowledge. Are you okay? #ShowUsTheFace

**Bi Bi Bi @ImNotInvisible**

**@RebeccaLopez** You’ll understand my shock after the reveal.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Much like in Sophia's chapter, Jenny only just started existing and I would already die for her.  
> Like I said, Bi Bi Bi @ImNotInvisible definitely has some tattoos...  
> Guys, the reveal is next. I am so excited! Also, I've already started writing the story where Peter and Tony finally get together but I know it doesn't happen until post-reveal. I know how I want it to happen, I've just got to figure out how to actually write it all down so it flows right. By the way, I made a playlist for Starker that I've been listening to while I try to write that story. Tell me if you guys think I should link the playlist whenever I post that story.  
> Let me know what you guys thought and any ideas you have!


	21. Peter Parker

**You Know Who I Am @IronMan**

Twitter, let me introduce you to Peter Parker AKA **@Spiderman**

_[It’s a picture of Peter sitting at a table in what appears to be Tony’s lab. He’s got an open sketchbook in front of him and a pencil in his tattooed hand, spider ring, and others, clearly visible. His free hand is brushing a stray curl out of his face and he’s grinning wide at whoever’s behind the camera, presumably Tony. You can see the silver stud in the side of his nose and the small spider, with web, tattooed on his neck. He’s wearing a Queen t-shirt, meaning his tattooed arms are on full display.]_

**Goodbye Lucy @LucilleSanders**

‘Pretty’ was definitely the right word!!! Look at that face!!!

**Theres A Bee!!??!! @EthanyWithaB**

**@LucilleSanders** It really is!! I just- oh my god.

**Winter Never Left @AstridHaugen**

I just looked him up… Are you telling me this precious little cinnamon roll is a tattoo artist and body piercer??!!??

**Bi Bi Bi @ImNotInvisible**

**@AstridHaugen** Yes, he is! Guys, **@Spiderman** is the one that tattooed my arm! And my leg! _[AthenaTattoo.jpg](https://www.pinterest.com/pin/538320961709365083/) [FlowerTattoo.jpg](https://www.pinterest.com/pin/538320961682668203/)_

**Spiderman Replied To Me!!! @SpideyStan1**

He owns his own shop! Here’s the link to their Instagram. _Spider’sParlor_

**Road Work Ahead @NotAConstructionWorker**

Are you kidding me?!? He wears a spider ring all the time, he has a spider tattooed on his neck, he wears jewelry in his suit’s colors, and his shop is _literally_ called Spider’s Parlor Tattoos and Piercings?!? What an absolute legend!!!

**Hello Darkness @MyOldFriend**

**@NotAConstructionWorker** Absolutely! The nerve of this man! I mean, this puts him right up there with Tony ‘I am Iron Man’ Stark. They really are perfect together. #IronSpider

**Paws and More @QueensAnimalShelter**

**@Spiderman** You volunteer here?!?

**I Cant Pick One @AvengersStan**

Oh my god. Guys, **@Spiderman** pierced my nipple!! I don’t know what to do with this information.

**Im Doing My Best @AmIThough**

Guys go check out the Spider’s Parlor Instagram! The artwork is so good! Also, this explains why his employees called themselves ‘spiderlings’.

**Goodbye Lucy @LucilleSanders**

Why do I love the fact that **@Spiderman** is a tattoo artist and piercer so much?!?

**I Hate White Vans @DanielPerez**

Yo, **@Spiderman** gave me this!! _[WritingTattoo.jpg](https://www.pinterest.com/pin/538320961679858024/)_

**Ten Points To Slytherin @Page394**

What! I have an appointment with **@SecondSpiderling** next week!!

**Give Me A D @ImNotAEvenACheerleader**

I got my tongue pierced by **@Spiderman**!!!

**Look At All Those Chickens @ImADuck**

No wonder Tony called him pretty! Can we just imagine Tony Stark, all dressed up in one of his suits, next to Peter Parker, in jeans and a band shirt with all his tattoos and piercings?!? #OTP #IronSpider

**More Like Hurricane Tortilla @KatrinaGranger**

I don’t know what I was expecting, but this was not it. I couldn’t have imagined this in my wildest dreams. This is so cool!

**I Know How To Pronounce My State @ItShouldBeArKansas**

I suddenly have the need to get a tattoo… in New York…

**It Is What I Think @RebeccaLopez**

Wait. Wait. Wait. Remember how Thor just showed up one day with Mjolnir on his arm? And how a lot of the other Avengers said they have tattoos? And how Tony has one they’ve never seen but they all implied that Spidey (Peter Parker!) has?

**Spiderman Replied To Me!!! @SpideyStan1**

**@RebeccaLopez** Spidey tattooed the Avengers! It makes so much sense now! Do you think they’ll show us their tattoos now that they can tell us who did them?

**It Is What I Think @RebeccaLopez**

**@SpideyStan1** God, I hope they do! Especially Tony. What is it? Where is it?!?

**In Front Of My Salad!!! @IDon’tEvenLikeSalad**

I have never wished that I lived in New York City more than now…

**Leslie More Like Lesbian @GirlsLoveGirls**

Alright, I checked out that Instagram page and, I’m not gonna lie, **@FirstSpiderling** and **@BabySpiderling** can both get it. I mean, damn.

**I’m Not Wearing Khakis @JakeFromNotStateFarm**

Oh no. **@Spiderman** is the one that gave me my piercing last month.

**Clever Name @ActualName**

**@JakeFromNotStateFarm** What do you mean ‘oh no’? That’s so cool!!

**I’m Not Wearing Khakis @JakeFromNotStateFarm**

**@ActualName** You don’t understand. It’s a Prince Albert.

**Clever Name @ActualName**

**@JakeFromNotStateFarm** I had to look up what that was. RIP

**Friendly Neighborhood @Spiderman**

**@JakeFromNotStateFarm** Yeah, I remember that. How’s it healing?

**I’m Not Wearing Khakis @JakeFromNotStateFarm**

**@Spiderman** It’s, uh, it’s healing great, thanks.

**Friendly Neighborhood @Spiderman**

**@JakeFromNotStateFarm** Good to hear! Remember to keep it clean! Also, don’t worry, man. I’ve been doing this for over ten years. You’re not the first intimate piercing I’ve done.

**Spiderman Replied To Me!!! @SpideyStan1**

I am absolutely cackling! I love how _that_ was the one post he responded to!

 

 

 

[Starker Playlist](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=ithom_sKv50&list=PLiJuraD69EalFyCNwFBsnqtBpLrTg51iW)

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Finally, the reveal! I thought it would be appropriate for Tony to be the one to show his boy's pretty face to the world.  
> I enjoyed getting to write Twitter's reactions so much, especially @JakeFromNotStateFarm. Poor guy. And, of course, I had to make that the one post Spidey responded to.  
> Alright, now I'm gonna focus on trying to write the story that Starker gets together in! This means that I probably won't be posting quite as much as I have been, but it will hopefully be worth it!  
> The link above is to the playlist I made for that story/the Starker relationship I've crafted so you guys have an idea of what to expect. (Just ignore that some of them use feminine pronouns, etc. You get it.) You can listen to it on shuffle if you want, it doesn't really matter, but I do want to draw your attention to the types of songs I originally put at the end of the playlist. That's a little hint for how that particular story is going to end for them. ;) I'll probably give more detail on why I chose certain songs/when they seem to apply most when I post it.  
> Let me know what you thought and any ideas you have for what can happen next on Twitter or even in another story for the series!


	22. He's Humble or Something

**Pumped Up Kicks @BabySpiderling**

Alright, now that you guys know who **@Spiderman** is, we’ve decided to show off some of his stuff because he’s humble or something and doesn’t do it nearly enough.

**Pumped Up Kicks @BabySpiderling**

**@FirstSpiderling @SecondSpiderling** I say we each pick one from his art folder.

**The Responsible One @FirstSpiderling**

I’ve always loved this one.[ _TreeDrawing.jpg_](https://www.google.com/search?q=tree+drawing+detailed&tbm=isch&ved=2ahUKEwjj9uvf2dDnAhUDNVMKHQThA18Q2-cCegQIABAA&oq=tree+drawing+detailed&gs_l=img.3..0j0i5i30j0i8i30l8.209342.210531..210904...0.0..0.106.740.8j1......0....1..gws-wiz-img.......0i67.p_Lpa5A2ZJM&ei=kGRGXuPuEoPqzAKEwo_4BQ&bih=789&biw=1600&rlz=1C1CHBD_enUS720US720#imgrc=hqm_Gky0Y44XiM)

**Hablo Español @SecondSpiderling**

This one’s great. _[RoseDrawing.jpg](https://www.google.com/search?rlz=1C1CHBD_enUS720US720&biw=1600&bih=789&tbm=isch&sa=1&ei=k983Xfy7LuqP5wLqtKaIAw&q=rose+drawing+with+water+drops&oq=rose+drawing+with+water+drops&gs_l=img.3...40727.42636..42812...0.0..0.92.1104.17......0....1..gws-wiz-img.......0j0i67j0i8i30j0i24.EfihGDoFhOU&ved=0ahUKEwi80ZH63MzjAhXqx1kKHWqaCTEQ4dUDCAY&uact=5#imgrc=65nmzs9RHAXfAM:)_

**Pumped Up Kicks @BabySpiderling**

And I like this one! _[HeartDrawing.jpg](https://www.google.com/search?rlz=1C1CHBD_enUS720US720&biw=1600&bih=789&tbm=isch&sa=1&ei=a-o4XdP9DcrM_Ab9_b2QDA&q=heart+drawing+tattoo&oq=heart+drawing+tattoo&gs_l=img.3..0j0i5i30l5j0i8i30l4.15157.16048..16209...0.0..0.130.596.5j2......0....1..gws-wiz-img.......35i39.NNKXiYhvHMk&ved=0ahUKEwiT38q3287jAhVKJt8KHf1-D8IQ4dUDCAY&uact=5#imgrc=vbMlx0TqD1XSyM:)_

**Friendly Neighborhood @Spiderman**

What are you three doing?

**The Responsible One @FirstSpiderling**

We’re bragging on your behalf, Boss.

**Friendly Neighborhood @Spiderman**

Well, stop it. Two of you have appointments within the hour. Get back to work.

**Hablo Español @SecondSpiderling**

Sí, Boss.

**Pumped Up Kicks @BabySpiderling**

Sure thing, Chief!

**The Responsible One @FirstSpiderling**

Alright, Boss.

 

 

**Witchy Woman @ScarletWitch**

I know he’s a good artist, but sometimes I just see something he’s done and, _wow_ , you know?

**You Know Who I Am @IronMan**

**@ScarletWitch** Believe me, I know.

**Iced Americano @CaptainAmerica**

You know, we’ve got that blank wall in the living room…

**Better Bird Avenger @Falcon**

You think we can get him to paint it?

**First Bird Avenger @Hawkeye**

I mean, if we get **@IronMan** to ask, we’re almost guaranteed he’ll say yes.

**You Know Who I Am @IronMan**

…I’ll mention it tonight.

**Tired Old Man @BuckyBarnes**

Alright, so, Peter’s painting the living room wall.

**Original Spider @BlackWidow**

**@BuckyBarnes** Pretty much, yeah.

 

 

**Spiderman Replied To Me!!! @SpideyStan1**

Aaww, it’s so cute how the spiderlings are bragging for him!

**Goodbye Lucy @LucilleSanders**

Okay, but, looking at that Instagram, he really is an amazing artist.

**I Hate White Vans @DanielPerez**

Look at that tree!! How long did those branches take?!?

**Look At All Those Chickens @ImADuck**

I love how they all know they can get Spidey to do things by making Tony ask. #IronSpider

**It Is What I Think @RebeccaLopez**

God, I hope he paints that wall!! I wanna see it!!

**I Cant Pick One @AvengersStan**

I really want a tattoo now…

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Just the spiderlings bragging because Peter won't.  
> I found all of the drawings using Google, so, credit to those artists.  
> Let me know what you thought and any ideas you might have!


	23. For the Future

**Friendly Neighborhood @Spiderman**

And to think, he originally didn’t even want a cat in the tower. **@IronMan**

_[It’s a picture of Tony working in his lab. He’s leaning back against a table with a hologram schematic open in front of him. Jenny is sitting on the table, leaning against him and clearly demanding attention. He’s manipulating the hologram with one hand only because the other is occupied with petting her.]_

**You Know Who I Am @IronMan**

I didn’t ask to be called out like this.

**Original Spider @BlackWidow**

**@IronMan** You didn’t have to ask. We all know you love that cat.

**Witchy Woman @ScarletWitch**

To be fair, we all love Jenny.

**Tired Old Man @BuckyBarnes**

Well, obviously. She’s great.

**First Bird Avenger @Hawkeye**

I’m still a dog person, but she’s not bad. She’s not a dog, but she’s not bad.

**Better Bird Avenger @Falcon**

**@IronMan** See, aren’t you glad you’re so whipped and got him a cat?

**You Know Who I Am @IronMan**

Shut up, Sam.

**Friendly Neighborhood @Spiderman**

You know, Clint’s right. Dogs are great too…

**You Know Who I Am @IronMan**

**@Spiderman** No, Peter.

**Friendly Neighborhood @Spiderman**

**@IronMan** I’m not saying right now. It’s just something to think about for the future.

**First Bird Avenger @Hawkeye**

Alright! We’re getting a dog at some point!

**Iced Americano @CaptainAmerica**

**@Hawkeye** He didn’t say yes, Clint.

**Tired Old Man @BuckyBarnes**

Steve. Come on.

**Better Bird Avenger @Falcon**

We all know he’s gonna say yes.

**Iced Americano @CaptainAmerica**

…Alright, yeah. We’re getting a dog at some point.

**You Know Who I Am @IronMan**

**@Hawkeye @Falcon @BuckyBarnes @CaptainAmerica** Shut up.

 

**Ten Points To Slytherin @Page394**

No one is immune to an animal’s charm. Not even the Avengers.

**It Is What I Think @RebeccaLopez**

So, how long do we think it’s gonna be before they get a dog?

**Road Work Ahead @NotAConstructionWorker**

**@RebeccaLopez** Definitely within the year.

**Look At All Those Chickens @ImADuck**

Tony is so whipped for him!! Also, was I the only one that squealed when Peter literally started making plans with Tony ‘for the future’?!? #OTP #IronSpider

**Bi Bi Bi @ImNotInvisible**

I love how Peter just seems to be casually planning to fill Avengers Tower with animals and everybody is apparently on board with it. (Even Tony, he just won’t admit it.) #AvengersFamily

**Paws and More @QueensAnimalShelter**

**@IronMan @Spiderman** We have plenty of dogs ready to adopt! When should we be expecting you?

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> It will probably be a while before they get a dog, but it will happen eventually.  
> Guys, I'm like halfway through the story where they finally get together! I'm pretty sure it might end up being one of the longest stories in this series...  
> Let me know what you thought and any ideas you have!


	24. A Suit

**Witchy Woman @ScarletWitch**

I’m happy to announce that **@Spiderman** now owns an actual suit.

**Friendly Neighborhood @Spiderman**

I’m not so happy about it.

**You Know Who I Am @IronMan**

**@Spiderman** You only have to wear it for one night, sweetheart.

**Original Spider @BlackWidow**

**@Spiderman** You clean up well, младший брат.

**Tired Old Man @BuckyBarnes**

This is gonna be great!

**Better Bird Avenger @Falcon**

I know! He already hates it so much!

**Iced Americano @CaptainAmerica**

**@BuckyBarnes @Falcon** Stop it, you two.

**First Bird Avenger @Hawkeye**

**@Spiderman** Don’t worry, Peter. I’m sure everything will be fine.

**Witchy Woman @ScarletWitch**

**@Hawkeye** What are you up to?

**First Bird Avenger @Hawkeye**

Nothing! I’m just saying that I’m sure **@IronMan** will love it. #IronSpider

**Friendly Neighborhood @Spiderman**

Shut up, Clint.

**You Know Who I Am @IronMan**

Shut up, Clint.

**Original Spider @BlackWidow**

I have a really good feeling about this event…

 

 

**Look At All Those Chickens @ImADuck**

A couple that tells friends to shut up together, stays together. #IronSpider

**Spiderman Replied To Me!!! @SpideyStan1**

Woah! I can not wait to see Spidey in a suit!! What event are they going to?!?

**I Cant Pick One @AvengersStan**

**@SpideyStan1** They’ve got that fundraiser coming up!

**It Is What I Think @RebeccaLopez**

God, I love it every time Natasha calls him ‘little brother’!

**Give Me A D @ImNotAEvenACheerleader**

Do you think it’s gonna be like a full tux or what?!?

**Pumped Up Kicks @BabySpider**

**@ImNotEvenACheerleader** Not a chance. It’ll be enough of a struggle to get him out of jeans.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This is a short one but that's just because I'm almost done with the other story! It should be out within a few hours at most.  
> Let me know what you thought and any ideas you have!


	25. #IronSpider

**Original Spider @BlackWidow**

Guess who just won a bet? #IronSpider

**First Bird Avenger @Hawkeye**

Honestly, I really should know better than to bet against you by now.

**Tired Old Man @BuckyBarnes**

We all should.

**Better Bird Avenger @Falcon**

I ain’t even mad. At least somebody won. Our suffering is over. #IronSpider

**Witchy Woman @ScarletWitch**

rt

**Iced Americano @CaptainAmerica**

rt

**Thunderstruck @Thor**

rt

**The Other Guy @BruceBanner**

rt

**Friggason @Loki**

rt

**First Bird Avenger @Hawkeye**

rt

**Tired Old Man @BuckyBarnes**

rt

**Original Spider @BlackWidow**

**@IronMan @Spiderman** Boys? You two wanna chime in?

**You Know Who I Am @IronMan**

#IronSpider

**Friendly Neighborhood @Spiderman**

#IronSpider

 

 

**Look At All Those Chickens @ImADuck**

I am crying!!! It finally happened!!! I will go down with this ship!!! #OTP #IronSpider

**Spiderman Replied To Me!!! @SpideyStan1**

They confirmed the #IronSpider!!! I can’t say I’m surprised it finally happened, I mean, did you see those pictures of Spidey last night?!?

**Road Work Ahead @NotAConstructionWorker**

I love that not only are they actually together now, but the other Avengers apparently had a bet going. #IronSpider #AvengersFamily

**It Is What I Think @RebeccaLopez**

Yes! Yes! Yes! #IronSpider

**I Hate White Vans @DanielPerez**

Is anyone even surprised that Natasha won the #IronSpider bet they had going?

**Leslie More Like Lesbian @GirlsLoveGirls**

**@DanielPerez** Absolutely not.

**Pumped Up Kicks @BabySpiderling**

Finally! #OTP #IronSpider

**The Responsible One @FirstSpiderling**

**@SecondSpiderling @BabySpiderling** About the bet we had… #IronSpider

**Hablo Español @SecondSpiderling**

**@FirstSpiderling @BabySpiderling** I’ll take cash, please. #IronSpider

**More Like Hurricane Tortilla @KatrinaGranger**

LMAO. Were all of their friends betting on them?

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Yes, everyone was betting on them.  
> Credit goes to Gracelynn for inspiring this chapter.  
> Let me know what you thought and any ideas you have!


	26. He Cooks?!?

**Tired Old Man @BuckyBarnes**

He can cook?!? **@Spiderman**

_[It’s a picture of Peter standing in front of the stove and stirring something in a large pan. Tony is standing behind him with one hand on his hip, the other reaching for something on the counter. Peter is looking at Tony over his shoulder, glaring lightly at him for stealing ingredients but obviously trying not to smile. Jenny can be seen twisting around their legs.]_

**Friendly Neighborhood @Spiderman**

I guess? Yeah?

**You Know Who I Am @IronMan**

There’s no guess about it, sweetheart.

**Better Bird Avenger @Falcon**

**@Spiderman** I’m confused too. I’ve seen you eat. I thought you just lived off junk food.

**First Bird Avenger @Hawkeye**

**@Spiderman** Yeah, I mean, you literally had a box full of Ramen and takeout menus when you moved in.

**Friendly Neighborhood @Spiderman**

Just because I _can_ cook doesn’t mean I do it often.

**Original Spider @BlackWidow**

**@Spiderman @IronMan** Is it a genius thing? You both do it.

**You Know Who I Am @IronMan**

Maybe. It’s quicker and easier to just order something when you’re busy.

**Friendly Neighborhood @Spiderman**

True. I mean, I’ve still got one hand to work with if I have chopsticks in the other.

**Iced Americano @CaptainAmerica**

That cannot be healthy.

**Witchy Woman @ScarletWitch**

**@Spiderman** I can’t believe you can cook, and you never told me.

**Witchy Woman @ScarletWitch**

**@IronMan** And you knew!

**You Know Who I Am @Ironman**

Of course I knew.

**Tired Old Man @BuckyBarnes**

I just, I feel lied to.

**Better Bird Avenger @Falcon**

So do I.

**Friendly Neighborhood @Spiderman**

I didn’t lie!

**First Bird Avenger @Hawkeye**

**@Spiderman** How could you not tell us you can cook like this?!?

**Friendly Neighborhood @Spiderman**

I didn’t know I needed to! Why is this so surprising? Cooking and baking are basically just chemistry.

**Iced Americano @CaptainAmerica**

You can bake too?

**Friendly Neighborhood @Spiderman**

…no.

**Original Spider @BlackWidow**

They’re never gonna let him leave the kitchen again.

 

 

**Theres A Bee!!??!! @EthanyWithaB**

Peter is really 31 years old and apparently eats like a college student. We stan.

**Look At All Those Chickens @ImADuck**

Awww, I love how Tony seemed low-key offended they would think there was something about Peter he didn’t know. #IronSpider

**I Know How To Pronounce My State @ItShouldBeArKansas**

“a box full of Ramen and takeout menus” Why is this literally me moving out of my dorm?

**Hello Darkness @MyOldFriend**

“Is it a genius thing?” Yo, how smart is Spidey? I mean, is he literally a genius too?

**Spiderman Replied To Me!!! @SpideyStan1**

**@MyOldFriend** I don’t know IQ or anything, but his Wiki page says he graduated top of his class from Midtown School of Science and Technology, which is, WOW.

**Bi Bi Bi @ImNotInvisible**

Ah, yes. The struggle of trying to cook while someone steals ingredients. I know it well.

**Goodbye Lucy @LucilleSanders**

Okay, I don’t think I was truly prepared for how much cuter #IronSpider would be once it actually happened. Look at them! They look so domestic! #OTP

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Poor Peter. He should have just kept his cooking/baking abilities between him and Tony.  
> Yes, my Peter graduated top of his class. I'm trying to figure out how to do a story kind of focusing on Peter's time at Midtown and the irony of the top graduate from a STEM school becoming a tattoo artist/body piercer. I'm thinking maybe a field trip fic (I know. I know. Cliche.) where a Midtown class comes to tour the tower and they get a Q/A session with the Avengers where they just kind of focus on Peter because, oh my god, Spiderman went to our school.  
> What do you guys think about the possible field trip story? Yes or no?  
> Let me know what you thought and any ideas you might have!


	27. What songs...

**I’ve Got A @WeirdQuestion**

**@Spiderman** Weird question but here we go: What songs would all of the Avengers be?

**Friendly Neighborhood @Spiderman**

**@WeirdQuestion** I can give you my ringtones for each of them.

**Friendly Neighborhood @Spiderman**

**@IronMan** Tony is, of course, _Iron Man_ by Black Sabbath.

**Friendly Neighborhood @Spiderman**

**@BlackWidow** Natasha is _Killer Queen_ by Queen.

**Friendly Neighborhood @Spiderman**

**@CaptainAmerica** Steve is _Fortunate Son_ by Creedence Clearwater Revival.

**Friendly Neighborhood @Spiderman**

**@BuckyBarnes** Bucky is _Carry On Wayward Son_ by Kansas.

**Friendly Neighborhood @Spiderman**

**@Falcon** Sam is _Lean On Me_ by Bill Withers.

**Friendly Neighborhood @Spiderman**

**@Hawkeye** Clint is _Take It Easy_ by The Eagles.

**Friendly Neighborhood @Spiderman**

**@BruceBanner** Bruce is _Life Is a Lemon_ by Meatloaf.

**Friendly Neighborhood @Spiderman**

**@Thor** Thor is _Immigrant Song_ by Led Zeppelin.

**Friendly Neighborhood @Spiderman**

**@Loki** Loki is _Sympathy for the Devil_ by The Rolling Stones.

**Friendly Neighborhood @Spiderman**

**@ScarletWitch** Wanda is _Rhiannon_ by Fleetwood Mac.

**I’ve Got A @WeirdQuestion**

This is amazing, but what about **@Spiderman**? Does everybody have ringtones for him?

**Friendly Neighborhood @Spiderman**

… I honestly don’t know.

**You Know Who I Am @IronMan**

**@WeirdQuestion @Spiderman** We do. It’s split between _Everyday Superhero_ by Smash Mouth and one person with _Radioactive_ by Imagine Dragons.

**Friendly Neighborhood @Spiderman**

**@IronMan** You’re the one who chose _Radioactive,_ aren’t you?

**You Know Who I Am @IronMan**

Sweetheart, I couldn’t let that opportunity pass. Besides, you literally set mine as _Iron Man_.

**Friendly Neighborhood @Spiderman**

Yeah, alright. Fair enough, honey.

 

 

**Spiderman Replied To Me!!! @SpideyStan1**

Okay, so, I love all of this, but can we just talk about how the Avengers collectively chose _Everyday Superhero_ for Spidey? That is absolutely perfect!

**Give Me A D @ImNotAEvenACheerleader**

So, Peter and Tony have the same taste in music. I can’t believe they’re one of _those_ couples who probably never have to argue about the aux cord. #IronSpider

**Leslie More Like Lesbian @GirlsLoveGirls**

I love how Wanda’s is a song by Stevie Nicks AKA the original Witchy Queen™ herself.

**Look At All Those Chickens @ImADuck**

I love that Peter immediately knew Tony was the one with _Radioactive_. #IronSpider

**Bi Bi Bi @ImNotInvisible**

Get you a friend that takes the time to individually set ringtones. #AvengersFamily

**Road Work Ahead @NotAConstructionWorker**

Okay, these are all great, but where’s my **@Falcon** appreciation?!? I mean, it says a lot for his personal ringtone to be set as _Lean On Me_.

**I Cant Pick One @AvengersStan**

Honestly, if it was me, I’d just use that spider bite as an excuse for anything. “Sorry, can’t, a radioactive spider bit me.”

**Im Doing My Best @AmIThough**

**@AvengersStan** I mean, I gotta wonder about that though. Like, how did that happen? Where does one even find a radioactive spider?

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Credit goes to UselessTypo for the weird question.  
> Believe it or not, I already had most of these songs typed up in a document that's just notes for this universe. Like, it literally said 'Peter has a ringtone for every Avenger' followed by a bulleted list.  
> P.S. I almost wish that Captain America: Civil War was canon for this universe. I only say that because then I definitely would have made Steve's song 'I Fought the Law' by The Clash.  
> Let me know what you thought and any ideas you have!


	28. Inspiration Hits

**Tired Old Man @BuckyBarnes**

**@Spiderman** What have you been doing?!?

**Friendly Neighborhood @Spiderman**

What do you mean?

**Iced Americano @CaptainAmerica**

Peter, you and your clothes are covered in paint.

**Original Spider @BlackWidow**

You also look like you haven’t slept.

**Friendly Neighborhood @Spiderman**

**@CaptainAmerica** I was painting. **@BlackWidow** That’s because I haven’t.

**Witchy Woman @ScarletWitch**

What do you mean you haven’t slept?

**You Know Who I Am @IronMan**

**@ScarletWitch** He already said he was painting.

**Better Bird Avenger @Falcon**

How does that translate into not sleeping?

**Friendly Neighborhood @Spiderman**

Look, when inspiration hits, it hits. I was working all night. I didn’t have time for sleep.

**First Bird Avenger @Hawkeye**

Does this… happen often?

**Friendly Neighborhood @Spiderman**

It happens when it happens. Just like **@IronMan** when he spends whole nights in his lab.

**Tired Old Man @BuckyBarnes**

**@Spiderman @IronMan** Why does it sound like you two have some kind of system worked out for this?

**You Know Who I Am @IronMan**

We do. It’s been perfected over the years.

**First Bird Avenger @Hawkeye**

What do you do if it happens at the same time for both of you?

**Friendly Neighborhood @Spiderman**

…that actually hasn’t happened.

**Iced Americano @CaptainAmerica**

You two have known each other for 14 years and that’s never happened?

**Friendly Neighborhood @Spiderman**

Not to my knowledge. **@IronMan** Honey?

**You Know Who I Am @IronMan**

Not to mine either.

**Original Spider @BlackWidow**

To be fair, it probably will now that we’ve asked.

**Witchy Woman @ScarletWitch**

**@Spiderman @IronMan** What do we do if it _does_ happen?

**You Know Who I Am @IronMan**

Mainly just try to make sure we don’t dehydrate or anything.

**Friendly Neighborhood @Spiderman**

Please make sure to leave any drinks for me in a mug that looks very different from the one I’ve got my paint water in.

**Better Bird Avenger @Falcon**

**@Spiderman** So, how many times…?

**Friendly Neighborhood @Spiderman**

Too many times.

 

 

**Spiderman Replied To Me!!! @SpideyStan1**

LMAO. “Too many times.” Poor Spidey.

**Look At All Those Chickens @ImADuck**

14 years?!? They’ve known each other for 14 years?!? Also, I love that they have a system worked out to take care of each other!!! #OTP #IronSpider

**More Like Hurricane Tortilla @KatrinaGranger**

I love how Tony just automatically knows what Peter means when he says he was painting. #IronSpider

**Bi Bi Bi @ImNotInvisible**

I really felt that with the ‘paint water’. It’s never fun when that happens.

**Clever Name @ActualName**

Aaww, I wanna see Peter all covered in paint!

**In Front Of My Salad!!! @IDon’tEvenLikeSalad**

So, does this mean Peter was just casually walking around Avengers Tower covered in paint…?

**Winter Never Left @AstridHaugen**

If inspiration is gonna hit them at the same time, then it’s a good thing they all live in the same building. #AvengersFamily

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Yes, 14 years. I've done the math for this universe and they met in 2005, not long after Peter graduated and three years before Afghanistan. You'll learn a little more about how in the field trip story I'm working on. By the way, Peter is about to turn 32 (I might do a chapter about that) and Tony is 40. Yes, I changed Tony's age some too, but it just means he was younger then in canon when he became Iron Man, etc.  
> Speaking of the field trip story, I've pretty much decided that my Peter in this universe went to school with Harry, Gwen, etc. instead of with Ned, Michelle, etc. That being said, should Ned, Michelle, Flash, etc. be on the field trip (it's the decathlon team that's on the trip) or should I just use random students? I kind of really wanna use them but I also want your opinions so let me know what you think.  
> P.S. Some hints about the upcoming field trip story: Peter's old teacher, starstruck students, mentions of Harry AKA Peter's ex  
> Let me know what you thought and any ideas you have!


	29. Jinxed

**Better Bird Avenger @Falcon**

We jinxed them. They didn’t even make it back to their room before they crashed.

_[It’s a picture of Tony and Peter sleeping on a couch, obviously exhausted. Tony’s wearing a black tank top and worn out jeans with grease and oil smeared on his arms and face, his hair a complete mess. Peter’s wearing holey jeans and a t-shirt that was once plain white but is now covered in different colors of paint. His face and hands are similarly colored, the paint blending with his tattoos. He’s laying on Tony’s chest with one hand resting directly over his heart. Tony has both arms wrapped around him with one of his hands lightly tangled in messy curls.]_

**Original Spider @BlackWidow**

I knew we shouldn’t have asked.

**Tired Old Man @BuckyBarnes**

How long were they even awake?

**Iced Americano @CaptainAmerica**

I don’t know. Most of us were on that mission. **@ScarletWitch** How long were they awake?

**Witchy Woman @ScarletWitch**

Around 36 hours or so.

**Better Bird Avenger @Falcon**

Seriously? What were they even working on?

**First Bird Avenger @Hawkeye**

We don’t really know. When we asked, Tony techno-babbled something and Peter just kinda waved us off.

**Iced Americano @CaptainAmerica**

Should we wake them up so they can go to bed or move them or…?

**Original Spider @BlackWidow**

Leave them there. They need to sleep.

**Tired Old Man @BuckyBarnes**

I can’t believe they managed 14 years without this happening.

**Witchy Woman @ScarletWitch**

Well, it wouldn’t have happened at all if _someone_ hadn’t jinxed them. **@Hawkeye**

**First Bird Avenger @Hawkeye**

How was I supposed to know this would happen?!?

 

 

**Look At All Those Chickens @ImADuck**

Look at them!!! They look so cute together!!! #OTP #IronSpider

**Spiderman Replied To Me!!! @SpideyStan1**

Okay, but apparently their inspiration completely synced? Like, they crashed at the same time, right? #IronSpider

**Im Doing My Best @AmIThough**

I love how they all just accept ‘techno-babble’ as a legitimate term to describe Tony Stark talking.

**Hello Darkness @MyOldFriend**

“move them” Cap was fully prepared to carry two grown men to bed. Amazing. Absolutely amazing. #AvengersFamily

**Road Work Ahead @NotAConstructionWorker**

**@MyOldFriend** Get you the kinda friend… #AvengersFamily

**Theres A Bee!!??!! @EthanyWithaB**

I’ll say they need sleep. The shadows under their eyes are darker than my eyeliner!

**Ten Points To Slytherin @Page394**

I wonder if Spidey accidently drank paint water again?

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> This is a short one but I just couldn't get the idea of them completely crashing together just because Clint jinxed them out of my head.  
> P.S. I posted 'Midtown' AKA the field trip story. I forgot to mark it as 'part of a series' at first and had to go back to edit so I could add it. That means I'm not sure if anybody subscribed to the series itself will get a notification about it, so, there you go.  
> Let me know what you thought and any ideas you have or would like to see/read!


	30. They're Too Much

**First Bird Avenger @Hawkeye**

Honestly, they’re just too much sometimes. #IronSpider

_[It’s a picture of Tony and Peter dancing together in the middle of the lab. Tony has his hands on Peter’s hips while Peter has his arms around Tony’s neck, lightly crossed at the wrists. They’re completely focused on each other, eyes locked and wearing soft smiles.]_

**Witchy Woman @ScarletWitch**

They really are adorable, aren’t they?

**Better Bird Avenger @Falcon**

They are. It’s almost sickening sometimes, really.

**Iced Americano @CaptainAmerica**

**@Falcon** Leave them alone, Sam. Just be happy they’re finally together.

**Tired Old Man @BuckyBarnes**

**@Falcon** He’s right. Remember what it was like when they were just endlessly pining.

**Better Bird Avenger @Falcon**

I know. I know. I’m just saying that Clint’s right. Sometimes they’re a little much.

**First Bird Avenger @Hawkeye**

They didn’t even notice me come into the lab. They were still exactly like that when I left.

**Original Spider @BlackWidow**

**@Hawkeye** What were they even dancing to this time?

**First Bird Avenger @Hawkeye**

It was _Future Days_ by Pearl Jam.

**Witchy Woman @ScarletWitch**

Aaaww! First dance song, I’m calling it!

**Iced Americano @CaptainAmerica**

**@BlackWidow** Wait, this time?

**Tired Old Man @BuckyBarnes**

**@BlackWidow** Have they done this before?

**Original Spider @BlackWidow**

Definitely. I mean, I only walked in on it once before, but it’s probably happened more.

**Witchy Woman @ScarletWitch**

**@BlackWidow** Was it an equally romantic song?

**Original Spider @BlackWidow**

From a certain perspective, I guess. It was _You Shook Me All Night Long_ by AC/DC.

**First Bird Avenger @Hawkeye**

…they were slow dancing to AC/DC?

**Original Spider @BlackWidow**

Yes.

**Iced Americano @CaptainAmerica**

**@Hawkeye** Given who we’re talking about, are you even really surprised?

**First Bird Avenger @Hawkeye**

You know what, no. I’m actually not surprised at all.

**Better Bird Avenger @Falcon**

Alright, as sickening as it can be sometimes, they really are perfect for each other. #IronSpider

 

 

**Look At All Those Chickens @ImADuck**

I’m actually crying!!! This really is THE ship guys!!! #OTP #IronSpider

**Spiderman Replied To Me!!! @SpideyStan1**

They really are actual couple goals. #IronSpider

**It Is What I Think @RebeccaLopez**

“first dance song” Wanda is really out here planning an #IronSpider wedding.

**Bi Bi Bi @ImNotInvisible**

**@RebeccaLopez** We can only hope it will happen one day. I mean, talk about the real royal wedding. #IronSpider

**Goodbye Lucy @LucilleSanders**

Looking at this, at the way they’re looking at each other, I only have one question: How did it take them 14 years to get together?!?

**I Hate White Vans @DanielPerez**

Slow dancing to AC/DC. Absolute legends. #IronSpider

**Leslie More Like Lesbian @GirlsLoveGirls**

I had to look up _Future Days_ and am now honest to god crying. My heart can’t take these two! #IronSpider

**Winter Never Left @AstridHaugen**

Aaawww! I want someone to look at the way #IronSpider looks at each other…

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> God, I love these two so much.  
> Don't go getting too excited about a Starker wedding. That's definitely a while away. Wanda's just getting a little eager...  
> Let me know what you thought and any ideas you have!


	31. Bones

**Tired Old Man @BuckyBarnes**

I just don’t understand. **@Spiderman** How are you so light?

_[It’s a picture of Natasha and Peter standing in what looks like a park. Natasha’s wearing jeans and a tucked in black tank top with sunglasses on her head to hold back her hair. Peter’s got on a pair of holey jeans and a Pink Floyd t-shirt with his flowery boots. They’re both grinning at the camera, Peter on Natasha’s back, who appears to be holding him with absolutely no effort on her part.]_

**Friendly Neighborhood @Spiderman**

Are you implying Natasha is weak?

**Original Spider @BlackWidow**

Yeah, are you?

**First Bird Avenger @Hawkeye**

**@BuckyBarnes** Tread carefully, man.

**Tired Old Man @BuckyBarnes**

**@BlackWidow** Of course not! I’m just saying that it should have taken at least some effort for you to carry him around.

**Original Spider @BlackWidow**

Honestly though, it really did take no effort. **@Spiderman** Why _are_ you so light?

**Friendly Neighborhood @Spiderman**

Radioactive spider bite.

**Better Bird Avenger @Falcon**

That is not an answer to everything.

**You Know Who I Am @IronMan**

You’d be surprised by how much it actually does explain.

**Witchy Woman @ScarletWitch**

**@Spiderman** What does the spider bite have to do with it?

**Friendly Neighborhood @Spiderman**

My bones are less dense.

**Iced Americano @CaptainAmerica**

…we’re gonna need a little more than that, Peter.

**You Know Who I Am @IronMan**

Spiders don’t have bones.

**Iced Americano @CaptainAmerica**

…still gonna need a little more.

**First Bird Avenger @Hawkeye**

**@IronMan** That’s one of the most terrifying things you could have answered with.

**Better Bird Avenger @Falcon**

**@Spiderman** Okay, thankfully, I know you have bones. I’ve seen them broken.

**Friendly Neighborhood @Spiderman**

Yes, I still have bones. They’re just less dense than a normal human.

**You Know Who I Am @IronMan**

It helps him to swing around, crawl on walls/ceilings, and makes him more flexible.

**Witchy Woman @ScarletWitch**

**@Spiderman** _That’s_ why you’re so flexible?

**Friendly Neighborhood @Spiderman**

I mean, the ballet and stuff help, but yeah.

**Iced Americano @CaptainAmerica**

This does explain how Tony can just pick you up and walk off when you get too into a project and refuse to sleep.

**Friendly Neighborhood @Spiderman**

**@CaptainAmerica** Yeah, but to be fair, I can do the same. I _have_ done the same.

**Tired Old Man @BuckyBarnes**

**@Spiderman @IronMan** Is that part of the ‘system’ you two have worked out?

**Friendly Neighborhood @Spiderman**

Yes.

**You Know Who I Am @IronMan**

Yes.

 

 

**Look At All Those Chickens @ImADuck**

God, I love those two!!! Just look at how they explained the bone thing together!!! #IronSpider

**Spiderman Replied To Me!!! @SpideyStan1**

Man, I didn’t even think about the bone thing when I was researching spiders. Lowered density makes so much sense!

**Im Doing My Best @AmIThough**

Yet again, I wonder: where does one even find a radioactive spider? How did that happen?

**Bi Bi Bi @ImNotInvisible**

I adore the mental image of Tony just walking over to Peter, picking him up, and walking off without a word! #IronSpider

**Give Me A D @ImNotAEvenACheerleader**

“That is not an answer to everything.” I love how this implies that Peter _does_ try to use it as an answer for everything.

**Leslie More Like Lesbian @GirlsLoveGirls**

I love Bucky’s immediate backtracking when they tried to imply he said Natasha was weak.

**I Know How To Pronounce My State @ItShouldBeArKansas**

Alright, as someone who used to do gymnastics I wanna know exactly how flexible he is.

**Hello Darkness @MyOldFriend**

**@ItShouldBeArKansas** The bone density thing probably means that it’s, like, contortionist levels.

**I Cant Pick One @AvengersStan**

Aaaww, look at them! #AvengersFamily

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Credit goes to UselessTypo for inspiring me to write Peter getting a piggy back ride, or as I like to call it, a Yoda ride. :)  
> Let me know what you thought and any ideas you might have!


	32. Emphasis on Spider

**Iced Americano @CaptainAmerica**

Why did I just walk into the living room to see Peter braiding Wanda’s hair? **@Spiderman @ScarletWitch**

**Witchy Woman @ScarletWitch**

He braids better than anyone I’ve ever met.

**Original Spider @BlackWidow**

It’s true. **@Spiderman** Where did you even learn to braid like that?

**Friendly Neighborhood @Spiderman**

Radioactive spider bite.

**Better Bird Avenger @Falcon**

That’s still not an answer for everything, Peter.

**Friendly Neighborhood @Spiderman**

No, really. I can weave pretty much anything.

**Tired Old Man @BuckyBarnes**

**@Spiderman** Wait, can you knit?

**Friendly Neighborhood @Spiderman**

Yeah, why?

**Tired Old Man @BuckyBarnes**

Is that where the new blanket on the couch came from?

**You Know Who I Am @IronMan**

Yeah. He gets fidgety sometimes and needs something to do with his hands. We’ve got one at the foot of our bed too.

**First Bird Avenger @Hawkeye**

**@Spiderman** So, what other spidery traits do you have?

**Friendly Neighborhood @Spiderman**

Honestly, it might just be easier if you ask specific questions.

**First Bird Avenger @Hawkeye**

Are you venomous?

**Friendly Neighborhood @Spiderman**

No, I am not venomous. I don’t actually have fangs, though my canines are a just little longer and sharper than normal.

**Better Bird Avenger @Falcon**

You mix your web fluid, right? None of that actually comes out of you?

**Friendly Neighborhood @Spiderman**

Don’t worry, Sam. I mix it all in the lab.

**Iced Americano @CaptainAmerica**

Can you thermoregulate? I mean, Tony was _really_ worried when you were still living in your old apartment and had no heat.

**Friendly Neighborhood @Spiderman**

…to an extent. If I get too cold for too long, then I basically go into a state of hibernation.

**Original Spider @BlackWidow**

Have you ever actually gone into full hibernation?

**Friendly Neighborhood @Spiderman**

Almost.

**You Know Who I Am @IronMan**

**@Spiderman** Never again.

**Friendly Neighborhood @Spiderman**

**@IronMan** It’s okay, honey. You managed to wake me up.

**Tired Old Man @BuckyBarnes**

Can you regrow limbs?

**Friendly Neighborhood @Spiderman**

I’ve never actually had to test that one, but I’m pretty sure it’s a no. Spiders regenerate lost legs when they molt which is something I definitely do not do.

**Witchy Woman @ScarletWitch**

The bite completely altered your DNA, right?

**Friendly Neighborhood @Spiderman**

Right.

**Witchy Woman @ScarletWitch**

So, if you had kids would they have spidery powers too?

**Friendly Neighborhood @Spiderman**

Theoretically, yes. I’ll never actually know because I am 1. completely in love with Tony and 2. sterile.

**Original Spider @BlackWidow**

Oh.

**Friendly Neighborhood @Spiderman**

Yeah. Like I said, I did every test I could possibly think of after the bite. To be fair though, that might not actually be because of it.

**First Bird Avenger @Hawkeye**

Speaking of the bite, exactly how radioactive are you? Like, if you’re seriously injured on a mission, is it safe for us to be around your blood?

**Friendly Neighborhood @Spiderman**

I’m not ever gonna be able to donate blood or anything but it is mostly safe. As long as it doesn’t actually enter anyone else’s bloodstream then it’s safe to touch.

**You Know Who I Am @IronMan**

**@Spiderman** Not that it matters because you are not allowed to get seriously injured.

**Friendly Neighborhood @Spiderman**

**@IronMan** Tony, you know I can’t guarantee that.

**You Know Who I Am @IronMan**

**@Spiderman** I’m guaranteeing it, sweetheart.

**Original Spider @BlackWidow**

Aaannnd, Peter just left for Tony’s lab. We won’t be seeing them for a while.

 

 

**Spiderman Replied To Me!!! @SpideyStan1**

We’ve learned so much today! Also, I would kill for Spidey to braid my hair.

**Look At All Those Chickens @ImADuck**

They went from being so far in denial to Peter casually saying he’s “completely in love with Tony”!!! #OTP #IronSpider

**Bi Bi Bi @ImNotInvisible**

A hand knitted blanket at the foot of their bed is so domestic!! I love it!! #IronSpider

**More Like Hurricane Tortilla @KatrinaGranger**

Honestly, could you imagine a toddler with spider powers though? Like, the kid’s learning to crawl, hits a wall, and just keeps going up.

**Clever Name @ActualName**

Wow. I never really thought about how much that bite would have actually affected him beyond the obvious.

**Road Work Ahead @NotAConstructionWorker**

I am living for Tony absolutely refusing to let Peter get injured. #IronSpider

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Credit goes to OctobersLily510 for inspiring me to write about Peter's more spidery traits.  
> I love the mental image of Peter braiding the girls' hair with quick and precise little spider fingers. (Also, not mentioned, but Thor has 100% shown Peter some Viking braids before.)  
> Also, I've always especially loved the idea of Peter hibernating if he gets too cold. Now that I've mentioned that it almost happened before, I can't get the idea of Peter fighting to stay awake while Tony's trying to find out what's happening out of my head. I might have to write a story about when it happened because I can just see Tony being absolutely terrified and losing his mind because Peter's cold and still and his breathing seems slower and... yeah. I'm probably gonna end up writing that eventually.  
> Let me know what you thought and any ideas you have!


	33. Happy Birthday

**Original Spider @BlackWidow**

Look at the birthday boy.

_[It’s a picture of Peter sitting sideways in Tony’s lap with one arm around his shoulders and the other hand on his chest. He’s grinning wide at something off screen and has a[‘Happy Birthday’ crown ](https://www.google.com/search?rlz=1C1CHBD_enUS720US720&biw=1600&bih=789&tbm=isch&sa=1&ei=Bo9aXYHlBtLs_QaL0pbADA&q=birthday+crown+red&oq=birthday+crown+red&gs_l=img.3...13049.13493..13541...0.0..0.75.211.3......0....1..gws-wiz-img.......0i67j0j0i5i30j0i8i30.ciCKGBVuiLc&ved=0ahUKEwiBgPyG8Y7kAhVSdt8KHQupBcgQ4dUDCAY&uact=5#imgrc=7Yds5njUZ5CfJM)sitting slightly crooked on his curls. Tony’s got one arm wrapped around Peter’s waist and his other hand on his thigh, also grinning at whatever it is they’re looking at.]_

**Friendly Neighborhood @Spiderman**

I told you guys I didn’t want a party.

**The Other Guy @BruceBanner**

And yet, here we are.

**First Bird Avenger @Hawkeye**

Come on, Peter. You only turn 32 once!

**Thunderstruck @Thor**

Yes, little spider. It is a cause for celebration!

**Friendly Neighborhood @Spiderman**

**@Thor** I thought I told you to stop calling me ‘little spider’.

**Friggason @Loki**

**@Spiderman** Well, you are very short compared to the two of us.

**Thunderstruck @Thor**

**@Spiderman** Yes, also very young.

**You Know Who I Am @IronMan**

**@Thor @Loki** We’re all young next to you two. Even Steve and Bucky.

**Tired Old Man @BuckyBarnes**

What were those two even smiling about in this particular picture?

**Original Spider @BlackWidow**

This one was when Wanda brought the cake out. _[SpiderCake.jpg](https://www.google.com/search?rlz=1C1CHBD_enUS720US720&biw=1600&bih=789&tbm=isch&sa=1&ei=WoVPXdPBDcWE5wKaqo6gCg&q=spider+web+cake&oq=spider+web+cake&gs_l=img.3..0l5j0i7i30j0i7i5i30l2j0i8i30j0i24.35805.36190..36308...0.0..0.93.303.4......0....1..gws-wiz-img.......0i8i7i30.zWEJ0Xqm2BE&ved=0ahUKEwjT1q-k6vnjAhVFwlkKHRqVA6QQ4dUDCAY&uact=5#imgrc=462yIqBnmRZp_M:)_

**Iced Americano @CaptainAmerica**

**@ScarletWitch** The cake was perfect, Wanda.

**Better Bird Avenger @Falcon**

**@ScarletWitch** Yeah, Wanda. It looked great!

**Witchy Woman @ScarletWitch**

Aw, thanks guys!

**Friendly Neighborhood @Spiderman**

It was great and I appreciate it, but you guys didn’t have to do all this. Everything from everybody was too much.

**You Know Who I Am @IronMan**

**@Spiderman** Just accept it, sweetheart. You deserved everything today.

**Friendly Neighborhood @Spiderman**

**@IronMan** Tony. You made me an entirely new suit. A _multimillion-dollar_ suit.

**You Know Who I Am @IronMan**

**@Spiderman** You deserve to be as safe as I can possibly make you.

**Friendly Neighborhood @Spiderman**

**@IronMan** Thank you, honey.

**First Bird Avenger @Hawkeye**

**@IronMan** Hey, what do you know, Peter’s personal safety was also the idea for the joint gift from all of us!

**Friendly Neighborhood @Spiderman**

…yeah, that gift in particular is really gonna come in handy. [_PaintWater.jpg_](https://www.google.com/search?q=paint+water+mugs&rlz=1C1CHBD_enUS720US720&source=lnms&tbm=isch&sa=X&ved=0ahUKEwj-mOLx4fnjAhVJmeAKHV6LBLYQ_AUIEigC&biw=1600&bih=789#imgrc=NKiaI7rsGZAM9M)

[ ](https://www.google.com/search?q=paint+water+mugs&rlz=1C1CHBD_enUS720US720&source=lnms&tbm=isch&sa=X&ved=0ahUKEwj-mOLx4fnjAhVJmeAKHV6LBLYQ_AUIEigC&biw=1600&bih=789#imgrc=NKiaI7rsGZAM9M)

**Spiderman Replied To Me!!! @SpideyStan1**

Happy birthday, Spidey!!! I love that they gave him a party even when he said not to!!! #AvengersFamily

**Look At All Those Chickens @ImADuck**

Happy birthday!!! Look at them!!! And Tony made him a new suit to keep him safe!!! #OTP #IronSpider

**Goodbye Lucy @LucilleSanders**

Happy birthday, Peter! I can’t wait to see the new suit!!

**Bi Bi Bi @ImNotInvisible**

Happy birthday!!! LMAO at his new mugs. Only real family helps you out while low-key roasting you like that. #AvengersFamily

**Im Doing My Best @AmIThough**

Wait. Wait. Wait. Spiderman has been around for at least fifteen years… Peter just turned 32…

**I Hate White Vans @DanielPerez**

**@AmIThough** Oh my god, you’re right. How long has Peter been swinging around New York?!?

**I Cant Pick One @AvengersStan**

Happy birthday, Spidey!!! I can’t wait to see the new suit, but I will admit that I half expected Tony to get him a dog for his birthday…

**Paws and More @QueensAnimalShelter**

**@AvengersStan** Us too. Now, we’re expecting to see them around Christmas time.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> MCU Peter Parker's birthday is August 10, so, here we are!  
> I did think about Tony getting Peter a dog for his birthday but then decided this would be the perfect time to introduce the Iron Spider (ha!) suit. Just to clarify, this is the very protective, very cool nanobot suit from Infinity War. This means that Tony also has his suit from Infinity war at this point. (Just the suits, though. There will be no dusting in this universe. Not today, Thanos! Not ever!)  
> By the way, I re-watched Tom's Lip Sync Battle performance for the hundredth time and have decided that I would really like to do a chapter where Peter does his Umbrella dance. The problem is, I can't figure out how to do it. Basically, I just want to have everyone's reactions to his extremely impressive dancing (especially Tony). Any ideas for how to make it work?  
> Let me know what you thought and any ideas you have!


	34. Under My Umbrella

**Pumped Up Kicks @BabySpiderling**

Alright, everybody. **@Spiderman** lost a bet so now I get to post this video from last year. Enjoy.

_[It’s a video of Peter dancing to Singing in the Rain followed by[Umbrella](https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=b0nNTklOKRA).]_

**Better Bird Avenger @Falcon**

…oh my god.

**First Bird Avenger @Hawkeye**

What the hell?

**Iced Americano @CaptainAmerica**

**@Spiderman** Peter, when was this?

**Tired Old Man @BuckyBarnes**

**@Spiderman** Peter, why this?

**Friendly Neighborhood @Spiderman**

It was Sara’s birthday last year. There was a competition at a club she goes to sometimes. She talked me into it.

**Iced Americano @CaptainAmerica**

Why would you ever let Sara talk you into anything?

**Original Spider @BlackWidow**

**@Spiderman** I thought you only knew ballet.

**Friendly Neighborhood @Spiderman**

**@BlackWidow** I never lied. I just held certain truths back.

**Witchy Woman @ScarletWitch**

Peter, you’re so good! I just- oh my god.

**First Bird Avenger @Hawkeye**

Wait. Wait. Wait. Where’s Tony?

**Better Bird Avenger @Falcon**

Where’s Tony? **@IronMan**

**Tired Old Man @BuckyBarnes**

**@IronMan** Tony? Are you okay after seeing this?

**Iced Americano @CaptainAmerica**

Leave him alone, guys. **@IronMan** Really, though, are you okay?

**You Know Who I Am @IronMan**

**@Spiderman** …you told me about this last year. You said Sara wanted you to join a dance competition with her.

**Friendly Neighborhood @Spiderman**

**@IronMan** Again, I didn’t lie. I just held certain truths back.

**You Know Who I Am @IronMan**

**@Spiderman** You didn’t tell me you were gonna be doing this! I could’ve been there!

**Friendly Neighborhood @Spiderman**

**@IronMan** Honey, it’s okay. You were in Japan on business at the time anyway.

**You Know Who I Am @IronMan**

**@Spiderman** Screw business! I could have flown back!I could have watched that in person!

**Original Spider @BlackWidow**

**@Spiderman @IronMan** If Tony had been there in person to see _that_ then you two probably would have gotten together a lot sooner.

**Witchy Woman @ScarletWitch**

**@BlackWidow** Oh, 100%.

**You Know Who I Am @IronMan**

…yeah, most likely. **@Spiderman** I just- _wow_ , sweetheart.

 

 

**Look At All Those Chickens @ImADuck**

…Tony Stark is a very lucky man. #IronSpider

**Spiderman Replied To Me!!! @SpideyStan1**

Look at him!!! He is the very definition of ‘get you a man that can do both’.

**Theres A Bee!!??!! @EthanyWithaB**

Okay, I was shocked enough to be seeing Peter in a suit again. I was not expecting that song change!!!

**Leslie More Like Lesbian @GirlsLoveGirls**

Alright, Peter Parker looks good enough in drag that it is making even my proud lesbian self question some things.

**Winter Never Left @AstridHaugen**

My eternal thanks to **@BabySpiderling** for both making this happen in the first place and then for sharing it with the world.

**I Hate White Vans @DanielPerez**

Rihanna is definitely not Peter’s type of music. Who do we have to thank for suggesting the actual song and dance?

**Goodbye Lucy @LucilleSanders**

**@DanielPerez** Most likely also Sara. The other spiderlings probably also had something to do with it.

**Bi Bi Bi @ImNotInvisible**

Peter Parker dancing in a suit followed by Peter Parker dancing in Rihanna drag. What a time to be bisexual.

**More Like Hurricane Tortilla @KatrinaGranger**

Somebody get RuPaul on the phone right now!

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So, just imagine that Sara did Zendaya's performance for this competition.  
> I know, I know. It's been almost a week. Honestly, this fic might go back to the once-a-week update schedule that I was on in the very beginning because 1. my college classes start again on August 23 and 2. I got hit by inspiration for an entirely new story in an entirely different fandom that I'm writing on Wattpad. It's a Disney's Descendants story called 'A Fifth Descendant'. So, if you're into that fandom feel free to go over to Wattpad and give it a read! My username on that website is also LadyArtemis13.  
> P.S. I'm not saying that Peter gave Tony a personal encore of his Umbrella dance later that night. I'm just saying you guys can use your imaginations as you wish.  
> Let me know what you thought and any ideas you might have!


	35. Phoenix

**I’ve Got A @WeirdQuestion**

**@IronMan** Weird question but here we go: Where is the tattoo that none of the other Avengers have seen (besides Peter obviously)?

**You Know Who I Am @IronMan**

**@WeirdQuestion** Did the others put you up to this?

**First Bird Avenger @Hawkeye**

**@IronMan** We did not but you should still answer the question.

**Better Bird Avenger @Falcon**

**@IronMan** Yeah, Tony. Where is it?

**You Know Who I Am @IronMan**

Why do you guys want to know so badly?

**Tired Old Man @BuckyBarnes**

I, personally, have twenty dollars on it being an ass tattoo.

**Better Bird Avenger @Falcon**

Me too.

**First Bird Avenger @Hawkeye**

Me and **@CaptainAmerica** said it’s not and **@BlackWidow** wasn’t allowed to participate.

**Friendly Neighborhood @Spiderman**

**@CaptainAmerica** Steve! You, too?

**Iced Americano @CaptainAmerica**

**@Spiderman** It seemed like easy money.

**Witchy Woman @ScarletWitch**

It is good to see that you boys have finally learned not to bet with Natasha.

**Original Spider @BlackWidow**

**@ScarletWitch** It took them long enough.

**First Bird Avenger @Hawkeye**

It was a hard-learned lesson.

**Tired Old Man @BuckyBarnes**

**@IronMan** So, where is it?

**You Know Who I Am @IronMan**

It’s on my back, okay? It’s on my back.

**Iced Americano @CaptainAmerica**

**@BuckyBarnes @Falcon** We’ll take cash.

**Better Bird Avenger @Falcon**

Fine.

**Witchy Woman @ScarletWitch**

**@IronMan** Is it, like, your shoulder blade or full back?

**You Know Who I Am @IronMan**

It’s pretty much a full back piece.

**Friendly Neighborhood @Spiderman**

**@IronMan** It’s definitely one of my favorite pieces I’ve ever done.

**You Know Who I Am @IronMan**

**@Spiderman** It’s beautiful, sweetheart. All of your work is.

**Better Bird Avenger @Falcon**

**@IronMan @Spiderman** Alright. Alright. Before you two start getting all nauseating, what is it?

**You Know Who I Am @IronMan**

It’s a phoenix.

**Iced Americano @CaptainAmerica**

Wait, when exactly did you get this tattoo?

**Friendly Neighborhood @Spiderman**

2008.

**Original Spider @BlackWidow**

**@IronMan** …after you announced you were Iron Man?

**You Know Who I Am @IronMan**

Peter showed me the design the night of the press conference.

**First Bird Avenger @Hawkeye**

I’ve said it before, and I’ll say it again: they really are perfect for each other. #IronSpider

 

 

**Spiderman Replied To Me!!! @SpideyStan1**

Right after the press conference… right after he announced himself as a hero… not long after he stopped manufacturing weapons… I am crying!!!! #IronSpider

**Theres A Bee!!??!! @EthanyWithaB**

**@SpideyStan1** Same! My English major heart can’t take the symbolism!!!

**Leslie More Like Lesbian @GirlsLoveGirls**

I love that Natasha isn’t even allowed to participate in their bets anymore. #AvengersFamily

**Look At All Those Chickens @ImADuck**

Aaawww, of course one of Peter’s favorite pieces is one he did for Tony!!! #IronSpider

**More Like Hurricane Tortilla @KatrinaGranger**

Okay, at this point I’m convinced that there is always at least one bet running in Avengers Tower. #AvengersFamily

**It Is What I Think @RebeccaLopez**

I really want to see that tattoo (along with all the others he did for the Avengers).

**Hello Darkness @MyOldFriend**

**@RebeccaLopez** Me too, but I’m also kinda fine if they don’t ever show us because I feel like they might be really personal? I don’t know, man.

**Ten Points To Slytherin @Page394**

Peter’s covered in tattoos and has said before that he’d have to be basically naked to see them all. So, the real question is, does _he_ have an ass tattoo?

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> As an English major myself, the symbolism of pairing Tony Stark with a phoenix, right down to the red and gold feathers/suit... It definitely gets me, you know?  
> Does Peter have an ass tattoo? Even I don't know. On one hand, I want to say yes for very obvious reasons. On the other hand, the idea of marking one of the most famous asses in the superhero world... I mean, Peter's right up there with Dick Grayson. So, I'll probably just leave that open to your imaginations.  
> Let me know what you thought and any ideas you might have!


	36. Actual Cost

**Witchy Woman @ScarletWitch**

This is the look we get for suggesting he actually get in the water instead of just laying by the pool.

_[It’s a picture of Peter[relaxing in a pool-side lounge chair.](https://www.google.com/search?q=tom+holland+hawaiian+shirt&rlz=1C1CHBD_enUS720US720&sxsrf=ACYBGNQ9INtiKYDCDetl6PU4dOCEAP5BNQ:1568015401961&source=lnms&tbm=isch&sa=X&ved=0ahUKEwjp4qTIoMPkAhWDnOAKHYLKAaMQ_AUIEigB&biw=1600&bih=789#imgrc=gmpDhQXYO7f-gM) He’s wearing a red Hawaiian shirt and a pair of sunglasses that definitely belong to Tony. He’s giving the photographer a look that clearly conveys just how little he thinks of their suggestion.]_

**Original Spider @BlackWidow**

You can’t see it in this picture, but Tony was in the chair beside him with the exact same look.

**Better Bird Avenger @Falcon**

**@Spiderman @IronMan** Honestly, you two pick up way too many mannerisms from each other.

**Friendly Neighborhood @Spiderman**

I mean, yeah. That’s what happens when you’re around someone for so long.

**You Know Who I Am @IronMan**

True. Besides, we don’t really swim. There’s nothing wrong with that.

**Iced Americano @CaptainAmerica**

Why don’t you two like to swim?

**Friendly Neighborhood @Spiderman**

Let’s just say we’ve both had some bad experiences with water and leave it at that.

**Iced Americano @CaptainAmerica**

Fair enough. I think we all understand not wanting to talk about bad experiences.

**First Bird Avenger @Hawkeye**

While we’re asking questions though **@Spiderman** how did you manage to go through an entire bottle of sunscreen in a day?!?

**You Know Who I Am @IronMan**

It’s not that uncommon.

**Tired Old Man @BuckyBarnes**

Yeah, he put on a full coat of it when we went to the park, too.

**Friendly Neighborhood @Spiderman**

I never spend extended periods of time in the sun without protection. Do you know how much the ink on my body is worth?

**First Bird Avenger @Hawkeye**

…I’ve actually never thought about that before.

**Witchy Woman @ScarletWitch**

**@Spiderman** Do we want to know how much?

**Friendly Neighborhood @Spiderman**

Probably not.

**Tired Old Man @BuckyBarnes**

Yes, we do. Now we’re curious.

**Original Spider @BlackWidow**

**@Spiderman @IronMan** Don’t even try to tell us you two dorks haven’t done the math. How much is all that ink actually worth?

**Friendly Neighborhood @Spiderman**

…True. We have. How about a ballpark figure?

**Better Bird Avenger @Falcon**

That works.

**You Know Who I Am @IronMan**

Several thousand dollars.

**Tired Old Man @BuckyBarnes**

Aaaand, Stevie looks like he’s about to have a heart attack.

 

 

**Spiderman Replied To Me!!! @SpideyStan1**

If looks could kill…

**Look At All Those Chickens @ImADuck**

They said Tony was in the chair beside him. See that arm he’s got out to the side? They were 100% sitting there holding hands. #IronSpider #OTP

**Im Doing My Best @AmIThough**

Okay, while I love Peter in that shirt, are you kidding me?!? They’re at the pool and we still don’t get to see any more of his tattoos!

**More Like Hurricane Tortilla @KatrinaGranger**

Man, I’m with Clint. I never really thought about how much those tattoos would actually cost…

**I Cant Pick One @AvengersStan**

I love that they apparently have, at some point, sat down and done the math. #IronSpider

**It Is What I Think @RebeccaLopez**

I paid a couple hundred dollars for a tattoo and almost had a heart attack.

**Bi Bi Bi @ImNotInvisible**

I wanna see the ‘several thousand dollars’ worth of tattoos!!!!

**Hello Darkness @MyOldFriend**

Steve casually mentioning that they’ve all got bad experiences they don’t talk about makes my heart hurt.

 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> It's late but it's here. I've kinda hit that writer's block for this story in particular. Though, I did write a couple of chapters for when the holidays come around, so, those are ready for November/December.  
> Side note, I have been getting a lot of ideas for stories in other fandoms. Depending on which one(s) I actually finish, I might be posting some of them. So, keep an eye out if you're in the following fandoms: Harry Potter, Percy Jackson, Young Justice/Batman/DC in general, Descendants, and How to Train Your Dragon.  
> Let me know what you thought and any ideas you might have!


	37. Pumpkin Spice

**Friendly Neighborhood @Spiderman**

Alright, guys. It’s officially October. The dreaded pumpkin spice season has begun.

**Witchy Woman @ScarletWitch**

What do you have against pumpkin spice?

**You Know Who I Am @IronMan**

**@ScarletWitch** It’s the cinnamon.

**Iced Americano @CaptainAmerica**

**@Spiderman** Let me guess: cinnamon is a spider repellent?

**Friendly Neighborhood @Spiderman**

Yeah.

**Tired Old Man @BuckyBarnes**

**@Spiderman** So, if I were to come into the tower with, say, a pumpkin spice latte….?

**Friendly Neighborhood @Spiderman**

I would avoid you. I would actively avoid you.

**Better Bird Avenger @Falcon**

Good to know.

**First Bird Avenger @Hawkeye**

Wait, but I just bought a pumpkin spice candle.

**Original Spider @BlackWidow**

**@Hawkeye** _You_ bought a pumpkin spice candle?

**First Bird Avenger @Hawkeye**

Yes, I did. With absolutely no shame.

**Iced Americano @CaptainAmerica**

**@Hawkeye** Clint, you never have any shame. About anything.

**Witchy Woman @ScarletWitch**

That is unfortunately true.

**You Know Who I Am @IronMan**

**@Hawkeye** Yeah, you’re not allowed to burn that in this tower.

**You Know Who I Am @IronMan**

In fact, all pumpkin spice products are banned from the tower.

**Friendly Neighborhood @Spiderman**

**@IronMan** Honey, you can’t just ban all pumpkin spice.

**You Know Who I Am @IronMan**

Too late. Already done.

**Friendly Neighborhood @Spiderman**

**@Hawkeye** You can keep the candle as long as you only burn it in your room.

**You Know Who I Am @IronMan**

**@Hawkeye** No you can’t.

**Better Bird Avenger @Falcon**

**@Spiderman** What happens if he burns it around you?

**Friendly Neighborhood @Spiderman**

I’ll basically just have an allergic reaction. Small amounts are okay, but if it’s concentrated like a candle it can get pretty bad.

**Tired Old Man @BuckyBarnes**

So, pure cinnamon would be worse?

**Friendly Neighborhood @Spiderman**

Pure cinnamon would be more along the lines of a _severe_ allergic reaction.

**You Know Who I Am @IronMan**

No cinnamon in the tower either.

**Friendly Neighborhood @Spiderman**

Tony…

**Original Spider @BlackWidow**

**@Spiderman** No, младший брат, I agree.

**Friendly Neighborhood @Spiderman**

I am a grown man. I know how to safely handle my allergies.

**You Know Who I Am @IronMan**

**@Spiderman** Sweetheart, I remember what happened last time you accidently ingested cinnamon. I don’t want that to happen again.

**Friendly Neighborhood @Spiderman**

**@IronMan** It won’t, honey. That’s why we made the EpiPen specifically for my mutation.

**You Know Who I Am @IronMan**

**@Spiderman** I’m not taking any chances.

**Iced Americano @CaptainAmerica**

…you two had to specially make one?

**Witchy Woman @ScarletWitch**

No cinnamon in the tower.

**First Bird Avenger @Hawkeye**

I’m throwing away that candle.  

 

 

**Spiderman Replied To Me!!! @SpideyStan1**

...I am suddenly so worried about pumpkin spice season.

**Look At All Those Chickens @ImADuck**

Okay, but, protective Tony is so cute! #IronSpider

**I Cant Pick One @AvengersStan**

They all got so protective!! #AvengersFamily

**Leslie More Like Lesbian @GirlsLoveGirls**

Still living for Natasha calling Peter ‘little brother’.

**I Know How To Pronounce My State @ItShouldBeArKansas**

I love pumpkin spice. Thankfully, I live in Arkansas and don’t have to worry about endangering Spidey.

**Goodbye Lucy @LucilleSanders**

*Adam Scott Voice* The pumpkin spice… betrayed us?!?

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm back!! I hit a bit of writer's block for this story but, with the Fall/Halloween season, I now have some ideas!  
> I've also got some chapters already written for Christmas/Hanukkah/Yule. (Yeah, I said Yule. Thor and Loki have got to represent!)  
> Let me know what you thought and any ideas you might have!


	38. Knitting Needles

**Better Bird Avenger @Falcon**

Peter is teaching Bucky to knit, and it might sound cute, but he just threatened me with a knitting needle, so…

**Iced Americano @CaptainAmerica**

**@Falcon** Did you deserve it?

**Better Bird Avenger @Falcon**

No!

**Original Spider @BlackWidow**

He probably deserved it.

**First Bird Avenger @Hawkeye**

**@BuckyBarnes** How do you have the patience to sit there and learn how to knit?

**Tired Old Man @BuckyBarnes**

…Clint, I’m a sniper.

**Witchy Woman @ScarletWitch**

Clint, _you’re_ a sniper. How could you not have the patience?

**First Bird Avenger @Hawkeye**

**@ScarletWitch** That’s different.

**You Know Who I Am @IronMan**

**@Hawkeye** Sometimes, you just don’t make any sense. You know that, right?

**First Bird Avenger @Hawkeye**

I am well aware, yes.

**Friendly Neighborhood @Spiderman**

**@BuckyBarnes** You’re doing great, Bucky! You’ll have a blanket made in no time.

**Witchy Woman @ScarletWitch**

Aaaw, he just sat up all self-satisfied because he got a compliment from the teacher.

**Original Spider @BlackWidow**

He looks so proud of himself.

**Tired Old Man @BuckyBarnes**

**@ScarletWitch @BlackWidow** Leave me alone.

**You Know Who I Am @IronMan**

**@BuckyBarnes** Why’d you suddenly want to learn how to knit anyway?

**Tired Old Man @BuckyBarnes**

…I like using my metal arm to make something instead of to fight. I like that it can be more than just a weapon.

**Iced Americano @CaptainAmerica**

Of course it can! You’re not just a weapon, Bucky. You know you can talk to me when you start feeling that way.

**Tired Old Man @BuckyBarnes**

I know, Stevie. I promise I will.

**Friendly Neighborhood @Spiderman**

**@BuckyBarnes** We can make all the blankets you want! I will make you an expert!

**You Know Who I Am @IronMan**

**@Spiderman** Calm down, sweetheart. **@BuckyBarnes** You can order all of the softest and most expensive yarns you want.

**Tired Old Man @BuckyBarnes**

**@IronMan** That’s good, because Jenny stole a lot of it.

**Better Bird Avenger @Falcon**

Okay, yes, this is all very sweet. I will, however, remind you all: he threatened me with a knitting needle!

**Tired Old Man @BuckyBarnes**

**@Falcon** Yeah, but it was in my right hand.

 

 

**Spiderman Replied To Me!!! @SpideyStan1**

Peter just casually starting a knitting circle in Avengers Tower. #AvengersFamily

**It Is What I Think @RebeccaLopez**

This is so wholesome! (Except maybe Sam getting threatened…)

**Leslie More Like Lesbian @GirlsLoveGirls**

I love Wanda and Natasha calling Bucky out. *cough* teacher’s pet *cough*

**Road Work Ahead @NotAConstructionWorker**

Okay, but did Sam deserve it?

**Theres A Bee!!??!! @EthanyWithaB**

Steve immediately reassuring Bucky!!! #OTP #Stucky

**Ten Points To Slytherin @Page394**

I love how Bucky implies that they’re just letting Jenny steal all of the yarn she wants.

**Hello Darkness @MyOldFriend**

Do I love Steve immediately reassuring Bucky he’s more than a weapon? Yes. Does my heart hurt because he thought that at all? Also yes.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Yes, Bucky is learning to knit. Yes, there is a plan for all the blankets they're going to make.  
> Let me know what you thought and any ideas you have!


	39. #Dads

**The Responsible One @FirstSpiderling**

Diego’s going on vacation to visit some of his family in Bolivia. Actual conversation I witnessed today:

_Peter: You’ve got your passport?_

_Diego: Yes, Boss._

_Peter: You bought your plane ticket? You know exactly when your flight leaves?_

_Diego: Yes, Boss._

_Peter: Make sure you get to the airport early, just in case._

_Diego: I know, Boss._

_Peter: Be careful. Stay safe. Call me when you land and if you need anything._

_Diego: What are you gonna do all the way from New York?_

_Peter: I’ve done the math. I can be there in the jet in just a few hours._

**Hablo Español @SecondSpiderling**

He wasn’t even joking. He really would fly all the way to South America if I called him.

**Pumped Up Kicks @BabySpiderling**

Aw, he just worries. **@Spiderman** Don’t you, Chief?

**Friendly Neighborhood @Spiderman**

I will not apologize for worrying about you guys.

**The Responsible One @First Spiderling**

**@Spiderman** It’s sweet.

**Friendly Neighborhood @Spiderman**

Mainly because you three are walking disasters.

**Hablo Español @SecondSpiderling**

Okay, slightly less sweet.

**Pumped Up Kicks @BabySpiderling**

But, not inaccurate.

**The Responsible One @FirstSpiderling**

**@Spiderman** To be fair, you’re right there beside us most of the time.

**Friendly Neighborhood @Spiderman**

Only because I’m trying to corral you three.

**Hablo Español @SecondSpiderling**

Do I need to remind you of the poker game?

**Pumped Up Kicks @BabySpiderling**

Yeah, you were cheating just as much as the rest of us.

**Friendly Neighborhood @Spiderman**

I don’t know what you’re talking about.

**You Know Who I Am @IronMan**

**@Spiderman** Sweetheart, you absolutely cheat at cards.

**Friendly Neighborhood @Spiderman**

**@IronMan** You’re supposed to be on my side!

**Pumped Up Kicks @BabySpiderling**

**@IronMan** You both cheat at cards. **@Spiderman** You’re the one that taught us!

**You Know Who I Am @IronMan**

…fair enough.

**Friendly Neighborhood @Spiderman**

…yeah, I guess I did.

**The Responsible One @FirstSpiderling**

We really shouldn’t have expected any different from two geniuses that can count multiple decks at once.

**Hablo Español @SecondSpiderling**

**@First Spiderling** True.

 

 

**Spiderman Replied To Me!!! @SpideyStan1**

I can’t even explain how much I love this family. #SpiderDad #IronDad

**Look At All Those Chickens @ImADuck**

I am so soft!!! Look at them parenting the spiderlings!!! #IronSpider #SpiderDad #IronDad

**It Is What I Think @RebeccaLopez**

‘call me when you land’ That is such a parent thing to say. #SpiderDad

**In Front Of My Salad!!! @IDon’tEvenLikeSalad**

I would 100% watch a heist movie about Tony, Peter, and the spiderlings taking down a casino.

**Road Work Ahead @NotAConstructionWorker**

**@IDon’tEvenLikeSalad** Absolutely. Where do I sign to make that happen?

**Theres A Bee!!??!! @EthanyWithaB**

I can’t believe Peter cheats. I mean, he somehow seems so innocent?!?

**I Hate White Vans @DanielPerez**

Like fathers like children. #SpiderDad #IronDad

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Yes, they both cheat at any and all card games. Everyone else quickly learned not to let them sit beside each other. (Not that separating them did much.)  
> Also, they could definitely rob a casino blind if they wanted. This realization may or may not have led several people to be suddenly very thankful that the two of them are on the 'good' side.  
> Let me know what you thought and any ideas you might have!


	40. Meet Lola

**Friendly Neighborhood @Spiderman**

Look at our new family member! Everybody meet Lola!

_[It’s a picture of a gray[Pit Bull mix](https://www.google.com/search?rlz=1C1CHBD_enUS720US720&biw=1600&bih=789&tbm=isch&sxsrf=ACYBGNS50tkAw-JmfHYnceKP7lq2KRtvyA%3A1571269595309&sa=1&ei=26unXYnBEqKJggf1nKGYAw&q=american+pit+bull+terrier+gray&oq=american+pit+bull+terrier+gray&gs_l=img.3..0.11526.12213..12629...0.0..0.81.371.5......0....1..gws-wiz-img.......0i8i30j0i10i30j0i30j0i24.J-joEeYK1ps&ved=0ahUKEwjJmsyw-6HlAhWihOAKHXVOCDMQ4dUDCAc&uact=5#imgrc=0SUws2HAhBEFRM:). She’s got her mouth open and her tongue hanging out, so it looks like she’s smiling. There’s a pink and yellow bandana tied around her neck.]_

**First Bird Avenger @Hawkeye**

I love her.

**Original Spider @BlackWidow**

**@Hawkeye** They haven’t even gotten back to the tower with her yet.

**First Bird Avenger @Hawkeye**

**@BlackWidow** Doesn’t matter. She’s a dog and so I love her.

**Better Bird Avenger @Falcon**

**@IronMan** Already? You are so whipped.

**You Know Who I Am @IronMan**

**@Falcon** Shut up, Sam.

**You Know Who I Am @IronMan**

**@Spiderman** We have a cat and we have a dog. We’re done now, right?

**Friendly Neighborhood @Spiderman**

**@IronMan** I’m satisfied. Thank you, honey.

**Iced Americano @CaptainAmerica**

She’s cute. What about Jenny, though? Are they gonna get along?

**Witchy Woman @ScarletWitch**

**@CaptainAmerica** They took Jenny to the shelter with them to make sure.

**Tired Old Man @BuckyBarnes**

I was wondering where she’d gotten to.

**You Know Who I Am @IronMan**

They get along just fine.

**Friendly Neighborhood @Spiderman**

_[It’s a picture of Jenny standing on her hind legs with her front paws pressed against Lola’s chest. Lola is licking her in the face.]_

**Original Spider @BlackWidow**

Okay, that’s adorable.

**First Bird Avenger @Hawkeye**

**@IronMan @Spiderman** Hurry up and get back to the tower!

 

 

 

**Spiderman Replied To Me!!! @SpideyStan1**

Look at her little bandana! The #AvengersFamily just keeps growing and I am here for it.

**Look At All Those Chickens @ImADuck**

Aw, Tony and Peter got a new daughter! #IronSpider

**Bi Bi Bi @ImNotInvisible**

“She’s a dog and so I love her.” I felt that.

**Ten Points To Slytherin @Page394**

I love that they took Jenny with them to be sure they’d get along.

**More Like Hurricane Tortilla @KatrinaGranger**

**@Page394** We stan responsible pet dads.

**Goodbye Lucy @LucilleSanders**

Jenny got a sister! When will Lola get to meet her cousin Sophia? #AvengersFamily

**Winter Never Left @AstridHaugen**

I love that they get all their animals from a shelter. Lola is gonna have such a good life!

**Paws and More @QueensAnimalShelter**

We were so happy to see **@Spiderman** and **@IronMan** again. Lola was dropped off at our shelter because her previous owner didn’t want to deal with the responsibilities of a grown dog. We know she’ll be happy and well taken care of at Avengers Tower!

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Much like Sophia and Jenny, Lola only just started existing but I would die for her already.  
> I did think of them getting either a miniature poodle or a Boykin spaniel but then I figured 'What types of dogs are commonly left at animal shelters?'. The answer: pit bulls and pit bull mixes. Plus, I love that Peter is a tattoo artist covered in ink and piercings, now with pit bull, but still the biggest cinnamon roll there is. Away with your stereotypes!  
> Let me know what you thought and any ideas you have!


	41. Fall Festival

**The Other Guy @BruceBanner**

**@IronMan** I feel like we’re going to regret this.

_[It’s a picture of Peter and Thor at what looks like some kind of fall festival, each with a large stick of cotton candy in hand. Thor has on a simple long-sleeved shirt and jeans, seemingly not bothered at all by the weather. Peter, however, has on a thick gray hoodie and a ‘Stark Industries’ beanie.]_

**You Know Who I Am @IronMan**

If they get too hyped up on sugar, then we’ll just put them in the training room to spar the energy off.

**Thunderstruck @Thor**

Cotton candy is one of the greatest human creations I have found yet.

**Original Spider @BlackWidow**

**@Thor** It’s nothing but pure sugar.

**Thunderstruck @Thor**

Absolutely genius.

**Friendly Neighborhood @Spiderman**

**@Thor** Just wait until you have a caramel apple.

**Thunderstruck @Thor**

That sounds amazing. We’ll go there next.

**You Know Who I Am @IronMan**

**@BruceBanner** I see what you meant.

**Better Bird Avenger @Falcon**

Just be happy Clint’s not joining them on their sugar high.

**Witchy Woman @ScarletWitch**

Where is he anyway? **@BlackWidow** and I stopped to get our faces painted and I haven’t seen him since.

**Original Spider @BlackWidow**

He’s probably at the shooting games.

**Iced Americano @CaptainAmerica**

He is. **@Hawkeye** and **@BuckyBarnes** are competing on the shooting game.

**The Other Guy @BruceBanner**

They do know the game is more than likely rigged, right?

**First Bird Avenger @Hawkeye**

Yeah, but that’s not the point.

**Tired Old Man @BuckyBarnes**

I have to prove I’m the better shot, even at a rigged carnival game.

**First Bird Avenger @Hawkeye**

I think you mean  _I’m_ the better shot.

**Better Bird Avenger @Falcon**

They’ve been arguing about it for the last fifteen minutes.

**Iced Americano @CaptainAmerica**

We’re probably gonna be here a while.

**Witchy Woman @ScarletWitch**

**@CaptainAmerica** Is **@Loki** with you? He teleported away and hasn’t come back yet.

**Friggason @Loki**

I simply went to check on the girls. Everyone is getting along splendidly.

_[It’s a picture of Lola sleeping in a fluffy dog bed. Jenny is curled up on her back while Sophia is laying pressed up against her side.]_

**Friendly Neighborhood @Spiderman**

Aw, look at them!!!

**Spiderman Replied To Me!!! @SpideyStan1**

Oh, wow. Peter and Thor are gonna be so hyped up.

**Look At All Those Chickens @ImADuck**

I love that Peter is wearing Stark Industries merch. #IronSpider

**Give Me A D @ImNotAEvenACheerleader**

Poor **@Spiderman** looks like he’s already freezing.

**Im Doing My Best @AmIThough**

Aw, I love the #AvengersFamily going to a fall festival together!!

**Leslie More Like Lesbian @GirlsLoveGirls**

I want to see Natasha and Wanda’s face paint.

**Ten Points To Slytherin @Page394**

Loki’s priorities are clearly in order.

**Hello Darkness @MyOldFriend**

Who won though? Bucky or Clint?

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Thor and Peter's sugar high and subsequent crash was the stuff of legends. I'm not sure who won- Clint or Bucky. Use your imaginations. I, personally, like to think Bucky played until he won Steve a stuffed animal then he just didn't care anymore. Clint, on the other hand, won himself a stuffed animal because "he's worth it".  
> Also, yes, the animals have all met and get along great.  
> Let me know what you thought and any ideas you might have!


	42. Protect Their Innocence

**Pumped Up Kicks @BabySpiderling**

**@IronMan** Chief did a thing…

_[It’s a picture of Peter sitting at his tattoo station in Spider’s Parlor. He’s wearing a Motley Crue t-shirt and grinning at the camera with his tongue sticking out, clearly showing the silver barbell in its center.]_

**You Know Who I Am @IronMan**

Oh.

**Original Spider @BlackWidow**

Tony? You okay?

**You Know Who I Am @IronMan**

…I’m fine.

**Better Bird Avenger @Falcon**

He is definitely not fine. **@Spiderman** You broke him.

**Friendly Neighborhood @Spiderman**

**@IronMan** Sorry, honey.

**First Bird Avenger @Hawkeye**

Oh, I’m sure you’ll make it up to him.

**Original Spider @BlackWidow**

Behave, Clint.

**Iced Americano @CaptainAmerica**

What exactly did he do this time?

**Better Bird Avenger @Falcon**

…what?

**Tired Old Man @BuckyBarnes**

And why did Sara tag Tony like that?

**First Bird Avenger @Hawkeye**

Oh my gods. They don’t know.

**Witchy Woman @ScarletWitch**

What don’t they know?

**Better Bird Avenger @Falcon**

None of them know.

**Iced Americano @CaptainAmerica**

Know what?

**First Bird Avenger @Hawkeye**

Well…

**Original Spider @BlackWidow**

**@Hawkeye** No.

**Friendly Neighborhood @Spiderman**

**@Hawkeye** Do not.

**Better Bird Avenger @Falcon**

They’re gonna find out eventually.

**First Bird Avenger @Hawkeye**

Yeah. Let me tell them.

**Original Spider @BlackWidow**

**@Hawkeye** You will not.

**Witchy Woman @ScarletWitch**

I’m starting to think maybe we don’t want to know…

**Tired Old Man @BuckyBarnes**

Ignoring whatever this is for a moment, where’s Tony?

**Better Bird Avenger @Falcon**

**@Spiderman** broke him.

**Friendly Neighborhood @Spiderman**

Sorry, not sorry.

 

 

 

**Spiderman Replied To Me!!! @SpideyStan1**

Such innocence! They must be protected.

**Look At All Those Chickens @ImADuck**

I think he really did break him… #IronSpider

**I Hate White Vans @DanielPerez**

Oh, man. I wish I could be there when they eventually do learn what everybody was talking about.

**Goodbye Lucy @LucilleSanders**

Clint: _[ImGonnaTellHim.gif](https://www.google.com/search?q=frozen+gif+im+gonna+tell+him&rlz=1C1CHBD_enUS720US720&sxsrf=ACYBGNT_21saqSOWWqagdgZh6k1ALgknew:1571893707505&source=lnms&tbm=isch&sa=X&ved=0ahUKEwi50L2wkLTlAhWhmOAKHfGAD2QQ_AUIEigB&biw=1600&bih=789#imgrc=KCvp9l8_iuoVCM:)_

Natasha and Peter: _[DontYouDare.gif](https://www.google.com/search?q=frozen+gif+im+gonna+tell+him&rlz=1C1CHBD_enUS720US720&sxsrf=ACYBGNT_21saqSOWWqagdgZh6k1ALgknew:1571893707505&source=lnms&tbm=isch&sa=X&ved=0ahUKEwi50L2wkLTlAhWhmOAKHfGAD2QQ_AUIEigB&biw=1600&bih=789#imgrc=K6-pcwGBf-j9tM:)_

**Bi Bi Bi @ImNotInvisible**

I am _wheezing._ I don’t think I’ve ever laughed so hard in my life. Protect their innocence!

**Road Work Ahead @NotAConstructionWorker**

Peter really needs to give them a lesson on piercings and what some of them can mean.

**Leslie More Like Lesbian @GirlsLoveGirls**

Such innocent little cinnamon rolls!!!

**Give Me A D @ImNotAEvenACheerleader**

**@GirlsLoveGirls** Yeah, but I think this particular case makes Peter a sinnamon roll.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Oh, what innocent little flowers. After they learned what everyone was talking about, the three of them spent a week blushing every time they saw Peter playing with his new tongue ring.  
> Let me know what you thought and any ideas you might have!


	43. Movie Night

**Witchy Woman @ScarletWitch**

Who decided it was a good idea to put **@Hawkeye** in charge of movies?

**First Bird Avenger @Hawkeye**

Hey, I pick great movies!

**Original Spider @BlackWidow**

You specifically pick bad movies.

**First Bird Avenger @Hawkeye**

That’s because those are the best horror movies! I want to see wires. I want poorly written scripts. I want bad acting.

**You Know Who I Am @IronMan**

**@Hawkeye** Believe me, we’ve noticed.

**Tired Old Man @BuckyBarnes**

I kind of like them.

**Better Bird Avenger @Falcon**

**@BuckyBarnes** Of course you do.

**Tired Old Man @BuckyBarnes**

Let’s be honest: the last thing we all need is to watch a bunch of horror movies with realistic blood and death scenes.

**Better Bird Avenger @Falcon**

…true.

**Iced Americano @CaptainAmerica**

At least he’s set them up chronologically. The special effects should get at least slightly better as we go.

**First Bird Avenger @Hawkeye**

**@CaptainAmerica** I wouldn’t count on it.

**Friendly Neighborhood @Spiderman**

As long as I get to watch The Nightmare Before Christmas then I’m good.

**You Know Who I Am @IronMan**

**@Spiderman** That’s exactly why you weren’t in charge of movies.

**Friendly Neighborhood @Spiderman**

**@IronMan** What do you mean?

**You Know Who I Am @Spiderman**

Sweetheart, if it was up to you, we’d be watching the entire Tim Burton filmography.

**Friendly Neighborhood @Spiderman**

What’s wrong with that?

**You Know Who I Am @IronMan**

I love you but I am not sitting through that again.

**Witchy Woman @ScarletWitch**

Again?

**Original Spider @BlackWidow**

**@Spiderman** How many times have you done that?

**Friendly Neighborhood @Spiderman**

I only talked Tony into it once.

**Friendly Neighborhood @Spiderman**

**@IronMan** Which is fair because you made me sit through hours of Tarantino movies.

**You Know Who I Am @IronMan**

… alright, yeah. Fair enough.

 

 

 

**Spiderman Replied To Me!!! @SpideyStan1**

Honestly, **@Hawkeye** is not wrong. The best horror movies are bad horror movies.

**More Like Hurricane Tortilla @KatrinaGranger**

Yaaasss!!! The Nightmare Before Christmas! The Corpse Bride! Frankenweenie!

**It Is What I Think @RebeccaLopez**

**@KatrinaGranger** Edward Scissorhands! Beetlejuice! Sweeney Todd!

**I Know How To Pronounce My State @ItShouldBeArKansas**

Okay, but, Tony and Peter both have great taste in movies.

**Road Work Ahead @NotAConstructionWorker**

I love #AvengersFamily movie nights!

**Hello Darkness @MyOldFriend**

It makes me hurt that they apparently have to be careful about movies with good special effects because of blood, death scenes, etc.

**Theres A Bee!!??!! @EthanyWithaB**

**@MyOldFriend** I never even thought about stuff like that. I mean, I just watched Saving Private Ryan last night. Can you imagine…?

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Bad horror movies are absolutely the best horror movies and I highly suggest a marathon of Tim Burton's work. It's never a disappointment.  
> The Saving Private Ryan thing? Yeah, I fully believe that the other Avengers have come to the unanimous decision that Steve and Bucky are not allowed near it. Much like the banned cinnamon, there is a list of movies/shows that would likely be triggers for various team mates. Everyone knows about The List and appreciates the thought and care that goes into it.  
> Let me know what you thought and any ideas you might have!


	44. Winternights

**Friendly Neighborhood @Spiderman**

I love the tattoos people want in October.

**Witchy Woman @ScarletWitch**

What do you mean?

**Friendly Neighborhood @Spiderman**

People tend to want monster and horror tattoos in October more than any other time of year.

**You Know Who I Am @IronMan**

**@Spiderman** Which one was your favorite this year?

**Friendly Neighborhood @Spiderman**

_[Cthulhu.jpg](https://www.google.com/search?rlz=1C1CHBD_enUS720US720&biw=1600&bih=789&tbm=isch&sxsrf=ACYBGNT2iDIWB00RJTHcFRUnFS2i1ZutaA%3A1572503811049&sa=1&ei=A4G6XcjEAsSQ5gKoxqOgDA&q=cthulhu+tattoo&oq=cthulu+tattoo&gs_l=img.1.1.0j0i10l9.64977.67623..68947...0.0..0.160.1014.12j1......0....1..gws-wiz-img.......35i39j0i131j0i67j0i131i67.z6YxqLvWLoo#imgrc=5SN1DJuebN1mbM) _

**Better Bird Avenger @Falcon**

…you did that?

**Iced Americano @CaptainAmerica**

That’s kind of horrifying, Peter.

**Tired Old Man @BuckyBarnes**

**@CaptainAmerica** I think that’s the point, Stevie.

**Original Spider @BlackWidow**

I like it.

**First Bird Avenger @Hawkeye**

That’s also horrifying but in a completely different way.

**Witchy Woman @ScarletWitch**

Moving on from…that: everybody’s ready for the Stark Industries Halloween party, right?

**First Bird Avenger @Hawkeye**

Yes!

**Iced Americano @CaptainAmerica**

**@BuckyBarnes** and I are ready.

**Original Spider @BlackWidow**

Everyone has a costume, right? **@IronMan**

**Friendly Neighborhood @Spiderman**

Don’t worry, Natasha. I talked him into letting me paint his face at least.

**Tired Old Man @BuckyBarnes**

**@Spiderman** How’d you manage that?

**You Know Who I Am @IronMan**

Do you really want to know?

**Better Bird Avenger @Falcon**

We do not.

**You Know Who I Am @IronMan**

**@ScarletWitch** Thor, Loki, and Bruce aren’t gonna make it though.

**Witchy Woman @ScarletWitch**

Aw, how come?

**Friendly Neighborhood @Spiderman**

They’re staying in New Asgard. The [Winternights](http://thepaganjourney.weebly.com/winternights.html) celebrations last until the 2nd.

**First Bird Avenger @Hawkeye**

Bruce is really embracing the whole he’s-basically-an-Asgardian-now thing, huh?

**You Know Who I Am @IronMan**

Yeah. He’s happy.

 

 

 

**Spiderman Replied To Me!!! @SpideyStan1**

I hope we get pictures of their costumes!!!

**Look At All Those Chickens @ImADuck**

Peter had to ‘convince’ him, did he? #IronSpider

**Give Me A D @ImNotAEvenACheerleader**

Not gonna lie though, Peter painting Tony’s face is adorable. #IronSpider

**In Front Of My Salad!!! @IDon’tEvenLikeSalad**

Aw, I love how happy Tony seems just because he knows Bruce is happy!!! #ScienceBros

**Im Doing My Best @AmIThough**

Damn right Bruce is happy in New Asgard. #Thruce

**Goodbye Lucy @LucilleSanders**

My gods, **@Spiderman** is a good artist…

**Winter Never Left @AstridHaugen**

Yes! Winternights! Pagan pride!

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Yes. During holiday chapters, Thor and Loki (plus Bruce) will be celebrating Pagan holidays because, well, why wouldn't they?  
> I'll post a chapter about the Halloween party later today.  
> Let me know what you thought and any ideas you might have!


	45. Happy Halloween

**Witchy Woman @ScarletWitch**

Happy Halloween!

_[It’s a picture of all the Avengers in their Halloween costumes. Clint is wearing the forest green of Robin Hood, his actual bow in hand. Sam has on the yellow shirt and blue cloak of Lando. Steve and Bucky look like they stepped right out of a speakeasy in an old mob movie. Natasha’s hair is perfectly curled to transform her into a red-headed Marilyn Monroe. Wanda is wearing Princess Buttercup’s red dress with Vision beside her dressed as the Dread Pirate Roberts. Tony and Peter both have their faces painted into almost eerily realistic skulls.]_

**Original Spider @BlackWidow**

**@Hawkeye** You couldn’t resist, could you?

**First Bird Avenger @Hawkeye**

There is nothing wrong with Robin Hood.

**Witchy Woman @ScarletWitch**

I mean, were any of us really surprised at his choice?

**Iced Americano @CaptainAmerica**

No, but I could have done without him shooting random things.

**You Know Who I Am @IronMan**

Yeah, and I could have done without him trying to steal my wallet.

**First Bird Avenger @Hawkeye**

Just staying in character.

**Better Bird Avenger @Falcon**

I think we need to talk about Tony and Peter. **@Spiderman** That paint was almost _too_ realistic.

**Friendly Neighborhood @Spiderman**

Thank you. I do try.

**Tired Old Man @BuckyBarnes**

Although, it probably would have been easier to do if Tony had shaved.

**Friendly Neighborhood @Spiderman**

No.

**You Know Who I Am @IronMan**

No.

**Friendly Neighborhood @Spiderman**

Absolutely not.

**You Know Who I Am @IronMan**

Not happening.

**Tired Old Man @BuckyBarnes**

Okay. Okay. Sorry I even suggested it.

**Original Spider @BlackWidow**

**@IronMan @Spiderman** Calm down, boys.

**Witchy Woman @ScarletWitch**

While we’re talking about costumes, **@BuckyBarnes** and **@CaptainAmerica** seemed a bit _too_ comfortable playing mobsters.

**Tired Old Man @BuckyBarnes**

I don’t know what you’re talking about.

**First Bird Avenger @Hawkeye**

**@CaptainAmerica** Aren’t you Irish, Steve?

**Iced Americano @CaptainAmerica**

What are you implying?

**Original Spider @BlackWidow**

We’re not implying anything. Just answer one question: if Tony were to hack some files and really look into your family history, would he find anything… interesting?

**Iced Americano @CaptainAmerica**

_[MaybeSo.gif](https://www.google.com/search?q=maybe+so+gif&rlz=1C1CHBD_enUS720US720&sxsrf=ACYBGNS9BblSOBGvP1K02f9E_-L8XTlGSw:1572577355154&source=lnms&tbm=isch&sa=X&ved=0ahUKEwiK5IqVg8jlAhVKTt8KHXOjBDoQ_AUIEigB&biw=1600&bih=789#imgrc=zTzfdTIkGao4xM) _

**Better Bird Avenger @Falcon**

…what the hell does that mean?

 

 

 

**Spiderman Replied To Me!!! @SpideyStan1**

They all look so good!!!

**Look At All Those Chickens @ImADuck**

I love the immediate defense of Tony’s beard. #IronSpider

**Bi Bi Bi @ImNotInvisible**

Okay, I have taken anatomy classes with skulls that look more fake than that.

**Hello Darkness @MyOldFriend**

I am _living_ for Clint ‘staying in character’ by trying to steal Tony’s wallet.

**I Hate White Vans @DanielPerez**

**@MyOldFriend** Hey, steal from the rich…

**Ten Points To Slytherin @Page394**

Okay, I’m with Sam. What the _hell_ does that mean?!?

**Leslie More Like Lesbian @GirlsLoveGirls**

Natasha as Marilyn Monroe… oh wow.

**Clever Name @ActualName**

I just wanted to see the #AvengersFamily in Halloween costumes. I didn’t expect to learn that Captain _freaking_ America might have had mafia ties.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> The thing with Tony's beard came up because I decided on face paint and then thought 'well, it will probably be easiest if he shaves' followed by 'oh my gods, what blasphemy'. Let's be honest: he wouldn't shave for a one-night costume and Peter wouldn't want him to.  
> As for Bucky and Steve and the possible mafia ties, well, I read a couple of mafia AU stories and this was the result. Are the two of them just screwing with everybody? I'll leave that to your imaginations.  
> Let me know what you thought and any ideas you might have!


	46. It's Only November

**You Know Who I Am @IronMan**

**@BlackWidow** I need you to make him stop.

**Original Spider @BlackWidow**

Unfortunately, this is one area where I cannot control him.

**Tired Old Man @BuckyBarnes**

What if we tag team?

**Original Spider @BlackWidow**

It won’t work. He can’t be stopped. This is when he’s most powerful.

**First Bird Avenger @Hawkeye**

It’s true. I am my most powerful in November and December.

**Iced Americano @CaptainAmerica**

**@Hawkeye** Clint, it hasn’t even been a week. Halloween was _literally_ less than a week ago.

**You Know Who I Am @IronMan**

**@Hawkeye** Clint, if I have to listen to George Michael or Mariah Carey _one_ more time, I will lock you out of the tower. Permanently.

**First Bird Avenger @Hawkeye**

Peter wouldn’t let you.

**Friendly Neighborhood @Spiderman**

**@IronMan** Do it.

**Better Bird Avenger @Falcon**

Woah, even Peter’s done with him.

**Tired Old Man @BuckyBarnes**

**@Hawkeye** I’d be worried if I were you because if there’s anyone Tony listens to, it’s Peter.

**Witchy Woman @ScarletWitch**

**@Hawkeye** What did you do?

**First Bird Avenger @Hawkeye**

I have no idea what his problem is.

**Friendly Neighborhood @Spiderman**

**@Hawkeye** Liar!

**You Know Who I Am @IronMan**

**@Spiderman** What happened, sweetheart?

**Friendly Neighborhood @Spiderman**

There was a Christmas tree in my shop! He put garland on the front counter! Tinsel was everywhere!

**You Know Who I Am @IronMan**

**@Hawkeye** …was there now.

**Witchy Woman @ScarletWitch**

**@Hawkeye** Do you have a death wish?

**First Bird Avenger @Hawkeye**

**@Spiderman** It needed decorations!

**Friendly Neighborhood @Spiderman**

No, it didn’t. Do you know why it didn’t? Because it is the first week of November!

**Tired Old Man @BuckyBarnes**

**@Hawkeye** Haven’t you ever read _The Spider and the Fly_?

**Better Bird Avenger @Falcon**

**@Hawkeye** You’re the fly. You’re the fly who willingly went into the Spider’s Parlor.

**Tired Old Man @BuckyBarnes**

**@Hawkeye** He’s gonna kill you.

**Iced Americano @CaptainAmerica**

Okay. Okay. Everybody calm down.

**Iced Americano @CaptainAmerica**

**@Spiderman @IronMan** You two can not kill Clint or lock him out of the tower.

**Iced Americano @CaptainAmerica**

**@Hawkeye** _You_ stay out of The Parlor and use headphones if you want to listen to anymore Christmas music.

**Iced Americano @CaptainAmerica**

No Christmas until after Thanksgiving.

**First Bird Avenger @Hawkeye**

…fine.

**Friendly Neighborhood @Spiderman**

**@Hawkeye** You got lucky.

**Original Spider @BlackWidow**

Ominous and slightly threatening. I’m so proud.

 

 

 

**Spiderman Replied To Me!!! @SpideyStan1**

LMAO. I don’t know if Clint’s gonna last the holidays…

**Look At All Those Chickens @ImADuck**

Aw, Tony and Peter are both so protective! #IronSpider

**Road Work Ahead @NotAConstructionWorker**

Huh, so **@Hawkeye** is one of _those_ people.

**Im Doing My Best @AmIThough**

Great. Now both songs are stuck in my head.

**It Is What I Think @RebeccaLopez**

“No Christmas until after Thanksgiving.” I’m gonna need **@CaptainAmerica** to go to every store in the country and tell _them_ that.

**Give Me A D @ImNotAEvenACheerleader**

Honestly, I can’t judge. I’ve had Mariah Carey on repeat for days.

**Goodbye Lucy @LucilleSanders**

Note to self: Do not mess with Spider’s Parlor.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Yeah, Clint's one of those people. Also, yes, Peter and Tony are both very protective of Spider's Parlor.   
> Let me know what you thought and any ideas you might have!  
> PS: Sorry not sorry if I got the songs stuck in your head.


	47. They Have A Plan

**Original Spider @BlackWidow**

The living room looks like an arts and crafts store.

**Witchy Woman @ScarletWitch**

At least Jenny seems to be enjoying all the discarded yarn.

**First Bird Avenger @Hawkeye**

Yeah, and Lola took one of the finished blankets for herself.

**Tired Old Man @BuckyBarnes**

**@Hawkeye** Is that where the green one went?

**First Bird Avenger @Hawkeye**

She dragged it to her bed. You’re definitely not getting that one back any time soon.

**Friendly Neighborhood @Spiderman**

She can keep it.

**Better Bird Avenger @Falcon**

What are you two even going to do with all these blankets?

**Tired Old Man @BuckyBarnes**

We have a plan.

**Iced Americano @CaptainAmerica**

Do we get to know this plan?

**Friendly Neighborhood @Spiderman**

We’re dropping them all by some of the homeless shelters later today.

**Friendly Neighborhood @Spiderman**

**@IronMan** Which reminds me, we’re borrowing one of the cars later.

**You Know Who I Am @IronMan**

**@Spiderman** Sure thing, sweetheart.

**Witchy Woman @ScarletWitch**

**@BuckyBarnes @Spiderman** You absolute cinnamon rolls!

 **Better Bird Avenger** **@Falcon**

Really? Even **@BuckyBarnes**?

**Original Spider @BlackWidow**

**@Falcon** He’s like a slightly scorched cinnamon roll. A little damaged, but still perfectly good.

**Tired Old Man @BuckyBarnes**

**@BlackWidow** Thanks, Nat.

**Iced Americano @CaptainAmerica**

**@BuckyBarnes** You’ve gotten really good at the knitting thing.

**Friendly Neighborhood @Spiderman**

He has! **@BuckyBarnes** You’ve improved so much!

**Witchy Woman @ScarletWitch**

Once again, he looks so proud to get a compliment from the teacher.

**Tired Old Man @BuckyBarnes**

**@ScarletWitch** Shut up.

**You Know Who I Am @IronMan**

Okay, okay. Before anyone starts arguing, I feel like I should tell you that the tree just arrived.

**First Bird Avenger @Hawkeye**

Yes! It’s time to decorate!

**Better Bird Avenger @Falcon**

**@IronMan** …what did you just do?

 

 

**Spiderman Replied To Me!!! @SpideyStan1**

I can not wait to see the end result of Clint’s decorating.

**Look At All Those Chickens @ImADuck**

I love how Tony didn’t even question Peter taking one of his cars for a day. #IronSpider

**More Like Hurricane Tortilla @KatrinaGranger**

They _are_ just a couple of cinnamon rolls!

**In Front Of My Salad!!! @IDon’tEvenLikeSalad**

Okay, I love that they're taking a bunch of homemade blankets to homeless shelters. I _also_ love that Lola got to steal one for herself.

**Ten Points To Slytherin @Page394**

**@IDon’tEvenLikeSalad** I appreciate that Jenny is apparently just playing in their yarn.

**Road Work Ahead @NotAConstructionWorker**

I have a feeling that if **@Hawkeye** has his way, Avengers Tower is gonna look like the Hallmark channel threw up on it.

**Bi Bi Bi @ImNotInvisible**

**@NotAConstructionWorker** I’m here for it.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm back! Unfortunately, finals means that I haven't posted in a while and so we kind of skipped Thanksgiving; however, Christmas/Hanukkah/Yule is in full swing!  
> You can expect to hear about the results of the decorating in the next chapter, hopefully some time tomorrow.  
> Let me know what you guys thought and any ideas you might have!


	48. A Monster Unleashed

**Tired Old Man @BuckyBarnes**

We’ve unleashed a monster.

_[It’s a picture of a huge Christmas tree in the tower’s living room. Clint is standing in front of it wearing a Santa hat with a strand of garland wrapped around him like a scarf, apparently directing the others. Peter is hanging from the ceiling by a strand of webbing and appears to be wrapping lights around the top of the tree. Tony can be seen off to the side. He’s holding Jenny who looks like she wants nothing more than to explore their tree.]_

**Iced Americano @CaptainAmerica**

I’ve never seen anything like this.

**Original Spider @BlackWidow**

I told you: this is when he’s most powerful.

**You Know Who I Am @IronMan**

**@Hawkeye** Where did you even get all these decorations?

**First Bird Avenger @Hawkeye**

I’ve been stockpiling for months in preparation.

**Better Bird Avenger @Falcon**

That’s terrifying.

**Witchy Woman @ScarletWitch**

What’s really terrifying is the way Jenny’s eyeing the tree.

**You Know Who I Am @IronMan**

**@ScarletWitch** Why do you think I’m keeping a hand on her?

**Friendly Neighborhood @Spiderman**

Yeah, we’re definitely gonna have to keep a close eye on her for the rest of the month.

**Iced Americano @CaptainAmerica**

**@Hawkeye** Do we really need this many decorations?

**First Bird Avenger @Hawkeye**

Yes.

**The Other Guy @BruceBanner**

**@Thor** I never realized how many Christmas traditions actually come from [Yule](https://www.thevintagenews.com/2018/12/20/yule-christmas/).

**Thunderstruck @Thor**

**@BruceBanner** Yes, elskede. Many of our ancient traditions were adopted when the Christian missionaries came.

**Friggason @Loki**

Yes, ‘adopted’.

**Thunderstruck @Thor**

**@Loki** We’re not doing this right now, Loki. Unless, of course, you’d like to talk about certain decorations? [Mistletoe](https://norse-mythology.org/tales/the-death-of-baldur/), perhaps?

**Friggason @Loki**

…Let us return to decorating, brother. We have no time for conversation.

**Better Bird Avenger @Falcon**

What just happened? What does mistletoe have to do with anything?

**The Other Guy @BruceBanner**

**@Falcon** It’s probably best if you just don’t ask.

 

 

**Spiderman Replied To Me!!! @SpideyStan1**

Alright, time to study up on Norse traditions and mythology.

**Ten Points To Slytherin @Page394**

Oh no. Jenny is one of _those_ cats. Best of luck to the Avengers.

**Winter Never Left @AstridHaugen**

Oof. The mistletoe. Yikes. I do love Thor calling Bruce ‘elskede’ again though. #OTP #Thruce #PaganPride

**Theres A Bee!!??!! @EthanyWithaB**

I have never heard someone use the term ‘stockpiling’ to describe Christmas decorations before.

**Goodbye Lucy @LucilleSanders**

That is one of the biggest Christmas trees I’ve ever seen.

**Hello Darkness @MyOldFriend**

**@LucilleSanders** Good thing they’ve got Spidey to reach the top.

**Bi Bi Bi @ImNotInvisible**

Clint with a garland scarf is literally me all through December.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Clint really likes Christmas guys. And, of course, I couldn't have them decorate without bringing up the similarities between modern Christmas and ancient Yule.   
> Also, yes, Jenny will be watching that tree all month.   
> Let me know what you guys thought and any ideas you might have!


	49. No Hibernating

**Friendly Neighborhood @Spiderman**

It’s snowing and I don’t like it.

_[It’s a picture of New York City covered in a layer of snow. The picture was clearly taken from the top of a very tall building.]_

**You Know Who I Am @IronMan**

Again, I thought we agreed you’d stop taking dangerous pictures from the tops of buildings.

**Friendly Neighborhood @Spiderman**

Honey, _I_ never agreed. I’m perfectly safe.

**Iced Americano @CaptainAmerica**

**@IronMan** He’s fine, Tony.

**Tired Old Man @BuckyBarnes**

**@IronMan** Yeah, I mean, he climbs skyscrapers for fun and his balance is _literally_ inhuman.

**Better Bird Avenger @Falcon**

**@Spiderman** If you hate the snow so much than why are you outside and who knows how many feet in the air?

**Friendly Neighborhood @Spiderman**

Just because it’s snowing doesn’t mean I can just not patrol.

**First Bird Avenger @Hawkeye**

Wait, I thought you weren’t supposed to be in the cold?

**Original Spider @BlackWidow**

Yes, младший брат, you’re supposed to be staying warm.

**You Know Who I Am @IronMan**

**@BlackWidow** That’s what the heater’s for.

**Iced Americano @CaptainAmerica**

Heater?

**Friendly Neighborhood @Spiderman**

Tony put a heating function in the suit he made.

**Witchy Woman @ScarletWitch**

**@Spiderman** That’s good because you are _not_ allowed to hibernate.

**Original Spider @BlackWidow**

**@Spiderman** Absolutely not.

**Friendly Neighborhood @Spiderman**

I only even came close one time! And that was years ago!

**You Know Who I Am @IronMan**

**@Spiderman** That was one time too many, sweetheart.

**Friendly Neighborhood @Spiderman**

**@IronMan** I highly doubt _that_ is gonna happen again.

**First Bird Avenger @Hawkeye**

What did happen exactly?

**Tired Old Man @BuckyBarnes**

Yeah, how’d you get too cold?

**Friendly Neighborhood @Spiderman**

I may have gone for a little swim in a freezing river.

**Better Bird Avenger @Falcon**

And you did this because…?

**Friendly Neighborhood @Spiderman**

It’s not like it was voluntary.

**Witchy Woman @ScarletWitch**

Was it one of your weird villains?

**Friendly Neighborhood @Spiderman**

Yeah.

**Tired Old Man @BuckyBarnes**

**@Spiderman** You do have a lot of weird villains.

**Friendly Neighborhood @Spiderman**

…yeah.

 

 

**Spiderman Replied To Me!!! @SpideyStan1**

I love how resigned Peter seems about his “weird villains”.

**Im Doing My Best @AmIThough**

**@SpideyStan1** I mean, they’re not wrong. Those guys _are_ weird.

**Look At All Those Chickens @ImADuck**

Tony put a heater in his suit!!! He’s so protective!!! #OTP #IronSpider

**Leslie More Like Lesbian @GirlsLoveGirls**

That picture is so pretty!

**Give Me A D @ImNotAEvenACheerleader**

**@GirlsLoveGirls** Yeah, it’s pretty, but can you just imagine looking out the window on the twenty-fifth floor or whatever and just seeing Spidey on the building across from you trying to take a picture?!?

**Clever Name @ActualName**

**@ImNotEvenACheerleader** I would love that more than you can even imagine.

**Hello Darkness @MyOldFriend**

Guys, remember when Tony mentioned that he and Peter don’t really swim and Peter said it's because of bad experiences…?

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I just have to poke fun at Spiderman's villains because, really, they are pretty weird. Peter constantly scaring Tony by taking pictures from skyscrapers is a shout out to comic!Peter's photography hobby.  
> Let me know what you guys thought and any ideas you might have!


	50. Snow Is Not Useful

**First Bird Avenger @Hawkeye**

We tried to convince him to come play in the snow with us. He refused to move.

_[It’s a picture of Peter sitting on the couch surrounded by a nest of blankets and pillows. Jenny can be seen on the back of the couch, half on it and half on Peter’s shoulders. Lola’s head is in his lap and the only part of her that’s visible, the rest hidden under a couple of blankets.]_

**Tired Old Man @BuckyBarnes**

We knew it was a longshot when we asked.

**Friendly Neighborhood @Spiderman**

I don’t like the cold. I especially don’t like snow.

**Witchy Woman @ScarletWitch**

But it’s so pretty!

**Friendly Neighborhood @Spiderman**

And I can look at it from inside. We have windows.

**You Know Who I Am @IronMan**

Peter hates snow. He says it does nothing for him anymore so it’s pointless.

**Iced Americano @CaptainAmerica**

**@Spidreman** What do you mean “it does nothing for you”?

**Better Bird Avenger @Falcon**

**@Spiderman** Yeah, at what point was snow helping you with anything?

**Friendly Neighborhood @Spiderman**

Snow has not been useful to me since it was capable of canceling school for the day.

**First Bird Avenger @Hawkeye**

…that’s fair.

**Original Spider @BlackWidow**

**@Spiderman** It’s good that you’re staying warm inside, but you definitely would have been helpful outside.

**You Know Who I Am @IronMan**

Who ended up winning your snowball fight anyway?

**Iced Americano @CaptainAmerica**

It was a tie between **@BuckyBarnes** and **@BlackWidow**.

**Better Bird Avenger @Falcon**

**@ScarletWitch** was more focused on looking at the snow and **@Hawkeye** kept getting distracted and building snowmen.

**Tired Old Man @BuckyBarnes**

Which is why there are now about 12 snowmen in one area of the park.

**First Bird Avenger @Hawkeye**

Say what you want because I had fun.

**Witchy Woman @ScarletWitch**

Me too!

 

 

 

**Spiderman Replied To Me!!! @SpideyStan1**

Honestly, I wouldn’t move from the blanket nest either.

**I Cant Pick One @AvengersStan**

That thing about snow only being useful when it can cancel school? I felt that.

**I Hate White Vans @DanielPerez**

I love the fact that **@Hawkeye** is a sniper but seems to lose focus so easily.

**Road Work Ahead @NotAConstructionWorker**

Aw, the #AvengersFamily playing in the snow together!!!

**Goodbye Lucy @LucilleSanders**

I wanna see the snowmen!

**Paws and More @QueensAnimalShelter**

Glad to see that Jenny and Lola seem to be enjoying their home so much!

**I Know How To Pronounce My State @ItShouldBeArKansas**

I’m actually kinda happy that **@Spiderman** stayed inside. I mean, am I the only one constantly worried ever since we found out about the thermoregulation thing?!?

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Yes, for a sniper Clint does get rather easily distracted. Also, Peter's opinion on snow is definitely a self-reflection. I'm an online college student. Snow does absolutely nothing to help me anymore.  
> Let me know what you thought and any ideas you have!


	51. Cats and Trees

**Better Bird Avenger @Falcon**

Okay, who was supposed to be watching the cat?

_[It’s a picture of Jenny[peeking out of the Christmas tree.](https://www.google.com/search?q=cat+in+christmas+tree&rlz=1C1CHBD_enUS720US720&sxsrf=ACYBGNQeMQwRX2Ox7kbPXfH8HtxqN6qW4g:1576918006895&source=lnms&tbm=isch&sa=X&ved=2ahUKEwiI5Y-trcbmAhXRU80KHcrfCiYQ_AUoAnoECA0QBA&biw=1600&bih=789#imgrc=SR4tJRqO2-ukXM) Her face is the very picture of innocence, as if she has no idea why they would have a problem with her resting place.]_

**Tired Old Man @BuckyBarnes**

I was. I wondered where she had gotten to…

**Better Bird Avenger @Falcon**

**@BuckyBarnes** Why am I not surprised you can’t even babysit a cat?

**Tired Old Man @BuckyBarnes**

Shut up, Sam.

**Iced Americano @CaptainAmerica**

You two stop arguing. **@Falcon** She didn’t break anything, did she?

**First Bird Avenger @Hawkeye**

She better not have.

**Better Bird Avenger @Falcon**

It doesn’t look like she did. She’s just lying in the tree.

**You Know Who I Am @IronMan**

**@Hawkeye** Calm yourself, feathers. I’m getting her out now. Your precious decorations will be fine.

**First Bird Avenger @Hawkeye**

Lola doesn’t do this. She hasn’t messed with any decorations.

**Friendly Neighborhood @Spiderman**

**@Hawkeye** You leave Lola out of this.

**You Know Who I Am @IronMan**

**@Hawkeye** Yeah. Don’t compare our girls like that.

**Witchy Woman @ScarletWitch**

Uh oh. Clint’s in trouble.

**Iced Americano @CaptainAmerica**

**@Hawkeye** Clint, for your own safety I’m going to suggest you leave Lola and Jenny alone.

**First Bird Avenger @Hawkeye**

…that’s probably a good idea.

**Tired Old Man @BuckyBarnes**

**@BlackWidow** So, when does Clint’s ‘Christmas Fever’ end?

**Original Spider @BlackWidow**

He’ll be back to normal around New Year’s Eve.

**Witchy Woman @ScarletWitch**

Will the Christmas songs last that long too?

**Original Spider @BlackWidow**

Unfortunately.

**First Bird Avenger @Hawkeye**

Hey, I’m not the only one singing Christmas songs! **@Spiderman**

**Friendly Neighborhood @Spiderman**

**@Hawkeye** Yeah, but I don’t keep Mariah Carey and George Michael on repeat.

**You Know Who I Am @IronMan**

Don’t forget that one Bublé album.

**Better Bird Avenger @Falcon**

**@Spiderman** True, but you do keep singing ‘Kidnap the Sandy Claws’ and ‘What’s This?’.

**First Bird Avenger @Hawkeye**

Exactly!

**Friendly Neighborhood @Spiderman**

Both of which are better choices than Clint’s.

**You Know Who I Am @IronMan**

They really are.

**First Bird Avenger @Hawkeye**

Okay, we all know why you’re saying that, and it has nothing to do with the actual songs.

**You Know Who I Am @IronMan**

I have no idea what you’re talking about.

 

 

 

**Spiderman Replied To Me!!! @SpideyStan1**

Aw, I love the #AvengersFamily getting annoyed with each other during the holidays!

**I Cant Pick One @AvengersStan**

**@SpideyStan1** That’s how you know they’re really a family.

**More Like Hurricane Tortilla @KatrinaGranger**

I love that they’re apparently taking turns trying to control Jenny and keep her out of the tree.

**Look At All Those Chickens @ImADuck**

They called Lola and Jenny their girls!!! We stan protective dads!!! #IronSpider

**Ten Points To Slytherin @Page394**

They’re lucky Jenny seems to be the type of cat to just play in the tree. Mine likes the ornaments…

**Leslie More Like Lesbian @GirlsLoveGirls**

Does Michael Bublé really only have one Christmas album? It just feels like he has more…

**More Like Hurricane Tortilla @KatrinaGranger**

I am _living_ for Peter’s love of Tim Burton/The Nightmare Before Christmas.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Can you guess what my favorite Halloween/Christmas movie is yet?  
> Honestly, I'm most excited for the chapter I have planned on actual Christmas day. I mean, I've had it written since, like, August. Spoiler: It's just everybody being cute together for the holidays.  
> Let me know what you thought and any ideas you might have!  
> P.S. I've been busy lately with an idea I had for an Avengers/Percy Jackson crossover. How do you guys feel about Percy and Thor dating and being cute together? Obviously, it would be separate from this little universe and it would just ignore the Magnus Chase series, but...  
> Here's an excerpt from what I've already written. Let me know if you're interested!
> 
> Percy looks up at Thor as he feels a broad palm cup his face. “We shouldn’t…” he trails off as his own hands subconsciously land on the god’s chest. “This is a bad idea,” he murmurs as sea green eyes lock with sky blue.  
> “Is it?” Thor asks quietly, weapon callused thumb brushing softly over Percy’s cheekbone as his other hand lands on his hip.  
> Percy’s eyes slip closed. “I don’t know,” he says honestly. “I feel like it should be, but…”


	52. Happy Holidays

**Iced Americano @CaptainAmerica**

Happy holidays everybody!

_[It’s a picture of a beautifully decorated Christmas tree in the corner of the Avenger’s living room. On the front, among all the other ornaments, you can see one for each Avenger, each with their symbols.]_

_[It’s a picture of a lovely table draped in a bright blue cloth with a beautiful golden menorah at its center.]_

_[It’s a picture of a finely crafted pine wreath hanging on the wall. It’s decorated with pine cones and different wood carvings of Norse runes.]_

_[It’s a picture of Peter and Wanda standing in the kitchen, surrounded by baking utensils and ingredients. They’re looking up from their baking to smile at the camera and both have flour dusted over their clothes and in their hair.]_

_[It’s a picture of Lola wearing a Santa hat, mouth open like she’s smiling at the camera, with Jenny crawling on top of her and clearly batting at the white ball on the end.]_

_[It’s a short video of Jenny and Sophia pawing at a wooden dreidel as it spins between them and across the floor.]_

_[It’s a picture of what looks like enough cookies to feed an army. They’re clearly homemade and while some are better decorated than others, they’re all beautiful. There’s Christmas trees, ornaments, menorahs, runes, dreidels, wreaths, candles, snowflakes, and Stars of David.]_

_[It’s a picture of Lola lying on her back and chewing on a stuffed candy cane toy.]_

_[It’s a picture of Tony who seems to have caught Jenny midair in what was clearly a leap for the Christmas tree. Loki can be seen laughing in the background while holding a perfectly behaved Sophia.]_

_[It’s a picture of mistletoe hanging in what is clearly the tower’s living room.]_

_[It’s a picture of Vision and Wanda under the mistletoe. Wanda has one hand cupping Vision’s face while his rest lightly on her hips as they kiss.]_

_[It’s a picture of Steve and Bucky kissing under the mistletoe. Steve has one arm wrapped around Bucky’s waist, pulling him close, while Bucky’s arms rest over his shoulders.]_

_[It’s a picture of Natasha and Pepper caught under the mistletoe. Natasha has one hand up like she’s just brushed a piece of Pepper’s hair out of her face. They’re sharing a soft kiss, both of their cheeks clearly flushed red.]_

_[It’s a picture of Thor and Bruce under the mistletoe. Thor has both of his big hands cupping Bruce’s face, leaning down so he can kiss him. Bruce is standing on his tiptoes, both hands gripping Thor’s biceps.]_

_[It’s a picture of Peter and Tony kissing under the mistletoe. Tony has one hand on Peter’s lower back and the other between his shoulder blades as he dips him lightly. Peter has one hand on the back of Tony’s neck while the other is flat against his chest, right where the arc reactor used to be like always.]_

_[It’s a picture of Loki, Clint, and Sam all standing under the mistletoe. Loki is standing between the two of them, eyes squeezed shut and nose crinkled as he tries to hide a smile. Clint and Sam are on either side of him, leaning on their tiptoes and braced on his arms, as they press what is clearly a loud and smacking kiss to each cheek.]_

**Spiderman Replied To Me!!! @SpideyStan1**

Happy holidays!! Look at this #AvengersFamily!!!

**Look At All Those Chickens @ImADuck**

The mistletoe pictures!!! Look at my OTP!!! #IronSpider

**Leslie More Like Lesbian @GirlsLoveGirls**

I am hyperventilating. Look at Natasha and Pepper!

**Ten Points To Slytherin @Page394**

LMAO. Poor Loki.

**Give Me A D @ImNotAEvenACheerleader**

Oof. I’m glad **@IronMan** managed to catch jenny.

**Bi Bi Bi @ImNotInvisible**

Now I want cookies.

**Winter Never Left @AstridHaugen**

The mistletoe pictures are so cute!!! #Thruce #Stucky #ScarletVision #IronSpider #WhatAreWeCallingNatashaPepper

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Happy holidays! Whatever you celebrate, I hope it's a good one.   
> How do we feel about Natasha/Pepper? It kinda came out of nowhere, but I think I like it.  
> Let me know what you thought and any ideas you might have!


	53. Clint Doesn't Like Secrets

**First Bird Avenger @Hawkeye**

So, was no one gonna tell me that Steve and Bucky got married?!?

**Better Bird Avenger @Falcon**

What? I mean, I know they act like an old married couple, but I didn’t know it was official.

**Witchy Woman @ScarletWitch**

**@BuckyBarnes @CaptainAmerica** Since when?

**Tired Old Man @BuckyBarnes**

About a year ago.

**First Bird Avenger @Hawkeye**

Seriously, did anyone besides them know?

**Original Spider @BlackWidow**

I knew.

**Witchy Woman @ScarletWitch**

That surprises absolutely no one.

**Better Bird Avenger @Falcon**

How come Natasha got to know?

**Iced Americano @CaptainAmerica**

Natasha was our witness.

**First Bird Avenger @Hawkeye**

I swear to the gods, no one else had better be secretly married.

**First Bird Avenger @Hawkeye**

**@Spiderman @IronMan** I’m looking at you two when I say that.

**Friendly Neighborhood @Spiderman**

You have nothing to worry about, Clint.

**You Know Who I Am @IronMan**

Do you honestly think I would be quiet about it if I got that man to marry me?

**Tired Old Man @BuckyBarnes**

He’d be screaming it from the rooftops.

**Original Spider @BlackWidow**

It’s not them you should worry about. **@ScarletWitch** Wanda?

**Witchy Woman @ScarletWitch**

Vision and I are not married.

**Witchy Woman @ScarletWitch**

**@Thor @BruceBanner** You two wanna chime in?

**The Other Guy @BruceBanner**

Nothing to worry about here either.

**Thunderstruck @Thor**

Yes. You would all know if the two of us were married.

**Iced Americano @CaptainAmerica**

**@BruceBanner** Wouldn’t that technically make you royal consort?

**The Other Guy @Bruce Banner**

It would, yes.

**Friendly Neighborhood @Spiderman**

I guess there is no way you two _could_ be quiet about a wedding, huh?

**Friggason @Loki**

The celebrations in New Asgard would last a week at the least.

**You Know Who I Am @IronMan**

**@BruceBanner** Wow. The Asgardians really do like you, don’t they?

**Thunderstruck @Thor**

Of course they do! How could they possibly not?

**Witchy Woman @ScarletWitch**

Aw, cute!

**Friggason @Loki**

Bruce is as red as Thor’s cape right now.

 

 

 

**Look At All Those Chickens @ImADuck**

You know Tony would _definitely_ be shouting from the rooftops!!! #IronSpider

**Theres A Bee!!??!! @EthanyWithaB**

#Stucky is married! I repeat, #Stucky is married!!! #OTP

**Leslie More Like Lesbian @GirlsLoveGirls**

I’m convinced that **@BlackWidow** knows all and I’m okay with it.

**Im Doing My Best @AmIThough**

Why do I get the feeling Loki only ever calls **@BruceBanner** and **@Thor** by their first names?

**Ten Points To Slytherin @Page394**

**@AmIThough** Because Loki loves his brother (even if he won’t admit it) and he and Bruce are totally bros.

**Winter Never Left @AstridHaugen**

The only royal wedding I care about. #Thruce

**Spiderman Replied To Me!!! @SpideyStan1**

The #AvengersFamily is full of power couples and I love it.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> So, yeah. Steve and Bucky decided they wanted to be married but they didn't want a big fuss.   
> Loki and Bruce are absolutely bros and New Asgard absolutely loves Bruce. They're just waiting for Thor to make him the official consort.   
> Also, yes, I made Clint be the one to find out because of the whole 'secret family' thing in Age of Ultron. He's not married/a father in this universe because he's much closer to comic!Clint but I thought it would be fun.  
> Let me know what you thought and any ideas you might have!


	54. Tax Time

**Witchy Woman @ScarletWitch**

I do not understand the American tax system.

**Better Bird Avenger @Falcon**

That’s okay, Wanda. No one but accountants really understand it.

**Original Spider @BlackWidow**

**@ScarletWitch** Pepper says you can head over to the finance department and they’ll help you file.

**Witchy Woman @ScarletWitch**

Oh, good. Watching **@Spiderman** was just making me more confused. There are so many different papers.

**First Bird Avenger @Hawkeye**

Papers?!? Like, physical papers?!?

**Iced Americano @CaptainAmerica**

**@Spiderman** Even _I_ can’t believe you still do this stuff on actual paper.

**Friendly Neighborhood @Spiderman**

I just like to see it all in front of me before I officially file.

**You Know Who I Am @IronMan**

**@Spiderman** Sweetheart, would you please just take advantage of the accountants I’ve been offering for years?

**Friendly Neighborhood @Spiderman**

I have a system, Tony.

**You Know Who I Am @IronMan**

You can still go over everything before it’s done.

**Friendly Neighborhood @Spiderman**

Leave my system alone, honey.

**Original Spider @BlackWidow**

**@Spiderman @IronMan** Just think: this time next year you two could be filing together.

**Witchy Woman @ScarletWitch**

Aw, how romantic!

**Friendly Neighborhood @Spiderman**

**@ScarletWitch** Hush, you.

**Better Bird Avenger @Falcon**

They could be doing it now but they’re not as impolite as _some_ people. **@CaptainAmerica @BuckyBarnes**

**Iced Americano @CaptainAmerica**

**@Falcon** For the last time, we’re sorry Natasha was our witness instead of you.

**Tired Old Man @BuckyBarnes**

**@Falcon** I’m not.

**Better Bird Avenger @Falcon**

**@BuckyBarnes** Shut up, RoboCop.

**Tired Old Man @BuckyBarnes**

Wait, wait, wait. **@IronMan** You’re a billionaire.

**You Know Who I Am @IronMan**

Congratulations on your grasp of the obvious. What’s your point?

**Tired Old Man @BuckyBarnes**

Do we even wanna know what kind of tax bracket you’re in?

**You Know Who I Am @IronMan**

No. You don’t.

**First Bird Avenger @Hawkeye**

Wait, do Steve and Bucky get an over 65 deduction?

**Iced Americano @CaptainAmerica**

Damn right we do.

**Better Bird Avenger @Falcon**

Is that even legal? I mean…

**Tired Old Man @BuckyBarnes**

Hey, we’re just being honest about our birth dates.

**Witchy Woman @ScarletWitch**

See, this is why I’m confused!

**Witchy Woman @ScarletWitch**

I should have just moved to Norway with the Asgardians.

 

 

 

**Spiderman Replied To Me!!! @SpideyStan1**

I feel Wanda’s confusion on a deep and personal level.

**Look At All Those Chickens @ImADuck**

I love how the Avengers have switched from trying to get #IronSpider to date to trying to get them married!!! #OTP

**I Know How To Pronounce My State @ItShouldBeArKansas**

Why do I get the feeling that **@CaptainAmerica** and **@BuckyBarnes** would fully commit tax fraud if they could get away with it?

**It Is What I Think @RebeccaLopez**

**@ItShouldBeArKansas** Probably because they definitely would.

**Winter Never Left @AstridHaugen**

**@ScarletWitch** was 100% including **@BruceBanner** as an Asgardian and I love it!

**More Like Hurricane Tortilla @KatrinaGranger**

Sam is so salty about the secret #Stucky wedding.

**Clever Name @ActualName**

Man, what _is_ Tony Stark’s tax bracket like?

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Guess who's just as confuddled by filing her taxes as she is every year? That's right, it's me!  
> Also, yes. Those boys would 100% commit tax fraud with no shame. (It's mainly Pepper that stops it from happening.)  
> Let me know what you thought and any ideas you might have!


	55. Pure Concentration

**Original Spider @BlackWidow**

Pure concentration.

_[It’s a picture of Peter and Tony sitting at a large dining table. Peter has one hand flat on the tabletop while the other is held in Tony’s. Tony has an open bottle of dark red nail polish beside him, his brow furrowed as he carefully paints Peter’s nails. Peter is smiling fondly as he watches him, the very definition of heart eyes.]_

**Witchy Woman @ScarletWitch**

In all honesty though, he actually did a really good job.

**Tired Old Man @BuckyBarnes**

Yeah, I get the feeling he’s done this plenty of times before.

**Friendly Neighborhood @Spiderman**

He has.

**You Know Who I Am @IronMan**

I am an _expert_ at this point.

**Friendly Neighborhood @Spiderman**

You’ve certainly improved.

**First Bird Avenger @Hawkeye**

Oh man, how bad was it the first time?

**You Know Who I Am @IronMan**

Doesn’t matter. Now they’re perfect.

**Better Bird Avenger @Falcon**

Wow. It must have been _really_ bad.

**Witchy Woman @ScarletWitch**

**@Spiderman** Red, huh? Getting ready for Valentine’s Day?

**Friendly Neighborhood @Spiderman**

That’s actually just a coincidence. Tony picked the color.

**Iced Americano @CaptainAmerica**

If that’s the case, then I’m surprised there’s no gold.

**You Know Who I Am @IronMan**

He said no to gold this year. And to diamonds.

**Better Bird Avenger @Falcon**

What does that even mean?

**Friendly Neighborhood @Spiderman**

**@IronMan** Tony, I love you, but I do not need a 4,000$ [necklace](https://www.google.com/search?q=spider+necklace+diamond&tbm=isch&ved=2ahUKEwjG9pbtsdLnAhWRnlMKHRxOCQQQ2-cCegQIABAA&oq=spider+necklace+diamond&gs_l=img.3..0i8i30.109891.110241..110469...0.0..0.90.162.2......0....1..gws-wiz-img.......0i8i7i30.ZLyHI-2VkSE&ei=KkdHXsa5FJG9zgKcnKUg&bih=789&biw=1600&rlz=1C1CHBD_enUS720US720#imgrc=Im66JatIBRM3EM).

**Iced Americano @CaptainAmerica**

Who does?!?

**You Know Who I Am @IronMan**

**@Spiderman** It was perfect, sweetheart.

**Friendly Neighborhood @Spiderman**

**@IronMan** Tony, no. We’re going to dinner and that’s it. No crazy expensive gifts.

**Tired Old Man @BuckyBarnes**

**@Spiderman** How’d you even know about the necklace anyway?

**Friendly Neighborhood @Spiderman**

FRIDAY.

**Original Spider @BlackWidow**

You reprogrammed FRIDAY to tattle on Tony?

**Friendly Neighborhood @Spiderman**

I simply suggested to her that she tell me if he’s trying to spend too much on a personal gift.

**First Bird Avenger @Hawkeye**

**@IronMan** Ha! Betrayed by your own creation!

**You Know Who I Am @IronMan**

… me and FRIDAY are gonna have a little talk.

**Friendly Neighborhood @Spiderman**

**@IronMan** Good luck, honey. You know she likes me.

 

 

 

**Spiderman Replied To Me!!! @SpideyStan1**

LMAO. Poor Tony. #IronSpider

**Look At All Those Chickens @ImADuck**

Awww!!! Tony just wants to spoil him!!! #IronSpider #OTP

**Theres A Bee!!??!! @EthanyWithaB**

Ah, yes. The return of Spidey’s future autobiography: _Tony, no._

**Road Work Ahead @NotAConstructionWorker**

I bet it was a spider necklace. That’s right up Peter’s alley.

**Hello Darkness @MyOldFriend**

**@NotAConstructionWorker** Hey, he chose his branding and he sticks with it.

**I Hate White Vans @DanielPerez**

Okay, but can we talk about the fact that absolutely no one seems surprised that Peter can hack Tony Stark’s AI?

**It Is What I Think @RebeccaLopez**

Okay, but here’s my question: how many times has something like this happened that Peter feels the need to have FRIDAY warn him?

**Leslie More Like Lesbian @GirlsLoveGirls**

**@RebeccaLopez** Those earrings he wears? Yeah, I get the feeling they’re probably _actual_ rubies and sapphires and diamonds.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I'm personally not a fan of Valentine's Day but Tony decided he wanted to buy Peter jewelry. To which I decided: no, Peter would try to put a stop to that. Those earrings though? Yeah, they're not just twenty dollar sets he got online or something. Tony's a billionaire. What's a thousand dollar pair of ruby studs to him?  
> If you do enjoy/celebrate Valentine's Day, whether single or not, I hope you have a good one! And remember, the candy goes on sale tomorrow!  
> Let me know what you thought and any ideas you might have!


	56. Impressive Yet Terrifying

**Tired Old Man @BuckyBarnes**

I’m watching Clint purposely ignore Natasha right to her face and I’ve honestly never been more impressed and terrified at the same time.

**Better Bird Avenger @Falcon**

You literally spent decades imprisoned by an evil Nazi organization.

**Tired Old Man @BuckyBarnes**

I said what I said.

**Original Spider @BlackWidow**

**@Hawkeye** Stop ignoring me.

**First Bird Avenger @Hawkeye**

So sorry, Nat. Were you talking to me?

**Original Spider @BlackWidow**

Put your hearing aids back in right now, Clinton.

**You Know Who I Am @IronMan**

Uh-oh. Full name.

**Iced Americano @CaptainAmerica**

**@IronMan** Is that just an automatic red flag with you now?

**You Know Who I Am @IronMan**

Yes.

**Friendly Neighborhood @Spiderman**

**@IronMan** Sorry, honey.

**WitchyWoman @ScarletWitch**

**@Hawkeye** You took your hearing aids out just so you could ignore her?!?

**First Bird Avenger @Hawkeye**

I was already ignoring her. Taking them out just adds a certain level of authenticity, you know?

**Friendly Neighborhood @Spiderman**

Clint. You can read lips.

**First Bird Avenger @Hawkeye**

I don’t know what you’re talking about.

**Tired Old Man @BuckyBarnes**

Okay, now she’s just angrily signing at him.

**Better Bird Avenger @Falcon**

Is he signing back or still ignoring her?

**Tired Old Man @BuckyBarnes**

He is now.

**Witchy Woman @ScarletWitch**

What made him give in?

**Tired Old Man @BuckyBarnes**

She called him Pigeonmouth instead of Hawkeye.

**You Know Who I Am @IronMan**

Ha. Pigeonmouth. I’m gonna remember that one.

**Iced Americano @CaptainAmerica**

**@BuckyBarnes** How long until they get violent? Do I need to put them in the training room?

**Tired Old Man @BuckyBarnes**

Probably. He just called her Brown Recluse.

**Iced Americano @CaptainAmerica**

I’m on my way.

**Witchy Woman @ScarletWitch**

He’s either very brave or very foolish.

**Friendly Neighborhood @Spiderman**

How about both?

**Better Bird Avenger @Falcon**

Both is good.

 

 

**Spiderman Replied To Me!!! @SpideyStan1**

Our heroes bicker like children and I am here for it.

**Look At All Those Chickens @ImADuck**

I love how Tony is so conditioned to worry when he hears a full name, even if it’s not his. #IronSpider #OTP

**Leslie More Like Lesbian @GirlsLoveGirls**

Ah, yes. My favorite Avengers: Brown Recluse and Pigeonmouth.

**Goodbye Lucy @LucilleSanders**

Okay, **@BlackWidow** and **@Hawkeye** are a great representation of a sibling relationship. #AvengersFamily

**In Front Of My Salad!!! @IDon’tEvenLikeSalad**

**@LucilleSanders** Definitely. Let’s all just agree that there are three fine examples of siblings in the #AvengersFamily and they are: 1. Thor and Loki 2. Sam and Bucky 3. Clint and Natasha

**Ten Points To Slytherin @Page394**

Taking out your hearing aids to deliberately ignore someone is such a power move and I respect it.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I hit writer's block for this story while I was dealing with schoolwork and working on a few others but I'm back!   
> This chapter exists because I realized that I never actually pointed out that Clint is deaf in this universe. (The only reason I didn't is because, to me, all Clint Bartons are deaf Clint Bartons.) Tony 100% made him some comfortable and discreet hearing aids. Clint 100% takes them out when he's feeling petty.  
> Let me know what you thought and any ideas you might have!


	57. Spa Day

**Witchy Woman @ScarletWitch**

See. We can all get along sometimes.

_[It’s a picture of all the Avengers spread out around the tower’s living room. They all have face masks of various colors on. Clint, Sam, and Bucky appear to be playing some kind of video game. Steve is beside Bucky with a sketchpad in his lap. Wanda, Vision, and Natasha each have a copy of the same book in hand and look to be discussing it. Loki, Bruce, and Tony are talking about something as Bruce gestures at the tablet in his hand. Peter is sitting on one of the couches with Thor cross-legged on the floor in front of him, his fingers busy in long blond hair as he makes an intricate braid.]_

**Original Spider @BlackWidow**

I don’t know. The boys are getting closer and closer to violence over their game.

**You Know Who I Am @IronMan**

They’re playing Mario Kart. That’s perfectly acceptable.

**The Other Guy @BruceBanner**

He’s right. There’s a reason I never play it.

**Witchy Woman @ScarletWitch**

How long have they even been playing?

**Iced Americano @CaptainAmerica**

This is at least their twelfth race.

**Thunderstruck @Thor**

Should we make them stop?

**You Know Who I Am @IronMan**

I mean, nobody’s actually gotten violent yet.

**Friendly Neighborhood @Spiderman**

Key word being _yet._

**Friggason @Loki**

I think they will be fine.

**The Other Guy @BruceBanner**

**@Loki** You also think stabbing people is a perfectly acceptable response to things.

**Friggason @Loki**

I only stab enemies and occasionally Thor for recreation.

**Thunderstruck @Thor**

I really wish you wouldn’t, brother.

**Friendly Neighborhood @Spiderman**

**@Thor** I’ve seen him stab you. You don’t even _try_ to stop it anymore.

**Thunderstruck @Thor**

Eh.

**Iced Americano @CaptainAmerica**

Speaking of people getting stabbed, we probably need to stop the game now.

**You Know Who I Am @IronMan**

Oh gods. Who did what?

**Original Spider @BlackWidow**

Nothing's happened yet but they all have turtle shells.

**Witchy Woman @ScarletWitch**

Yeah. Okay. Cut it off. We all need to remove our masks anyway.

**Friendly Neighborhood @Spiderman**

We can just watch a movie instead. It’s probably safer.

**The Other Guy @BruceBanner**

How about the original Jurassic Park?

**Friggason @Loki**

I do like that Jeff Goldblum fellow.

 

 

**Spiderman Replied To Me!!! @SpideyStan1**

I never knew how much I needed to see the Avengers in face masks until this moment.

**Hello Darkness @MyOldFriend**

Honestly, the fact that Bruce chose a green face mask is giving me life right now.

**Winter Never Left @AstridHaugen**

Look at that braid work! Peter’s gonna have Thor looking like[ Lagertha ](https://www.google.com/search?q=lagertha+braids&rlz=1C1CHBD_enUS720US720&sxsrf=ALeKk02xFQn-eQX_6SPJiNmFtZMpO_1Mxg:1587983419759&source=lnms&tbm=isch&sa=X&ved=2ahUKEwis8ZKds4jpAhXwQ98KHaI0DTUQ_AUoAXoECA0QAw&biw=1600&bih=789#imgrc=DOHACBwRxYUUfM)by the time he’s done.

**More Like Hurricane Tortilla @KatrinaGranger**

I love how casual **@Thor** is about **@Loki** stabbing him.

**It Is What I Think @RebeccaLopez**

**@KatrinaGranger** Right?!? How often does that happen for it to be normal for them?

**Goodbye Lucy @LucilleSanders**

Look at Wanda’s French braids! I can barely manage a regular three-strand!

**Bi Bi Bi @ImNotInvisible**

The universal understanding of the anger caused by Mario Kart really is a beautiful thing.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> I think we all know why Loki likes Jeff Goldblum. Also, I just really like the idea of Loki randomly stabbing Thor because he's bored or whatever. I like to imagine that Thor just kinda sighs and goes to Bruce for a bandage.  
> Let me know what you thought and any ideas you might have!  
> P.S. The mental image of Thor with Lagertha's braids? Yes.


	58. Dunce Caps

**You Know Who I Am @IronMan**

I got in trouble for putting the dunce cap on Dum-E again.

_[It’s a picture of Peter standing beside a robot in Tony’s lab. He has a dunce cap in one hand while the other apparently pets the robotic arm. He’s frowning at the photographer, obviously Tony.]_

**Friendly Neighborhood @Spiderman**

It’s mean, Anthony.

**Witchy Woman @ScarletWitch**

Oooh, full name.

**Iced Americano @CaptainAmerica**

What did Dum-E do to deserve it this time?

**Friendly Neighborhood @Spiderman**

Absolutely nothing.

**You Know Who I Am @IronMan**

**@Spiderman** The oil in my coffee begs to differ, sweetheart.

**Tired Old Man @BuckyBarnes**

You didn’t actually drink that, did you?

**You Know Who I Am @IronMan**

Gods, no. I know better than to drink anything Dum-E makes.

**First Bird Avenger @Hawkeye**

You know, you could just upgrade him.

**You Know Who I Am @IronMan**

He gets regular updates just like the others do.

**Better Bird Avenger @Falcon**

I think he means that you could fix him.

**You Know Who I Am @IronMan**

He’s not broken!

**Friendly Neighborhood @Spiderman**

He’s perfect like he is!

**Better Bird Avenger @Falcon**

Calm down. Calm down. **@Hawkeye** said it, not me.

**First Bird Avenger @Hawkeye**

**@Falcon** I cannot _believe_ you just threw me under the bus like that.

**Witchy Woman @ScarletWitch**

**@Hawkeye** Why are you acting like they didn’t already know it was you?

**Original Spider @BlackWidow**

**@IronMan @Spiderman** Calm down, boys.

**Original Spider @BlackWidow**

No one is changing Dum-E.

**You Know Who I Am @IronMan**

Damn right they’re not.

**Friendly Neighborhood @Spiderman**

**@IronMan** No one is putting the dunce cap on him either.

**You Know Who I Am @IronMan**

I said I was sorry.

 

 

**Spiderman Replied To Me!!! @SpideyStan1**

I love how someone always makes sure to point out when Peter uses Tony’s full name. #AvengersFamily

**Look At All Those Chickens @ImADuck**

Aw, they’re so protective of their robot children!!! #IronSpider

**I Know How To Pronounce My State @ItShouldBeArKansas**

Maybe I’m just reading too much into it but insisting someone’s perfect the way they are even when they make mistakes…

**Leslie More Like Lesbian @GirlsLoveGirls**

**@ItShouldBeArKansas** Right?!? This is why they’re my heroes. It’s not just the world saving thing. It’s little things like this.

**Theres A Bee!!??!! @EthanyWithaB**

I love that **@Falcon** immediately threw **@Hawkeye** under the bus. That’s real friendship right there.

**Ten Points To Slytherin @Page394**

I’ve never met Dum-E but I would die for him.

**Im Doing My Best @AmIThough**

**@Page394** What a mood. 100% agree.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> They do love their robot children. Tony may insult them or threaten to donate them to city colleges but by the gods no one else is allowed to.  
> Plus, I like to imagine that the bots all get excited every time Peter enters the lab and he just pets them and asks what they've been up to and loves them.  
> Let me know what you guys thought and any ideas you might have!


	59. Answer The Question

**Better Bird Avenger @Falcon**

There was a spider in the kitchen, so I automatically went to kill it, right? **@Spiderman** came out of nowhere to stop me.

**Friendly Neighborhood @Spiderman**

You can’t just kill her! She doesn’t deserve that!

**You Know Who I Am @IronMan**

Yeah, we don’t kill spiders in this tower.

**Tired Old Man @BuckyBarnes**

**@Spiderman** Okay, see, you called it her. How could you possibly know that?

**Friendly Neighborhood @Spiderman**

Because I do, Bucky. I just do.

**First Bird Avenger @Hawkeye**

Can you talk to spiders?!?

**Friendly Neighborhood @Spiderman**

…

**Iced Americano @CaptainAmerica**

Peter. Please. Just answer the question.

**Friendly Neighborhood @Spiderman**

…

**Better Bird Avenger @Falcon**

What does that mean?!?

**Witchy Woman @ScarletWitch**

**@IronMan** Do _you_ know the answer?

**You Know Who I Am @IronMan**

Of course I do.

**Tired Old Man @BuckyBarnes**

Well?

**You Know Who I Am @IronMan**

…

**First Bird Avenger @Hawkeye**

I hate you both.

**Iced Americano @CaptainAmerica**

Okay. They’re obviously not answering so let’s just ask the one other person likely to know.

**Iced Americano @CaptainAmerica**

**@BlackWidow** Natasha?

**Original Spider @BlackWidow**

As much as I hate to admit it, I don’t know.

**Witchy Woman @ScarletWitch**

Wait. You _actually_ don’t know?

**Original Spider @BlackWidow**

I _actually_ don’t know.

**First Bird Avenger @Hawkeye**

Great. What are we supposed to do now?

**Friendly Neighborhood @Spiderman**

Wonder.

 

 

**Spiderman Replied To Me!!! @SpideyStan1**

Okay, either Peter really can talk to spiders or he’s just screwing with everybody and I honestly don’t know which answer I prefer.

**Road Work Ahead @NotAConstructionWorker**

**@SpideyStan1** If he is screwing with everyone then that means Tony is fully on board with it and I think that’s beautiful.

**In Front Of My Salad!!! @IDon’tEvenLikeSalad**

Honestly, I don’t even kill spiders anymore. I just move them outside and they have **@Spiderman** to thank for that.

**Look At All Those Chickens @ImADuck**

“Of course I do.” Once again, Tony is almost insulted they’d think he doesn’t know something about Peter. #IronSpider #OTP

**Leslie More Like Lesbian @GirlsLoveGirls**

I love how none of them know what to do when Natasha doesn’t know something.

**Clever Name @ActualName**

Look, if **@Spiderman** can talk to spiders then I’m gonna need him to tell them to stay out of my apartment. Use that power for good, you know?

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Do I enjoy having Peter refuse to give them a clear answer? Yes. Is it also kind of an excuse because even I haven't decided yet if he can actually talk to spiders? Also yes.  
> What do you guys think? Make it so he can talk to them or not?  
> Let me know what you guys thought and any ideas you might have!


End file.
